View Full Version : We are stonger
Hi all,
Just wondered what your thoughts were on this!:unsure:
I may sound deluded :huh: - but I have coped with anxiety and agraphobia and have times when I feel great and times when I don't! I have mananged to bring up my family and hold down a full time job however bad I have felt at times.
One thing I have been noticing recently in general conversation with friends and colleauges is they are so quick to to be so negative. If they feel slightly unwell it is a drama - if they feel stressed it is a dilemma and they all come to me with their woes! There are a few close friends and family who know of the issues I have at times, as I always try to just deal with it and get on. For all the down sides I do believe, these sometimes horrible things, make you stronger.
Does anyone agree?
Denise
Facing and coming through adversity makes a person stronger because their confidence grows as a result. With every hurdle we tackle, we prove to ourselves how capable we really are and if we remind ourselves of the things we've achieved, we create more self-belief.
The lower we fall, the stronger we become when we come through the other side. Confidence is built through facing challenges.
They always say someone is worse off or better off than ourselves because it is all relative to our individual circumstances but in reality life just throws different obstacles to different people. My mother often says "Someone up there just loves to test us!"
We can either give up and sink or attempt to learn to swim but if we achieve our goal in reaching the coast, we become a more confident able swimmer for when the next storm arrives to try to sink us but with each storm we survive, we grow in confidence and as a person.
A wise old man is only a wise old man because of his experiences he's lived through and survived. If we're not set challenges, we never learn how to cope. Life is all about challenges and risk but if we're not prepared to confront our challenges and take risk, we never grow strong and remain living in fear.
People turn to people like yourself with their problems because of your sensitive caring nature, and although they'll never admit it, they also turn to you because to them you appear strong even though you may not feel or believe it. However, in reality you Are strong because of all the challenges you've faced and conquered but often only others can see your inner strength.........but I think your case you realise how strong you are because you have the self belief we all need!:hugs:
xBettyBoopx
28-05-08, 03:39
Hi Denise
I'm glad that you feel stronger:) :)
Unfortunately I am weaker by the day! Beaten down by panic attacks for 32 years, I too kept my jobs even though going was hell, but being made redundant 4 times was too much. Worse anxiety/panic looking for another job, then starting being the new person. I am now physcially unwell too (for past 2 half years), living on incap benefit, all my friends have disappeared, and family too. I am alone in a prison. Sorry if that sounds negative but..........how much worse can it get?:weep: :weep:
To sum up, I am weaker now mentally and physcially, so NO I don't think that these things make us stronger, well not me anyways.
Whoever said "those things that don't kill us, makes us stronger" has never met me:lac: :whistles: :scared15: :ohmy: :mad:
Elspeth
Dr Kong, AKA Wayne
28-05-08, 07:36
Facing and coming through adversity makes a person stronger because their confidence grows as a result. With every hurdle we tackle, we prove to ourselves how capable we really are and if we remind ourselves of the things we've achieved, we create more self-belief.
The lower we fall, the stronger we become when we come through the other side. Confidence is built through facing challenges.
They always say someone is worse off or better off than ourselves because it is all relative to our individual circumstances but in reality life just throws different obstacles to different people. My mother often says "Someone up there just loves to test us!"
We can either give up and sink or attempt to learn to swim but if we achieve our goal in reaching the coast, we become a more confident able swimmer for when the next storm arrives to try to sink us but with each storm we survive, we grow in confidence and as a person.
A wise old man is only a wise old man because of his experiences he's lived through and survived. If we're not set challenges, we never learn how to cope. Life is all about challenges and risk but if we're not prepared to confront our challenges and take risk, we never grow strong and remain living in fear.
People turn to people like yourself with their problems because of your sensitive caring nature, and although they'll never admit it, they also turn to you because to them you appear strong even though you may not feel or believe it. However, in reality you Are strong because of all the challenges you've faced and conquered but often only others can see your inner strength.........but I think your case you realise how strong you are because you have the self belief we all need!:hugs:
What a great post Bill,
My Wife and I often say "someone is testing us" we have had such bad luck recently. Not just with what I suffer from, but money problems to, because of my current health situation I can't work.
