Anxiety and Panic, A family curse ???????

[bluebell68]

Hi guys, i haven't posted for a while cos ive started to feel so much better and have found myself able to start getting back to my usually busy life but today has reminded me that anxiety is probably always gonna be a part of my life in some form or another..My daughter who left home recently has suffered from anxiety long ago, whilst at school but seemed to be doing so well for the last 4 or 5 years but today she contacted me after a whole night of panic attacks :weep: .... she is feeling so shaken up and just seems so fragile.. it breaks my heart...she has an important meeting at work tommoro and loads of prep to catch up on cos she felt so awful today that she had to take the day off.......i left work at lunch to see her and went back this evening but god i feel so useless....i soo wish i could just hug her and tell her everything is going to be ok like when she was little but anxiety just seems to run in our family like a curse! ...(i have other family members who suffer with it too).......i have always been really careful to hide my anxiety from my children and my daughter has only recently found out that i suffer with it too but i worry now that maybe her anxiety has been 'learned' from me somehow, or maybe its just hereditary,... i don't know, but i do know that i would do anything to take this burden from her, anything, but all i can do is support her and take care of her, which just doesn't seem enough. My other two daughters don't suffer from anxiety but one has inherited migraine from me which also runs in the family, so i feel guilty about that too :weep: ..i HATE HATE anxiety :mad: :mad: :mad: its so mean and cruel...........:weep:
For me, i can say... anxiety, do your worse and ill deal with it....but i wish i could tell it to LEAVE MY CHILD ALONE :mad: :weep: !!!!!
Hugs
Rachel

[popsy]

Awwww bluebell, your post could have been written by my mum!!! :flowers:
She has been an anxiety sufferer and her mother was too, i know she feels exactly the same way about me as you have said about your daughter, she blames herself etc... Yes, i must admit i do feel like ive been cursed with the family anxiety and i worry for my daughter (whos only 4 now) in the future! But i honestly have never even thought to blame my mum or anything, what does help me enormously is that she has been exactly where i am now and out of everyone gives me the most support, advice and guidance. She admits to feeling powerless and sometimes i feel guilty telling her how bad i feel cos i know she blames herself! I dont really know what im trying to say accept we are a family in exactly the same position as you and know how you feel! I know i might have inherited this anxiety from my mum and grandmother but i also know i have inherited their compassion for others and a great many other strengths i have come to realise i have.
It is wonderful to hear how close you and your daughter are (as me and my mum are) and the good and bad bonds that you share (jeez im welling up here!:hugs: ). Give each other strength, cling on to one another and it will pass. I dont think the majority of people have bonds as strong as you describe, could you therefore see the anxiety as a positive thing? No, me neither actually, but i know that mine has brought me and my mum soooo close and made me realise exactly how much i love her for being my mum!
Loads of Love :bighug1:
C x
PS dont think it is learned behaviour, my mum always hid her anxiety from me, until i became a sufferer i had no idea my mum was one too, in fact i was so in the dark regarding anxiety/pa's i didnt know what was happening to me for a good 6mths and hid it and believed i was slowley going mad.
Blame the genes not yourself!!!!! xxx