View Full Version : Does this sound like anxiety?
I'm sorry if this doesn't belong here, but i'm not sure where to put it...
Well the other day i had to perform, just in front of my music class, with another friend...it wasn't important and it didn't matter if it went wrong. But i still felt really really nervous. My hands shook, i couldn't play any of the chords or hit the right strings on my guitar. And i know it's perfectly common and natural for people to get nervous when performing or getting up in front of any group of people. But everyone had to do it, and no one was as nervous as me.
Then i realised, that it wasn't the only time i'd gotten "unnecessarily" nervous. I've cancelled on people at the last minute because there was a feeling in my stomach that screamed at me i didn't want to leave the house. For example, last week, my friend had invited me and a few others round to his house after school, and i told him, yes, i would go. But it came to the day, and for some reason, i don't know why, i started shaking and getting nervous, and before i even knew what i was doing i was on train back home. There's a battle of the bands concert at college next week, my friends will be there and i'd probably have a good time. But that thing is still telling me it would be a bad idea to go, so instead i'm staying home on friday night.
I also get it when talking to people...peers at school, adults, teachers (especially). Not for any reason, just in normal conversation.
I went down the other day to the chemist to see if they had anything for nerves, because that's all i thought it was. It was only then that they mentioned I might have an anxiety disorder. That really hit me, because i'd never considered that i might have one before...so I started looking it up on the net, and i noticed more things that happen that seem to contribute to it...my heart beats irregularly sometimes, i get feelings of terror for no reason when i'm by myself somewhere, like shopping, or in a guitar lesson, or i get feelings that i'm about to do something really embarrassing and i won't be able to control myself, i have trouble sleeping at nights, and wake up during the night often, i get bouts of depression, i feel faint and dizzy for no reason, nausea, stomach pains and diorrhea, chest pains, fatigue. Then you start to wonder why i didn't think this was a problem before, then i realised, because i've had it for so long, i just think this is normal. Then you realise that maybe it isn't, and then i start to fantasise what it would be like without all the feelings of fear, and now i just want them to go away...
I guess I've answered my own question in the way that I know it might be very possible i have some sort of anxiety disorder, but I'm so uneducated about this I don't know what to do. Going to the doctors would be the obvious thing, but I'm so scared she'll say that because of my age i'll just grow out of it (i'm 16) and tell me just to live with it. My mum has always had a belief that no one under the age of 21 can get depression or anxiety, because they're "adult" things.
It feels like going to my doctor is my last resort, and if she says it's nothing, I'm stuck with these feelings forever.
I'm so sorry this has gotten so long...
Hi Maria,
You have come to the right place...you'll definetly feel welcome here and there is lots of great advice to help you deal with your anxiety. It would maybe put your mind at ease to visit the doctor and explain your symptoms as there are lots of things that may cause similar symptoms (dont worry nothing serious). By doing so he can rule everything out and give you a proper diagnosis, that way you will know where you stand. Lots of people from all ages suffer anxiety and it affects us all differently too but as you read all the different pages on this site you will find there are people who have similar symptoms to you. I have suffered anxiety and panic attacks over the last 3 years and have experienced dizziness, nausea, chest pains, palpatations, tingling body etc which are similar to yours so you are not alone. Keep in touch.
sadie
Hi Maria,
It comes as a bit of a shock doesn't it that what you've been feeling for so long may actually have a name and be a disorder.
You are lucky that you've caught it before it's really started to dominate your life. I know you mention not going places but it seems to have been quite low key so far.
All the symptoms you mention are all so common for anxiety. None of them will harm you.
Your doctor will not tell you that you will grow out of it because it's not an age thing and equally shouldn't say it's nothing as it's clearly affecting you.
It depends what your expectations of going to a doctor are. She can prescribe you tablets that may help whilst you're on them but they are not a cure as such. They just help treat the symptoms. She may refer you for some counselling which may take a while to come through.
Your anxiety is showing you that there are some areas of your life that you are finding it hard to cope with at present and your body is responding by being afraid.
Your job here is to reverse that fear feelings and grow it into confidence feelings at which time the fear will disappear.
