Bill
20-05-08, 04:01
We find a job we love. We can't wait to get up and out that door to start working. As the years go by we then meet a partner, we find a house and settle down. The responsibilities are increased but we still love our job. Then we get promotion, our workload doubles then triples. We get home feeling tired and exhausted but still we love our job!
Our partner turns out to be unsupportive and arguments break out. They begin to belittle us making us feel we don't pull our weight.
Finances become a worry. We worry about ending up on the street or losing the flat or house.
We suffer a family loss and we feel lost without them. We feel so empty and alone.
One day on our journey to work we have a minor accident but it feels too much to cope with.
Then one day we start feeling "odd". We feel we can't breathe, start tingling and feel we're going to collapse or worse! It scares us because we don't know what's wrong with us or why it's happened but we still love our job!
However, we start worrying why we felt so odd and each morning we wake, it becomes harder to get up. We worry that what we felt will return and sure enough, as we go down the road, those same feelings re-surface.
By the time we reach the office, eveything is spinning. The feelings we're having make us think there must be something seriously wrong with us and all day at the office we can't stop shaking, feeling trembly and worry what if we collapse in front of everyone.
We feel trapped and we can't wait to get away from the office and the job we enjoyed so much. It terrifies us what's happening to us so on our way home we see the doctor because we're starting to think the symptoms are an indications of something life threatening.
He tells us it's just anxiety and prescribes medication but still we don't understand why or where it came from. We get home thinking this medication is the "magic cure" and all will get back to normal so next morning we wake in a sweat and trembling so rush downstairs for the medication. However, the medication makes us feel more ill with nausea but we've been told it'll wear off.
We get off to work but though we feel less anxious, the feelings are still there. After another bad day, the days get worse until we find ourselves back at the doctors who prescribe a new tablet. When this too doesn't work, the dose is increased until this medication also has to be changed.
The panicky feelings still don't go and we keep feeling trapped but now not only in the office. We start to become afraid to even step out of the door so eventually we have to give up our job we loved.
The panicky feelings still don't ease though. We still wake in a sweat and trembling even though we don't have to get up for work. The longer we lay there though, the worse we feel. We're convinced we're really ill and start looking up all the symptoms. We just feel so ill All the time throughout the day.
We start thinking we're pathetic, no good and begin to hate ourself for not being as capable as others and for losing our job. We feel we've let our partner down and we're now useless to them.
One day we start scratching ourselves until the cuts get deeper. We try to stop but we hate ourselves so much for what we've become that we find relief in doing it but it becomes a ritual.
We start thinking we have no life and all hope has gone so we become suicidal. We start taking overdoses because we feel so alone, that no one cares and our lives aren't worth living.
The doctor is helpless to prevent our spiral so we start seeing a psychiatrist who refers us to a psychologist who then shows how our spiral began and the light at the end of the tunnel. We start seeing a therapist who helps us to tackle our "thoughts" so we can help ourselves back on our feet.
We begin to grow in confidence again and after a long time out of work, we're able to get back to where we started but reminding ourselves of our limitations and not to become overstressed.
The above is based on my experiences but not an actual account.
There are always causes and there is always a way to get better even when we can't see the causes or the way to get to better.:hugs:
Our partner turns out to be unsupportive and arguments break out. They begin to belittle us making us feel we don't pull our weight.
Finances become a worry. We worry about ending up on the street or losing the flat or house.
We suffer a family loss and we feel lost without them. We feel so empty and alone.
One day on our journey to work we have a minor accident but it feels too much to cope with.
Then one day we start feeling "odd". We feel we can't breathe, start tingling and feel we're going to collapse or worse! It scares us because we don't know what's wrong with us or why it's happened but we still love our job!
However, we start worrying why we felt so odd and each morning we wake, it becomes harder to get up. We worry that what we felt will return and sure enough, as we go down the road, those same feelings re-surface.
By the time we reach the office, eveything is spinning. The feelings we're having make us think there must be something seriously wrong with us and all day at the office we can't stop shaking, feeling trembly and worry what if we collapse in front of everyone.
We feel trapped and we can't wait to get away from the office and the job we enjoyed so much. It terrifies us what's happening to us so on our way home we see the doctor because we're starting to think the symptoms are an indications of something life threatening.
He tells us it's just anxiety and prescribes medication but still we don't understand why or where it came from. We get home thinking this medication is the "magic cure" and all will get back to normal so next morning we wake in a sweat and trembling so rush downstairs for the medication. However, the medication makes us feel more ill with nausea but we've been told it'll wear off.
We get off to work but though we feel less anxious, the feelings are still there. After another bad day, the days get worse until we find ourselves back at the doctors who prescribe a new tablet. When this too doesn't work, the dose is increased until this medication also has to be changed.
The panicky feelings still don't go and we keep feeling trapped but now not only in the office. We start to become afraid to even step out of the door so eventually we have to give up our job we loved.
The panicky feelings still don't ease though. We still wake in a sweat and trembling even though we don't have to get up for work. The longer we lay there though, the worse we feel. We're convinced we're really ill and start looking up all the symptoms. We just feel so ill All the time throughout the day.
We start thinking we're pathetic, no good and begin to hate ourself for not being as capable as others and for losing our job. We feel we've let our partner down and we're now useless to them.
One day we start scratching ourselves until the cuts get deeper. We try to stop but we hate ourselves so much for what we've become that we find relief in doing it but it becomes a ritual.
We start thinking we have no life and all hope has gone so we become suicidal. We start taking overdoses because we feel so alone, that no one cares and our lives aren't worth living.
The doctor is helpless to prevent our spiral so we start seeing a psychiatrist who refers us to a psychologist who then shows how our spiral began and the light at the end of the tunnel. We start seeing a therapist who helps us to tackle our "thoughts" so we can help ourselves back on our feet.
We begin to grow in confidence again and after a long time out of work, we're able to get back to where we started but reminding ourselves of our limitations and not to become overstressed.
The above is based on my experiences but not an actual account.
There are always causes and there is always a way to get better even when we can't see the causes or the way to get to better.:hugs: