Im New

[Brooksie]

Hi

I have decided to post and join this website, I have had panic attacks for over 16 years all be it with a bit of a break where I felt I had overcome them. Now they're back (even though I keep telling myself it's lack of vit B or heart or brain!!) I know now while I type this that if it was anything else,
1) The doctor would've noticed on 1 of many blood tests I have had.
2) proberbly would've fainted by know
3) I wouldn't feel ok in the morning or evening when i'm relaxed!!

I can't work out whats causing this but it is incredibly real I actually think I am going to faint,die,never get over this, not going to get home in one piece, and so on....

I dont think my heart is beating that fast, it is higher than normal and if i can concentrate enough with deep breathing I start to relax, but as soon as my mind wonders for a split second, I'm back to where I started! I have a job in the public eye which comes with it's own pressure, it's a job I wanted since I was a kid I pretend I dont feel the pressure but I know I do. A lot of my panic happens at work which really does get in the way. I don't want to have a conversation with anyone, I just want to be left alone when i am in an attack. The thought of going out at night and socialising fills me with dread, and when I'm in a hotel waiting to meet up with people or wait for my taxi I will normally panic! When I'm there though I normally have a good night, a glass of red wine normally helps!

I have a wonderful wife (she doesn't understand this or really believe in it ..but when you try to explain it to someone it does sound a bit wierd!!) and 3 beautiful children. I have nothing to fear, I have always had a bit of a fear of dying or gettin cancer/aids/brain tumours and so on...not all at the same
time of course..:unsure:

Maybe its a sense of what I could lose, I don't know. Doctor has referred me to counseller so I will see what that brings. She also gave me beta blockers but didnt really think they made a difference, is anyone else on them??

Thanks for reading
B

[Lilith1980]

Hi Brooksie

Welcome to NMP :)

I think counselling is a good step. It certainly helped me, see how you get on with it. I cant comment on beta blockers though as I havent had meds.

It is very hard for people to understand what's going on inside our heads if they have never suffered with anx. But I'm sure once you have a base from which to work, which will hopefully come from your counselling sessions, your wife can support you with this :)

Jo xxxxx

[kellie]

hiya Brooksie :welcome: to nmp its lovely to have you here :biggrin: . you will get lots of support/advice/reasurance and make some great friends along the way. keep posting with what ever is on your mind and we will help as much as we can. counselling and cbt may be very helpful to you.
love and happiness
take care.

kellie.xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

[Patty]

Hi Brooksie,:)

:welcome: to NMP. It's great that you've joined. There is so much information & help here. I have panic disorder & social anxiety which started at work. The real feelings you talk about -

"I can't work out whats causing this but it is incredibly real I actually think I am going to faint,die,never get over this, not going to get home in one piece, and so on...."

This is the way that I feel with it as well. I hope the counselling goes well for you. Take care. :D

[gary_2.0]

Welcome to the forum Brooksie.

Explaining quite how bad a panic attack can be to someone who's never had one can be incredibly difficult. Like most things in life to truly understand something we have to experience it first hand. Some things just don't translate well enough.

I'm certain you'll find this site useful. The people here are incredibly friendly. We all understand how tough it can be and you're among friends here mate :)

[Lindalou64]

Hello Brokksie And Welcome..i Wish Ya Well..........linda

[Southern_Belle]

Hi Brooksie,

Welcome to the site. You will find that others understand what you are feeling here. I also think that counseling will help and perhaps you can find what is causing the panic attacks. The fact that you already think that you might lose all of your blessings is a clue. I personally believe that those of us with anxiety are more sensitive than others such as you know how good you have it whereas others might not realize it. Good luck with your counseling and I know this site will help.

Hugs,

Laura