Progressive MS - please help

[veebee]

Hi

I've had a bit of a bad weekend and posted this morning about strange sensation in the backs of my legs/butt.

I've not had any replies and am worried that no-one has replied because they agree with me that they think I have progressive MS. I've been thinking about it all day today and when I was at the shops my legs felt shaky and I keep thinking that I'm going to collapse or go blind and be taken to hospital and be told that I'll be in a wheelchair for the rest of my life. I just can't cope with that thought.

I've seen a neurologist who says he doesn't think I have a progressive illness but I'm waiting on an MRI which he has arranged 'only for my peace of mind'. I'm just so sick of every day being a struggle and constantly turning this over in my mind. There is no escape from it and I am feeling so hopeless at the moment...I'm fighting with myself constantly but I just feel like I'm losing all the time.

[marie1974]

hi veebee please try to not worry as u make yourself worse, anxiety can really make you believe you are ill when u r not and i would really try keep busy and not giv yourself to much thinking time, and once u had the MRI and i comes clear which sure it will atleast u will no for sure in yr mind, hugs xx

[veebee]

Thanks Donna, I thought I was doing so well recently and this weekend everything has just gone downhill. Crying while typing this and I haven't cried in ages. Don't want to go back to square one again but just wonder how long this is going to go on for. I hate myself for being so damn pathetic.

[domino]

Hi , please do.,nt be so hard on yourself, one day at a time soon you will have the results and then take it from there. sending you hugs asnd wishing you well xx

[JennyW]

Hi Veebee. I've been down this route too. It's pants isn't it?

2 years ago I went down the MS route, really dont know why and where it came from :huh: but drove my GP round the bend with feelings of dizziness and funny feelings in my legs. So after googling my symptoms - Dr Google decided I had MS. Anyway GP referred me to a neurologist to "put my mind at rest" but I just kept thinking "he's referred me because he thinks I've got MS" - it drove me potty :wacko:

Anyway, saw a very nice neurologist who probably knew the minute I walked through the door that I was fine, but carried out some tests then said he would do a full MRI of my back and brain. Turned out I had a very "healthy brain" (in his words) :D but my tingly sensations was due to a slightly slipped old disc in my back.

The internet is great in so many ways but also very bad when we start checking out our symptoms, and I for one is guilty of that.

I'm sure you're just fine. The doctors carry out these tests, not because they think we need them, but to put our minds at rest.

[veebee]

Thanks Domino and Jenny for your replies - it really helps to have sane, rational advice, it has calmed me down a good bit!!

Jenny, do you mind if I ask you about your experience? How long did it take for your symptoms to go away? I've had mine for a wee while now and although it comes and godx I thought I would be free of it by now...but then maybe waiting for the MRI is keeping it all going.

[chalky]

Hi Veebee,

The MRI scan will hopefully give you the reassurance you need.
As anxious people,we have a great capacity for focusing on our problems both consciously and sub-consciously.
Reassure yourself that you are doing the right thing in having this test and that this will allow you to move onwards treating your Anxiety.
Best wishes,
Chalky

[breeze25]

Yes I have been there before down the MS route as they say, you can really drive youself insane with the feelings, it all started once when i got up and had really bad pins and needles in my leg, my brain forgot the fact that I had been sitting funny on the floor for 20 mins playing with my son, but sent me into the downward spiral, they I focused so much ont he area that made it 100 times worse.

Really feel for you, I just so wish that I had believed what I was told and saved the many months of thinkig no-one believed me or no-one can see the signs.

[itoldyouiwasill]

Hi

I've had a bit of a bad weekend and posted this morning about strange sensation in the backs of my legs/butt.

I've not had any replies and am worried that no-one has replied because they agree with me that they think I have progressive MS. I've been thinking about it all day today and when I was at the shops my legs felt shaky and I keep thinking that I'm going to collapse or go blind and be taken to hospital and be told that I'll be in a wheelchair for the rest of my life. I just can't cope with that thought.

I've seen a neurologist who says he doesn't think I have a progressive illness but I'm waiting on an MRI which he has arranged 'only for my peace of mind'. I'm just so sick of every day being a struggle and constantly turning this over in my mind. There is no escape from it and I am feeling so hopeless at the moment...I'm fighting with myself constantly but I just feel like I'm losing all the time.

There it is, that is the part of the health anxiety that is keeping you in the loop.

Not only are you convincing yourself that you are going to get an MS diagnosis you are also over catastrophising to the point where you picture the full extent of the illness and the devasting effect it will have on your life.

A word of warning, your CNS cannot tell the difference between reallity and a thought....to all intents and purposes your mind and body are already suffering from MS because you are convincing yourself of this.

Do not look into the future and do not give yourself the worst possible form of an illness you are very very unlikely to even have. All the while you are telling yourself it is MS your body will respond accordingly...this is a classic health anxiety trap and one you need to eacape from.

[JennyW]

Thanks Domino and Jenny for your replies - it really helps to have sane, rational advice, it has calmed me down a good bit!!

Jenny, do you mind if I ask you about your experience? How long did it take for your symptoms to go away? I've had mine for a wee while now and although it comes and godx I thought I would be free of it by now...but then maybe waiting for the MRI is keeping it all going.

Hi veebee. The dizziness, funny heady sensations lasted a couple of months, say 3, then just went away on their own - probably went once I realised my brain scan was clear. The disc issue in my back (and also in my neck), gave me the tingling, odd sensations in my legs, which was helped by physio, however I still get it occasionally in my left leg. But I remember whilst at the neurologist's office, when he did some reflex tests, he said I had a sluggish ankle reflex - this is probably the reason for the tingling. However as I was given the "all clear" and I wasn't suffering from MS, I have pretty much relaxed about the whole thing.

As I said earlier though, I really don't know where the MS came from - well I do, - google. I bet neurologists see tons of people walking through their door with our symptoms because we diagnose ourselves :wacko: I even told him that I was worried I had MS - he asked "why on earth would you think that"? See, they know what they are looking for and are experts in this field. I sometimes wish I didn't have access to a computer - I'm sure I'd be a lot more relaxed because I wouldn't be checking my symptoms.