Take care,
Wayne
Thank you all for your replies:)
Elspeth - I pondered about this post for a long time as there are times when I feel anything but strong!!! But on the whole I try to think the days that are bad will pass and there will be days that are better. For people who do not suffer - any minor thing is a huge issue and they find it hard to cope! I think a day in the life of someone that does suffer would soon make them realise!
Please try to keep going! you have managed this for 32 years and if we were having an awards ceremony you would be up for an OSCAR!! If old friends have disapeared are there possabilies of new friends. I have a group where I live called WHIST - womens help in south tyneside they not only offer help for sufferes but also alternative therapies and groups that offer new challenges! Always hard to start - but so rewarding:hugs:
Bill your perception and thoughts are so strong and coherent! have you ever thought of becoming a therapist! Experiance of suffering as a sufferer or a carer is so important to help others. Your comments are alway so reassuring and concise:shades:
Wayne - the 'tests' at times seem so ongoing! keep at it:)
Through all the adversity I sometimes think we do not realise the strength we DO have that has kept us going xx:noangel:
Big hugs to us all that we keep battling:hugs: :hugs:
Ditto , and well stipulated .......:shades: :shades:
Through all the adversity I sometimes think we do not realise the strength we DO have that has kept us going xx:noangel:
We overlook our strengths because we focus on our negatives, always expecting us to be perfect and punishing ourselves for natural imperfections. I doubt that many on here considers themselves strong but instead will tell you how weak and insignificant they are when the truth is entirely the opposite.
We don't think about our achievements, we focus on what we consider ourselves to be failings and if people run us down, it just reinforces our beliefs of ourselves because we've been so used to being belittled in the past so we expect the same treatment from others in the present.
We are in reality very strong because we keep going despite how anxious we're feeling. We never give up.
I could list a whole load of fine qualities and attributes that an anxiety sufferer has which I have done in previous posts but if you ask an individual if they are true of them, they'll not agree but it would be plainly obvious to others that all the statements would be true. It's just the individual can't see them.
It is often said by an anxiety sufferer "I'm not used to receiving compliments" and this is because people have always told them they're no good so now they can't see the abundant goodness they possess which is very sad because in truth there is no finer person than an anxiety sufferer. Why? Because they "worry" so they care and think of others and they're sensitive so are full of compassion and empathy. I could go on.....
Strength is another fine quailty too often overlooked because anxiety makes a sufferer "feel" weak when in truth they're not. Only when we come out at the other side and look back do we see our hidden strength but I for one can see it in many people on here but I know they won't believe me....yet.:hugs:
Oh they will Bill x
Your words of wisdom hit home without you realising!!
Denise x
I have coped with anxiety and agraphobia and have times when I feel great and times when I don't! I have mananged to bring up my family and hold down a full time job however bad I have felt at times.
Looking over your posts, every one displays courage. When you've hit a bad spell, you've tapped into all you've learned and together with your strength, you've pulled yourself through.
I believe your worst is behind you and from now on you will go from strength to strength providing you never forget that you've been there but you survived. Whatever obstacles you face in the future, you know you have the knowledge and strength to overcome them. I have total faith in you and no doubts whatsoever that you Will.:hugs:
:hugs: Many thanks Bill!!!
My road to recovery at times is so strong and at times it wavers - as it does with us all!!
There are periods I feel I am coming through the other side and then Whoosh!! I feel my BIGGEST fear - (which consequently you have touched on!) - is the fear that I will revert back to when this was at its worst!!!!!
And again as you rightly pointed out - I know I have the techniques to take the blips, ride them as best I can with the knowledge it will get better!
Thats is the stength I was talking about - we all have it but do not realise that these little battles are huge victories at times! We are quick to point out what we do not do or deal with - but fail to mention the strength and courage it takes to keep going, dust ourselves off and strive forward!!:yahoo:
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