Should I ??

[Pink Panic]

???

[milly jones]

i truely believe that a combination of meds and treatment works.

i got back to work fulltime using both

however this is i believe a lifelong illness that u have to keep keep addressing. we all slip back into our old ways as its really difficult to remodel our behaviour and thinking.

i would take health professionals advice and trust them

they see things daily and more rationally than we do.

good luck in what ever decisions u make, but at least u are aware of ur illness and taking steps to aid recovery,

best wishes milly xxxxxx

[Pink Panic]

Thanks for the quick reply Milly. :hugs:

When i'm feeling low today i think they might be the answer but on other days i think i don't need meds and they might bring more problems.
I wish i could make a decision.

Good to hear that you got back to full-time work. :yesyes:

Thanks again. :hugs:
xxxxxx

[honeybee3939]

Hiya Pink

As you know my friend, i was chuffed to bits to hear about the success you had at the ball:yesyes: . Thats one hell of a achievment for someone who found it so hard to even get through her front door previously. I think you have done so well mate to get to where you are today without the aid of any medication, i dont think i could have got to where i am today without the help of medication, so be proud of that fact too:yesyes: you have worked bloody hard im very proud of you:flowers: .
I was on Citalopram for a good few years(i have been med free for over a year now) but even when on meds i still had bad days. recently i have had a few bad patches too (stress of the house move i think) but i have got through it without resorting back to the meds.
I really dont no what to suggest about the meds Pink, i can only speak for myself and my own sittuation, but what i do no is that if i felt i was really struggling again i wouldnt hesitate about going back on them.
I know you dont like taking meds like me, so if you did want to give them ago just do what i did, start on 5mg with and work your way over a couple of weeks onto a higher dose, i never had any side effects with such a low dose, and rememebr too you hear storys on here about dizziness etc when starting them, most of my dizziness was caused by anxiety not meds so nothing new there!.

Good luck in what ever you decide to do mate, and good luck with the CBT also.:hugs:

Be proud of all the positive things you have achieved mate and focus your mind on those dont let the odd blip days get you down!

Proud of you!:yesyes:

Have a lovely weekend
:hugs:
Andrea
xxxxxx

[Lilith1980]

Hi Pink

I have never taken meds - like you I am scared of them.

I think everyone is different, for me I am finding that counselling and a lot of reading in self-help books is really making a difference. I also started a new job this week which has boosted my confidence and self esteem - external factors can play a huge part too.

From your post though you are doing incredibly well and it is only natural that people have "blips" during recovery - it doesnt necessarily mean that you're going to go all the way back down again.

For me personally, I dont think meds would help me a great deal because I have found that working on the issues in my head have really helped me. I feel a lot stronger and a lot worthier of being here if that makes sense.

The time of the month sends me into a right state as well, but I think the thing to remember is that is what is contributing to your anxiety. It will pass soon enough but maybe the key is to not try and fight it, but acknowledge it is there and will move on soon.

Obviously whether you take meds or not is down to you. I guess it depends if you think they will help, or whether you do see this as being a bit of a relapse and that it will pass.

Sorry I dont have an answer, just throwing some thoughts your way :hugs:

Jo xxxxx

[misterbean]

Hi Pink

I don't have an answer either, but reading through what you are saying and weighing up, I get the idea that you already have the seeds of your answer, scary though it is to make the choice - your evaluation of your own experience against the evaluation of an expert.

Martin

[Pink Panic]

Hi all

Thanks for your replies, they have been really helpful and gave me lots to think about.

Andrea - Great advice mate, as per usual :hugs: I'm proud of you too. :yesyes: xxx

Lilith - You gave me some thoughts that i hadn't thought of ... thank you :hugs:

Misterbean - Yes it's scary. I guess i just have to decide what feels right for me.

Pink
xxx

[girl26]

Hi..


