reflect_not
29-04-08, 15:54
My troubles began when I was 13. I'd just got back from a trip to America with a parent. We went to 3 different states and probably got 6 or 7 flights. When i got home and was sat in the assembly hall at school I suddenly felt like the ground was dropping from beneath me, like I felt when I was landing or taking off on a plane.
The sound of the fans in the assembly hall bought it on, and the seating rows. I had to put my hand up and ask to leave. It was very embarrasing and I was visably shaking in front of the whole of my school year.
I never went back to assembly again, and I was put on report as a truant.
In retrospect, I hadn't a clue what was going on, I just thought I was weird and I feel that the school should have noticed a problem since it was always assembly I missed.
I was most certainly not a below average student and have missed out on so much due to this problem.
My Mum had a hole-in-the-heart and I get palpatations and I've always thought I may have that. I still don't know to this day for sure as it needs an echocardiogram to diagnose which I haven't had but I take Propranolol and I don't get anymore palpatations. Palpatations were one of the most frightening things to me as you can't rationalise them. I always feel you can rationalise any other anxious feelings with that its a fleeting thought/feeling.
These days things are as bad as they could be. I have no family and rarely see any friends. I really don't know what I'd have done if it wasn't for home food shopping online.
The last time I was happy I was working full time and going to college and did what I could of an NVQ in Care (certificate for a few units of it).
I'm frightened of working now in case I start with the anxiety attacks again and I can't go into work and I lose my job which would then mean I'd be homeless too.
I hope this makes sense as obviously not speaking to anyone or going outside probably affects your social skills a little.
Take care all.
"Jude" (not my real name)
The sound of the fans in the assembly hall bought it on, and the seating rows. I had to put my hand up and ask to leave. It was very embarrasing and I was visably shaking in front of the whole of my school year.
I never went back to assembly again, and I was put on report as a truant.
In retrospect, I hadn't a clue what was going on, I just thought I was weird and I feel that the school should have noticed a problem since it was always assembly I missed.
I was most certainly not a below average student and have missed out on so much due to this problem.
My Mum had a hole-in-the-heart and I get palpatations and I've always thought I may have that. I still don't know to this day for sure as it needs an echocardiogram to diagnose which I haven't had but I take Propranolol and I don't get anymore palpatations. Palpatations were one of the most frightening things to me as you can't rationalise them. I always feel you can rationalise any other anxious feelings with that its a fleeting thought/feeling.
These days things are as bad as they could be. I have no family and rarely see any friends. I really don't know what I'd have done if it wasn't for home food shopping online.
The last time I was happy I was working full time and going to college and did what I could of an NVQ in Care (certificate for a few units of it).
I'm frightened of working now in case I start with the anxiety attacks again and I can't go into work and I lose my job which would then mean I'd be homeless too.
I hope this makes sense as obviously not speaking to anyone or going outside probably affects your social skills a little.
Take care all.
"Jude" (not my real name)