So examine what it was about shopping that scared you, what were your feelings and thoughts about what might happen to you there - eg an example you give about the possibility that you could embarrass yourself , if you were thinking or dwelling on this or anything else your body would have heard this message loud and clear and its answer is to do its utmost to remove you from the situation - which is to show you the same fear as it would if you realized you were about to be attacked - enter terror, nausea, dizzines etc.
The nervousness you felt at the performance is completely natural and a healthy nervousness that got a bit out of control as your body is starting to learn to change nervousness into panic quite easily.
You are in control of this so you can slowly teach yourself when is appropriate to panic and when isn't.
Avoidance is the biggest message you can send yourself to support the bodys decision that this situation was really fearful - so seriously do not allow yourself to avoid anything because of these feelings.
Talk to yourself really positively and continually about each and very situation you come up against that may concern you.Talk as though you were helping a best friend through a hard time and you wanted to support her as much as possible - almost like a running commentary on how well you're doing minute to minute. Talk yourself through the first minutes, whilst you're feeling these uncomfortable sensations - they will not harm you, they are just feelings and will pass. Tell yourself that feeling nervous is absolutely fine and that you will be completely fine and may even enjoy yourself.
Remind yourself that never has anything gone really wrong, that it's just thoughts you're having about being embarassing - it does not translate into actions.
There is plenty of other information on this site including some tips and medications and herbs that could help you for the moment- have a good hunt through previous posts. Use the search facility to put in your key words
Let us know how you're doing.
Meg
Watch your thoughts, they become your words...
Watch your words, they become your actions... Watch your actions, they become your habits... Watch your habits, they become your character... Watch your character, it becomes your destiny...
Dear Maria
There are three steps to helping yourself and you have already achieved the first - recognising that you have a problem. I too dislike going out, and when I am feeling bad, I have made all sorts of excuses to avoid doing thing too!
The second step is to get some help coping, and the third step is to use these techniques to help you live the life you want to lead.
Check out the coping section of this site - there are lots and lots of excellent suggestions regarding dealing with your symptoms. Regular exercise, a good health diet, learning how to breathe (honestly - most people don't do it properly!), learning how to relax are all simple and immediate ways that you can start to make yourself feel better. There are some excellent self help books on the market too, which suggest lots of ways of coping.
Having (previously) lived my life avoiding most social situations, please, please continue to go out. You feel a bit anxious, so you don't go, and your body relaxes, then you feel better, and think I made the right decision. This will continue on a cycle and become harder and harder to break. I ended up in a position where I never went out. At all. I can't believe how hard it was to start going out again when I had to.
I manage to do things by trying not to think too much about them beforehand. For example, in about 1 1/2 hrs I am going to the dentist for a filling. My palms are sweaty, I feel sick, my stomach aches, I feel anxious, tense and jumpy. The last filling I had, I was ill for THREE days and nights before. I vowed that I wasn't going to get into this state again. I have managed to blank it from my mind until this morning, and I know that once I get there, I will be in and out in twenty minutes, I won't really be sick, or need to use the toilet, because I never do, and everything will be fine.
This may work for you - try not to think about the Battle of the Bands until it's time to get ready and go. I used to worry about things weeks in advance, and although it's very easy to say, it really does make things worse if you keep thinking about them.
Most doctors are very sympathetic, although it may help to make a list of everything you want to discuss before you go in. There are many ways the doctor can help you, and many that don't include drugs if you'd prefer to try dealing with your issues without them.
Above all remember, you are not alone, about a quarter of the population suffer from some sort of anxiety, and there are lots of ways to deal with it.
You have taken the first step which is the hardest. Remember, life is for living, and you have two choices, you can fight this and lead the life you want, or you can become anxious, and let it rule your life!!! And the more you feed it the more anxious grows.
Put aside a few hours to read through this site, Meg and Nicolas advice is great, take some positive diet/exercise/relaxation action yourself, and don't be afraid to visit your doctor.
Good luck, and I hope you've been reassured that your not the only one, and help is only an e-mail away!
Charlie
How did your dentist's trip go Charlie?
Oh the usual - three trips to the loo, sweating, palpitations, a total inability to breathe properly, no matter how hard I tried my abdominal exercies, verging on being sick etc. etc, (you know what it's like), from 7.30am when I got up, through work, until 10.30am when I got to the dentist.:(
However - I must be getting better, cos I nearly fell asleep as he was taking the old filling out (although I can't say I felt very comfortable when he clamped my tooth and surrounded it with it's own little rubber sheet, and attached some mini scaffolding. And it made my gums bleed! I've been to the dentist regularly, and nobody has ever done this to me before!!! Discussed it at work, and it would appear to be related to how progressive your practice is).
Anyway, I started panicking again then - mainly because I have always been able to visualise escaping the chair if things got too bad during every trip prior.
This time however, I knew I couldn't. The little green rubber sheeting and scaffolding covered my chin, half my cheek, and most of my nose. The thought of me running out into the street with half a look a like medieval instrument of torture stuck in my mouth actually made me laugh, which calmed me down, and within a few minutes I was fine again!! (Although where I work, I really don't think anybody would have noticed).
It was a good job I hadn't tried to escape before he'd finished either, as the clamp looked like it was attached with some sort of cir-clip, and required a special tool to remove![:p]
Most important though, was that I was fine once I was there, and that I was able to do "normal" things last night, and also eat properly, so some progress has been made!!!
Thanks for asking, it's nice to be able to share things (in this case a success - hurrah):)
Take care
Charlie
Well done Charlie !!!
Excellent progress.
Meg
Thank you so much for all your replies! They do make me feel much better about all this, and I'm going to try and follow each piece of advice!
I went into the doctor's today and booked an appointment. Two of the doctors are going away for a fortnight (why do they always go away? Where do they go?) so I have an appointment in 2 weeks time exactly. I'm actually really nervous about it, because I have this feeling they'll turn round and laugh at me, and tell me nothing is wrong. I know this is very low key, but I also know what it can turn into, so I want to catch it and fight it now before it gets any worse. I'm starting to notice things, that I knew happened, but always thought was..well normal. Like how my hands shake when I talk to my teacher, and how my legs feel weak like jelly afterwards, and how my heart beat and breathing speeds up when I'm at college. It took a lot of guts just to walk into the doctors and ask for an appointment, I was getting so nervous. But I'm glad I did, because it was just last Monday I was considering leaving college because every day I got more scared of it. I don't want to throw away being at a good college, doing a good course.
Ok, sorry I'm rambling again!
Oh, and I just want to say...Lottie32 you are my idol! I've been so scared about the dentist because I was always afraid I'd have to get a filling. I think I had a perfectionist dentist too, she told me that my eating too much fruit and drinking too many diet drinks and fruit juices were ruining my teeth. I got a letter a few months ago about getting a check up but I didn't reply...
nomorepanic
20-11-03, 21:16
Charlie
I laughed and laughed at your post about the dentist - I could just see you looking like Hannibal Lecter (silence of the lambs) running out into the street panicking. What a sight!
You did so well to manage it - most people who don't suffer from panic can't cope with the dentists so us panickers do well to even get there!
I go every 6 months but I do NOT enjoy it - pinned in a chair - agghhhh!!
Well done to you!
Maria - you are doing the right thing - just take it slowly and as a lot of people on this site recommend, take some questions with you written down. Be specific with how you feel and make sure he listens to it all. Failing that burst into tears - lol. That may work. No seriously you are doing the right thing and good luck.
Nicola
Dear Maria,
Do you already have an idea of what you want from your doctor ?
The options are usually
Betablockers which can stop the racing heart, sweaty bits.
Antidepressants which are also used to abate panic/anxiety .Mood altering medication. They can really help enormously BUT if you do not do anything to help yourself learn to cope with change and pressure whilst on them , you could find yourself in the same situation in a few months time.
Some sort of talking therapy. CBT - put into search for explanation or counselling.
All your choice but he may not discuss all options with you unless you raise them.
Meg
Watch your thoughts, they become your words...
Watch your words, they become your actions... Watch your actions, they become your habits... Watch your habits, they become your character... Watch your character, it becomes your destiny...
Well done Charlie, your post made me laugh out loud:D It certainly does sound a 'progressive' treatment[:0]
Maria - good luck, make sure you let us know how you are getting on;)
Well Done Maria for realising you have a "bit" of a problem, and that acting now can stop it from getting worse.
I usually get wound up about the doctors, and it really does pay off to make some notes ready for when you get there. I once broke down whilst at the doctors, and just gave him the list!!!!
I have similar symptoms to you, and have discovered that CBT really does work for me, so I would suggest that you ask your doctor about this. I have done everything without the use of drugs (cos I'm paranoid about becoming addicted), so it is possible, just sometimes harder. But don't be afraid of using drug treatment. They are whats needed to kick start a lot of people and really do work. Just remember that what works for somebody, may not work for somebody else, so don't be too hard on yourself if you try something and don't get the desired effect.
In the meantime, try and get plenty of sleep/relaxation time, watch your diet (i.e. eat healthily) and try the breathing exercises on this site.
Good luck at the doctors. They won't laugh or not understand. There truly are lots and lots of us "mad" people out there - it's just that most of us find ways of coping, and people don't realise that we have issues. I'm sure you've realised from reading this site that you are most definitely NOT alone.
Let us know how you get on.
p.s. Glad people find my dentist post amusing - it wasn't yesterday, but today (now I'm calm again) I can laugh about it too!!! And sometimes I find it does help to "take the p*ss" out of myself - it helps the bad bits go away, and helps me focus on the positive side. I had my mouth excavated and survived!!! Mind you, three trips in two months is a bit like CBT for the dentally challenged, so I am v glad I've not got to go again for six months! My teeth aren't that bad! Just my fillings needed re-doing! Thanks for all your support xxx
Charlie
nomorepanic
21-11-03, 20:51
Charlie
You did so well at the dentist - we all felt for you, your post was just funny cos we could all picture you. I don't doubt it was terrifying at the time but the way you expressed it was very funny.
You are a very special person :-)
Nicola
Maria
Believe me - if you had seen the state of me on Thursday, I can assure you, I wouldn't have been anybodies idol!!!!!
I'm not nagging, or telling you what to do, but please keep going to the dentist. I stopped for a while, and discovered that it made me 10 times as bad, when I finally had to go back (visit or be forced to go private). Please book in for a check up, and keep going every six months.
And please, please do not give up college. I got in at Manchester Uni, and didn't go because I hadn't got my head "sorted".
I would really like you to learn by mistakes, I am in my early thirties, and although I am not bitter, I can look back on my "youth" and realise that I let a lot of opportunities slip through my fingers because I "ran away" from everything.
Please don't make the mistakes I made, make sure you get to the doctors, and let us know how to go on. The only person who can move you forward is YOU (although you can have as much help as you can find!), and I am desperatly trying to catch up now I have finally got help!
I don't regret anything, and have done lots of things that I have always wanted to do, and am generally a happy person, but there are things I could have done. I suppose the best way to describe it is that I have been living my life at 75%.
Right, lecture over!!!!! You are taking such positive steps, i know you will be feeling better soon. Please let me know how you get on at the docs. It may also help to write a resume of things you find hard to do - positive examples are sometimes easier than saying, I just don't feel like going out!
And remember, if you are not happy with the advice the first doctor gives - book an appointment with the other one! Remember, doctors are there to serve us!
Bestest wishes
Charlie
Nicola - glad I gave amusement - and it makes it easier to go next time, cos I'll just imagine us all having giggle over how easy it was really, instead of having issues about how bad it COULD be (but lets face it - never is!!)
Thanks :-)
Charlie
charlie,
its been hissing down with rain in london for two days now..but you have brought sunshine, thank you.
your a special lady..this site is lucky to have people like you aboard...best wishes..bryan.
Hi everyone.
I'm going to write out a list of things to help me when I'm at the doctors, because I know when I get there I will get too nervous and forget everything I want to say. Can I get some ideas of what sort of things people here put on it if they wrote one, just so I don't leave anything out?
write down all your symptoms
any questions you may have about drugs
what action you'd like to take, i.e referral to a therapist
Emily
Maria
I try and write down my main symptoms. When I get them. How long they last. What they stop me doing. How I feel afterwards. Don't worry about sounding stupid, just write what you feel.
It's good if you can think of some specific examples, and use them to illustrate.
Next think about what you want the outcome to be. Drugs are good, but only really as short term - your problems will still be there underneath, tell the doctor you recognise this, and ask what therapy is available at your practice - CBT, counselling.
Do not worry if you get upset. The last time I "lost it", I spent 35 mins in the consulting room, 25 of them being a snotty, red eyed mess, incapable of talking!!!!!! (It might be a good idea to take some tissues)
If you take some legible notes, and you find it hard to talk, you can always pass him your note book!!!!!!
Remember though, you are going to the docs cos you want to get better. If you look through this site you will see that there are lots of people who don't believe they will get a satisfactory response from the docs, and will be brushed off. Weeks later they have seen a health professional, and are taking action. Anxiety is a medical illness, and the vast majority of doctors recognise and treat. Remember, if you are not happy with your advice, you can always see an alternative GP at the practice.
Best of luck, you will be fine. Please let me know how you get on
Take care
Charlie
Charlie
I just want you all to know that the doctors appointment went well. She was very nice and understanding. I have a tremor so she referred me to the nurse, who will check my thyroids in a couple of weeks, to see if that is an underlying problem to the anxiety. I was also prescribed a small dosage beta-blocker - Inderal - to help calm me down when I'll need it. She did a blood pressure test, and at the time my heart rate was 118...is that really as much as it sounds? And does anyone know what they do when they check thyroids? I don't even know what they are!
hi maria,
yes,your heart rate is too high,that is why you have been prescribed beta blockers,which will help bring it down,and should also help with the anxiety.
please take,as prescribed by your doctor,and dont stop taking them,without medical advice.
best wishes..bryan.
nomorepanic
04-12-03, 20:15
Hi Maria
Glad it went well for you today. My heart rate is always faster at the docs cos I am slightly anxious when I go and sitting in the waiting room for up to an hour at a time doesn't help!
The Thyroid is a gland in the neck - not sure what it does - I am sure Meg will enlighten us!
Nicola
Hi all,
The function of the thyroid gland is to control metabolism (conversion of oxygen and calories to energy).
Every cell in the body depends upon thyroid hormones for regulation of their metabolism.
Thats why people either speed up with hyper thyroid or slow down with hypo thyroid.
The test is a blood test which measures T3 and T4 levels.
Meg
Watch your thoughts, they become your words...
Watch your words, they become your actions... Watch your actions, they become your habits... Watch your habits, they become your character... Watch your character, it becomes your destiny...
nomorepanic
05-12-03, 21:09
Thanks Meg!
Nicola
Hi again
Sorry to drag this topic back up. I didn't want to start a new one.
It seems I am right back where I started. After having my thyroid and kidneys checked they were all fine. Doctor said to keep doing things that made me panic, and come back if I was getting married/taking a driving test/doing exams, basically, if I had a reason for being anxious. I am doing the things that used to make me nervous before like shopping and i know that is a very good thing. But it's the things I do every day which are becoming more and more stressful - mostly college. It's the people and the teachers there that make me anxious. I go in feeling sick and I leave shaking. I'm self harming again because it's the only coping method I know. It just seems so trivial compared to a person who is so anxious they cannot even leave the house. And I can't even pinpoint exactly what it is making me nervous. So I feel I can't go back to the doctor or even another doctor because I will just be told to go away, and it took so much guts and stress the first time round I'm just not sure I can do it again.
nomorepanic
08-04-04, 18:31
Hi Maria
Thanks for taking the time to find an old post and not start a new one. It helps us all to read back on the previous posts you made.
Sorry to hear that you are not feeling so good again. I found that anxiety / panic didn't care when and where it got me. Once I conquered one situation that made me panicky, I found another one to take its place so everday life was hard.
Can you ask the doctor for a referral to a counsellor to help with the self-harming as that is obviously not good for you and cannot solve the issues at hand.
Try reading the "First Steps" post - it is on here under the Welcome message or at www.nomorepanic.co.uk/firststeps.htm There may be something in there that clicks with you and helps.
Good luck
Nicola
Powered by vBulletin® Version 4.2.5 Copyright © 2024 vBulletin Solutions Inc. All rights reserved.