I had also the same doubts for 2-3 months. That time I suffered from panic attacks and I have been prescribed Cipralex. I read all the side effects and didn't want to take. I was thinking that if I survived my major panic attacks in the previous weeks without any medication, why I should take meds now when I am already better. I was supposed to take 1 pill in the morning. But I didn't. I had anxiety problems mainly in the evening, and every evening I was saying "from tomorrow I will take". But in the morning I was waking up fresh and I felt like "I am OK I don't need meds." I decided on the next session to talk to my therapist whether she really thinks that I should take. That time she said "lets forget about the pills for now and try to do it without. Then we will decide."
I was doing well and we didn't mention the meds in the next sessions. However after a few weeks me and my boyfriend went to visit friends in another city and we agreed to stay in their house during the weekend. Everything was fine, but suddenly in their house I started to feel panicky. I had hard time trying to hide my panic from my friends and to look normal. Suddenly I've got many negative thoughts, I started to think what if I start shaking in front of them etc.. but I manage to control somehow. I think they didn't notice anything but I had very bad weekend. I immediately made an appointment with my therapist and described her everything. Then she said "I think you should reconsider the option of taking the meds". I felt disappointed of myself. Like.. I couldn’t manage it. Then at home I started to think that maybe she had bad approach. She didn’t talk to me to realize the reasons because of which I have panicked in my friend’s house and at home I was OK. I was working well on my recovery for few weeks and in the first time that I felt bad she prescribed me meds again. …. I was back to the question whether I should take the meds or not and I again I decided not to take.
Now I still have anxiety and I don’t know whether this will ever stop. But I have more good days than bad days. I found this site helpful and whenever I feel bad, I read the other people posts and I know I am not the only one. Anxiety books also help a lot.
I cannot say what is better for you, and I don’t know whether I did the right decision. But I believe we are the ones that can help ourselves the most.

[Bill]

Taking meds is a personal decision but once someone starts taking them, it can become difficult to stop for fear of coping without. However, if someone is depressed and suicidal for "no reason" then certainly they should take meds.

In your case though, you are feeling depressed because of trying to cope with your anxieties alone without your husband there to provide support. Therefore, once he is home, would the anxiety ease once more and so would the feelings of despair? If so, would meds then really be of any more benefit than having your husband home?

Personally, I would rather learn how to cope when I'm alone rather than take meds because meds will lift your mood but they won't cure your fear of coping alone but it's a personal choice.:hugs:

[PUGLETMUM]

:) hi pink, you know from my last pm to you that i think your problem now is the dependancy you have built up on your other half? so you have done fantasically well to recover from gad and agoro and all the horrible feelings that go with that? but you now have this problem where your life grinds to a halt when he is away? - so now you tackle this pink in the same way you tackled your problems in the first place:yesyes: take it little by little when he is away and in a matter of months you will be completely different, just apply wha tyou did before to this situation. in my experience this was almost more difficult for me than recovering from agoraphobia, becase actually agoraphobia can take the form of dependancy on another person, which is why so many ppl on here rely so heavily on other people to get out and about - so this is the last hurdle pink - becoming independant again, and you know that we are all worth the hard work that it will involve but beleive me the pay off is massive because you will really feel alive and 'normal' again to be able to do things independantly from your other half while he is away. id start by just going further and further away from your home by yourself first and then you could go out with your daughter but obviously dont become dependant on her, but being together out and about will be nice for you both:yesyes: i dont know how far away from shops etc you are but even if its just a walk for a walks sake well that is brill - its all practice. remeber how you felt when you started to out and about again with your other half? im sure at times tha tit couldnt have been easy, i know ive had some horrible times in restaraunts ans cinemas etc but if you stick wher eyou are and go through the feelings you feel better and more confident, and this is the same with you now tackling the issue of your dependancy. also like the others have said only you can decide to take meds, but if you could boost your confidence with small successes then you will prob not need them, i think youve just got bogged down in this next phase of your recovery and los tyour confidence now as to how you are going to do it? can you get the NOPANIC 12 week recovery programme to give your practice some structure and guidance, along with the cbt? take care pink you will ge there:hugs:

[misterbean]

Dear Pink

'Yes it's scary. I guess i just have to decide what feels right for me. '

You might not have read my thread 'I, Robert', you may well not see things similarly to the way I see them, and your words above are not those of a question, yet when I read them I thought 'now that's the right question'.

Best wishes

Martin

[Pink Panic]

More great replies .... thank you all so much. :hugs:

Girl26 - Your post really made me think as our experiences of panic are very similar. Thank you

Bill - You are the master of good advice and i thank you for replying. Love and & Hugs. xxx

Emma - What you said makes loads of sense and i'm determined to get started doing more on my own.

Misterbean - I'm just off to look for your post now. Thanks & best wishes.

