So fed up with it

[bottleblond]

Hi Folks,

I'm at the end of my tether here and i have no idea what to do.

Next door to me lives the nastiest people i have ever came accross in my life. My son's life is a living nightmare at the moment and to be quite frank-so is mine.

The eldest boy next door (12) hates Ben with a passion, i have no idea why because Ben has been nothing but nice to him, giving him a loan of play station games, inviting him in to play but now the eldest next door won't let ben's friends (his brother) and a few others play with Ben. They have all turned nasty. Ben plays on his own in the back garden on his trampoline whilst his ex-friends are in their back garden,shouting over things i couldn't repeat on here, throwing stones over, sweety rappers, juice cartons, worst yet is a sewer drain lid.

I have spoke to the parents next door who insist their kids are doing no wrong.

I'll give you a quick example.. friday night i was watching my friends daughter over night as she had a night out, Ben and Kyra went out to play the next morning only to be told by next doors youngest (6) that he knew Ben and Kyra had been DOING SEX all night! WTF :shrug:

I don't know what else to do, if i go to the council or police i know it will just make everything worse.

Has anyone else been through anything similar, and if so can you please advise me what to do.

Sorry for the rant

Love Lisa
xxxxxx

[Hope 2]

Hey Lisa :D

Wot a bloody nightmare . Things like this get me real mad . How dare they eh and the parents , well I can't say wot I think without getting banned ! I wish I had something to say that could help you and your lad . Only thing I can think of ........... would it be and option to ask these kids next door .......... what exactly is their problem with your son ? Put them on the spot sort of thing ? Hopefully someone will have some advice for u soon xx

Take Care
Hope xx

[bottleblond]

already done that hun....they just chant at me, you know the type!!?

one of them urinated through my fence last night, right beside their back door! disgusting!!

thanks for replying hun!!


Lisa
xxxxxxxxxxx

[Pink Panic]

Hi Lisa,

Gawd what an awful time for you hun. Hugs for you and Ben :hugs:

Much as you don't want to go to the Police of Council i don't think don't really have any other options. These people sound absolutely horrible and that's putting it mildly. The authorities will have experience in dealing with cases like these.
A mate of mine went through something similar and the Council did help her. A big part of her not going to them initially was that she was scared of repercussions but that didn't happen after the authorities stepped in and warned them and things did improve.

All the best :hugs:

Pink
xxx

[kazzie]

Blondy:hugs:

I have to agree with Pink!!

Keep a diary of every nasty event time date etc:ohmy:

Perhaps a polite but firm letter to the parents warning them of your next course of action???

Poor Ben send him a big:hugs: from me

Kids can be little shits eh

Hope you get it sorted mate:hugs:

Kaz x x x:hugs:

[Pickle]

Hi Lisa :hugs: I dont know whether the people next door live in a council house or not but if they do, I'd suggest keeping a diary ie time and description of event - starting now.

Phone the council on Tuesday and ask to speak to the Tenancy Liason Officer for the area and explain the problem. The TLO will carry out an investigation without mentioning your name.

Most council tenants have a clause in their Tenancy Agreements stating that they, their families or visitors to the property, will not cause problems or nuisance to anyone else.

If this is proven, then the council are well within their rights to take the tenant to court and possibly evict them.

Please don't worry about contacting the local authority as they are used to these types of problems

Hope everything turns out ok

x

[diane07]

hi lisa,

why don't you have a word with the police hun and find out what they can do to help you, a friend of mine went through the same thing she ended up moving away as her kids became so scared. I'm certainly not saying you should move but she didn't seek help and things got so bad. Like pickle said the council will help you out, phone who you need to phone no-one should have to put up with that.

Good luck
Di xx

[Hope 2]

Hi Lisa :D

I have thought about you a lot , it flippin stinks this :mad: .
I have been in a sorta similar position and was too scared to do anything about it cos of any pay back from the delightful little cretins . I reckon they get off on feeling powerful . Hmmm if powerful means taunting and hassling a little lad and his fab mum then .. well :shrug: no ta .

Hope u find a way to sort this out hun it must be really tough .
Hugs to u an little un
Love Hope xx

[lesleya]

Hi Lisa
I really feel for you hun...it must be like having the neighbours from hell living next door to you.
I agree with everything pickle says you need to contact the council, and let them mediate for you, its part of their job.
Why should you and your little boy be treated in this way. Im sure if the shoe was on the other foot they'd be the first to report you.
You deserve peace and quiet, dont let them make your life miserable.
I really hope you get it sorted out. Please let us know how it goes.
xxxx:hugs: :hugs: :hugs:

[jodie]

hey lisa :hugs:

i already told you what i think lol

but allways there for you hun :hugs:

jodie xx

[Dying_Swan]

Hey Lisa.

I'm sorry you're going through all this.

When I was about 9 I had a similar experience. My parent's divorced and I moved with my mum to a new house, new city, new school.

The kids in the close where we lived were all about my age but all boys, and were pretty horrible. Having already had my family torn apart and moving away from my friends and school, I found it very hard to cope with.

They used to assemble in the street and chuck things at me. Never being one to show my vulnerability, I fought back. I'm not necessarily suggesting that, but I hurled everything back at them. I soon made new friends and they came and assisted me! That said, none of it was ever dangerous (from what I remember) - water pistols are a good one. Get him a huge super soaker and tell him to practice his aim.

My brother had a terrible time when he started a new secondary school, and was bullied like crazy. Until one day he hit back.

I'm not suggesting for one minute that Ben gets violent, but just that once children learn they aren't going to win, they sometimes back down. If he could just ignore them completely, they will probably get bored. Not easy for a little lad, I know.

Sometimes, it's good if the bullies come face to face with what they are doing. I went through a phase when I was 12 of being a real **** to one of my friends. I had no ability to empathise and just thought it was funny. Eventually, my mum found out and frog marched me round to her parents. When I saw the hurt I had caused, I never did it again. To this day I still feel terrible about it. She's still one of my best mates though :)

It's a shame the parents are so ignorant - if you can get them to see what their brats are doing, they should make them come and talk to you and Ben. Have you tried talking to the kids?

I think the idea of a polite letter to the parents is a good one. Failing that, I would contact the council, the school and possibly the police.

Good luck hun - I hope it gets sorted soon

[bottleblond]

Awwwwwwww thankyou all.

It's still going on but i will keep you updated!

Lisa
xxxxx

[thevoicewithinme]

Hi Lisa, firstly I really feel for both you and your son, have been there myself. My 10 year old, during the easter holidays was chased, then beaten up by boys 4 years older than him, and they threatened him that next time they saw him they wanted money or they would stab him, my boy was terrified. A lady brought him home, and told me what had happened, at first I hesitated about calling the police, but then seeing on the state my son was in, I phoned them. They came out immediately, and were very nice and very re-assuring, telling me that they would go speak to the boys and their parents and that if I got any come back whatsoever, all I had to do was call them. To cut a long story short, they came back and told me that they had told the other boys to stay away from my Karl and from my house. Unfortunately Karl, is now too afraid to go out and play, and spends his time here at home either indoors or out in the garden with his younger brothers, but I do keep encouraging him to try and go out, says she with agoraphobia!!!

I really do think that you should either phone the police, or the council, like others have said in most people's tenancies it states that they and their families must not cause a nuisance to others..and they will keep your identity protected too.

Best of luck hun...and a hug to you both.

Kaz

[bottleblond]

Hi Kaz

So sorry you son went through that....kids can be so damn evil!!

Trust me-my next step will also be the police if it continues. I had to speak to Bens teacher today as the other boy started pushing him around at play time, in the result Ben had to be let back into class early because he was crying. I did go next door to speak to the other boys mother (pfffft) but she wouldn't answer the door even though i knew she was in.

The school are keeping an eye on things there and if anything happens again here then i will talk to the police and see if they can do anything.

Thanks for your reply hun and take care

:bighug1:

Love Lisa
xxx

[milly jones]

hey lisa,

point me in the right direction and ill squirt them with me water pistol.

no seriously hun, keep ur chin up and go to the council. that sort of behaviour has to be logged an reported before it gets worse hun.

lisa u helped me loads and i dont have any other answers than the other posts, but were all behind u

big hug to lisa

mill xx

[bottleblond]

was at my kitchen window earlier washing my dishes when i noticed objects being thrown into my front garden. Went and had a look through the peep hole on my front door and saw next doors 6 and 8 year olds along with a friend picking litter and stones from their front garden and throwing it into mine, I called my friend who was the mother of the friend who was with them and she came round and made him clean it up, next doors boy decided to help untill SHE came out and tols him just to leave it. It was an absolute mess.

Just coz their garden resembles steptoes yard doesnt mean i want mine to be the same!

I have taken pics for the council as i'm defo going to report it.

Sorry for the rant

Lisa
xxx

[kazzie]

Blondy:hugs: :hugs: :hugs:

Nuff is Nuff mate:lac:

You so have to report this and soon:mad:

Kaz x x x:hugs:

[manmoor]

Lisa I sort it for you hun :yesyes: Black eyes and jelly noses is what they need :unsure: give me a few days till I eat some more weetabix :scared15: Seriously tho as Kazzie says enough is enough hun :hugs: :hugs: :hugs: xxxxx

[Lindalou64]

Aww Sorry Lisa Ya Going Thru This Crap But What U Said Take Pics Record Anything Its So Sad My Heart Aches For Ben As Im Sure It Does For You.....for That Parent Errrrrrrr ...we Are Childrens Role Models And She Such A Good Example.... Not!!!!!!!!....i Could Go On But I Think You Know What I Would Say About The Parent......hang In There Hun....your The Better Person...........love Ya..........linda Xxxx

[bottleblond]

I just feel so damn low at the moment that i can't seem to shake it off, i just feel flat and deflated.

I feel so damn sorry for ben and also so useless!!

Grrrrrrr!!

[Hope 2]

Hi Lisa :D

Flippin eck chick wot a nightmare for u and yr lad. I am not surprised you are feeling down with all that's going on. I bet sometime soon u will lose it and face this head on. I kinda take so much then..........watch out here I come ! You take it easy on yrself, you will get there when yr ready xx

bye for now
Luv Hope xx

[manmoor]

FOR LISA :bighug1: :bighug1: :bighug1: :bighug1: :bighug1: XXXXX

P.S. You know the kinda hugs these are now done ye....... :unsure:

[The Fool]

buy your son a mobile phone with a good video and voice recorder on it and tell him to record and tape everything they do then show it to there parents there is no way they can say there kids are inoccent then.

[kellie]

lisa have you considered getting cameras fitted onto your house. i know it may cost a little price but it will make them think twice about what they are doing if they know you have evidance.
keep reporting everything they do and get the police involved as well.
i reallly hope this is sorted for you soon.
big big hugs hun.

kellie.xxxxxxxx

[bottleblond]

pmsl....Aye mandy, i know EXACTLY what you mean lol.

Thanks folks :bighug1: i'm keeping a note of everything that happens then i'm going to report them to the councils neighbourhood responce team. My anxiety is through the roof and i panic every time Ben goes out the door, bless him though, he's trying to take it all in his stride.

I wish i could afford cameras but i'm afraid there's no chance of that, and i'm sure i'd have to have planning permission from the council to put them up too.

Thanks again folks!! i really appreciate all your support

Love Lisa
xxx

[Pink Panic]

Just sending you and your wee lad a hug Lisa. Hope things get better real soon.

:hugs: :hugs: :hugs: :hugs:

Pink
xxx

[bottleblond]

UPDATE........

Ben has been constantly beaten up by the neighbours from hell, yesterday one had him in a neck hold whilst the brothers and a couple of their friends battered into him :weep:

That's when i saw red and called in the police, now they ALL have had a formal police warning and have been told that the crimes that they are commiting are serious enough to warrent charges being pressed against them, and they have been assured that this WILL be the next move. NO chances, NO excuses, charged END OFF!!!

I hope this will be an end to it all but i very much doubt it.

watch this space........


Love Lisa
xxx

[lesleya]

Hi Lisa
Im so sorry your still going through this you must be exhausted by it all and it must be a total nightmare for you and your son. Your son sounds like a real star...he is so brave taking it all in his stride like that... you must be sooo proud of him.
Surely the council could either give you another place to live - or better still evict the family from hell and give you peace.
I truly hope this is the end of the trouble for you now that the police are involved.
Take care hun, hugs to you and ben xxx
:hugs: :hugs: :hugs:

[dawny]

lisa.....

flippin eck i feel so sorry for you and your wee lad....
well done for reporting them to the police, i know it could not have been easy for you.....if things get to bad for you, you can ask the council to move you. i know thats extreme and you probably think why should i move...but it is an option and these days the council do take it all seriously and have to make you priority.
lisa, have you reported it to the council as the police and council rarely communicate with each other, they probably wont know whats going on.

this can't be doing you any good whatsoever, poor gal,

my thoughts are with you lisa

dawny xxxxx

[popsy]

Im sorry i cant be any help, but just wanted to let you know im thinking of you and your son and sending you lots of supportive hugs. Really hope it gets sorted out for you asap, and that family get whats coming to them!!!!
People like that make me sick!!! :bighug1: :bighug1:

[milly jones]

hold in there lisa

big hugs millxxxxxx

[bottleblond]

Thanks ever so much for all your support and kind words folks.

It's not been the easiest of times but i have got good back up now from the police and a few others. We are not going to be the victims anymore and certainly not gonna take any more s**t lying down!!

Thanks again!!

Love Lisa
xxx

[lorac]

So sorry you have had so much bother Lisa, there are some horrible people around and you don't deserve all that. I really hope things get sorted for you very soon.

Love
Carol
xxxxxx

[manmoor]

Lisa I'll send our riot squad over and believe me they'd soon sort them out :winks: xxx

[dawny]

lisa, hope you are ok

thinking about you

dawny xxxxx

[bottleblond]

So far so good folks!!! :biggrin:

thanks millions to you all

Love Lisa
xxxx

[thevoicewithinme]

Hi Lisa,

Just wanted to let you know that I am thinking of you and your little boy. You did the right thing hon by phoning the police, it's not fair that you and your little boy have to go through this...remember I have been in a similar situation as I told you, so I do know where you are coming from.

Sending you both my best wishes and hoping things will calm down.


Kaz

[kazzie]

Thinking of you both Blondy:hugs: :hugs: :hugs:

Luv Kaz x x x:hugs:

[Lindalou64]

Hey Lisa Hope This All Came To An End Now For Yas .....wish Yas Well Lisa......linda Xxxx