Pink
xxx

[girl26]

Hi Pink,

Few months ago when I experienced major panic attacks I thought that I am having a heart attack or stroke... I was so scared that I was even asking my boyfriend to come with me in the toilet, as I was afraid that something may happen to me in this little room and I won't be able to go out of it. One day I get panic attack just because he was taking a shower and I realized that I am alone in the room... I just want to tell you how much I was dependable on him and how terrible my situation was.
Later everything started to improve gradually. The most important is to start being comfortable just with yourself and to realize that there is no reason to panic or being in bad mood.
I did it without medications and I think you can do it too. In my case one of the things that I was afraid from was that I may get heart attack and noone will be there to help me and I panicked. On every palpitation this thought was coming. But I knew that the meds will not help me to cure this thought. One day I said to myself that if I am going to die from heart attack or whatever, I will not stop it just by being worried all the time. I am just making it worse. On the next palpitations I was just saying "if it is destiny to happen then I cannot stop it and will just ignore it". And gradually my palpitations stopped and started being the old me.
So I think that whenever there is a will for improving it can be done without meds. Maybe more slowly but yet it can be done.

[Pink Panic]

Hi again Girl 26,

Thanks for taking the time to reply to me again :hugs:

My scenario is very similar to yours in lots of ways. Although i don't think i'm having a heart attack or stroke i do hate the symptoms of the panic, i know everyone who suffers them does, and no matter how many times i have them they still scare me so that's why i build up a dependancy on those close to me especially my partner.
With my situation the problem also is that i build up a dependancy for the 2 or 3 weeks he's home then that's it ..... he's away Offshore and i'm left totally alone for 2 weeks to just cope with it. :weep: It's not like he's just a few miles away either he's hundreds of miles away in the middle of the North Sea and i know that there is no way he can get home even if he wanted to.

We have discussed him taking an Office job where he would be home in the evenings but it would mean a long drive to work every day, the money would be very much reduced and it would be giving into my anxiety instead of working through it, plus he does enjoy his job.
I'm starting CBT this week to help me through my probs so hopefully that will help.
Thank you again for your replies and please keep in touch. :hugs:

[PUGLETMUM]

:hugs: hi pink, my situation was similar although not identical to yours. i developed agoraphobia slowly over about 2 years and in that time my other half as he was then got a4 on 4 off job on really good money:yesyes: which meant i didnt have to worry about the fact i was not going to be able to forge a career for myself because of the way i felt:weep: but he had to do nights and his days were loooooong. he would regularaly work 14 hours when on shift and he was gone at 6.30 to be there for 7 am and he would aslop very very often do 5 or 6 days. in all this time i depended on him constantly so like yourself my days revolved around him and in some ways i was happy with this because we had money and i loved him and i saw no way out of my problem with the agoro, so i literally did NOTHING when he was at work, except like yourself houswork and organising things at home - we would even have to do shopping after he came in from work some times because i hadnt gone to the shops!!!!this did start to improve though but if i was going through a bad spell it would suffer again and i never got through my invisible barrier:lac:

now im not completely better i think for me it will be anm ongoing struggle because i have been avoiding anxiety/panic since i was a teenager so it has to be worked at constantly - but i relish the challenge now!!! and i have move forward because like you i recognised this was not good enough for me - i knew i had to be able to function at least to some degree independently again, as before id met him id had 5 years totally independant with no help at all after my mum had died, so to feel like this was a killer, and i know youve also coped with adversity before so to feel this dependent must hurt?

i think the cbt will help you alot. wha thappened to me to change me from not being able to cope and being able to do stuff alone and even when i felt bad was that he lost that really good job and he now works mon-fri. he earns alot less money but he is happier and i am happier, but he would never have given that job up because of the money even though it meant it had taken him down a different route than hed wanted to go. i know your other half likes his job and the money is good and like us i fdont htink you should give into your anxiety - i had to be alone on easters, christmases and new years and it totally ruined any social life he could have had becaus ehe worked weekends too:lac:

but i think if you know your OH is going to keep this job then you will have no option but to work on that deopendancy. i guess that when he is home you wan tto be with him all the time? he is your support and you are in love? but why not take the opportunity of him being around to actaully do stuff alone with himm at the other end of the phone/mobile? i know this will be hard especially as you dont see him for 2 weeks, but jus thtink of wha tit will do for you if you can recover yourself while hes away - you will find that you wont wan thim to quit his job youll prob get a job yourself, and beleive me it wont take long, small sucesses mean more than big ones - steady progress build a really strong foundation and a desire to keep going:yesyes: anyway pink i wish you all the best in your recoverya nd i know that very soon youlll be posting telling everyone what youve been up to alone:winks: :hugs: