View Full Version : does anyone here have a fear of travelling
charmain24
30-05-08, 22:53
i have a fear of travelling it takes alot for me to get to wales to see my parents which is 2 and a half hours from here. i would like to go somewhere else for a holiday but am scared of being too far from home. and i have a feeling of being trapped when i get on a motorway has anyone here conquered the travelling thing and if so could you give me any advice. i feel like i am ruining my husband and kids lives by not being able to travel xxx
Hi charmain24
A quick an easy way to do it is to carry some Diazepam. You don't even have to take any. Just knowing that you have them handy is enough to give you the confidence to travel. And if you did panic, the Diazepam are there to kill the panic. I know it's a crutch, but if it gets you out, then all the better.
Tom
Hi, your thread could have been me writing it!!!! Please feel free to read any or all of my previous threads & you will see that I DO no exactly how you feel!!!! I don't like to be too far away from home either and I am not good on the motorway for the exact same reasons as you. I also hate flying as I do not like feeling trapped on an airoplane.
Do I have any tips???? Just keep on doing it no matter how hard it is. Take lots of things to keep your mind occupied, practise your deep breathing before you go so you can do it while travelling, and keep talking to yourself with lots of kind words & lots of encouragement & praise, just as you would do for any friend or family.
We are going on the motorway for 3hrs in 4 wks to travel to our destination for a wks holiday. I just keep on doing it even though I struggle, because I know that if I stop, I will never do it again.
We were going to go on a long haul flight again this year, I have done that 3x since I have been like this, but this year I really just did not want to face it. So we are booked for next year & I feel so much better that I have over a year to get myself on that plane.
Just remember you are not alone, so next time you are travelling on the motorway, remember that & that might help ease the anxiety a little.
Please feel free to PM me anytime.
charmain24
31-05-08, 23:00
thanks for your advice guys its much appreciated. i do try my best to travel wales is all country side so i feel anxious but i know i can turn around if it got too much my husband wants to go to devon which is a 4 hour drive and i would love to go but i know i would get in a right state just booking it. i think you are very brave panicdiva getting on a plane i would love to do that but i know i just ay got it in me to do it. xxxx
I believe that we all have it in us ....... just that more often than not we can't find the strength, but when we do, it is a great feeling of achievement. Have you tried EFT, I have found this to be very helpful ...
Im glad i came across your post because i cant travel either. I get totally freaked out if im too far away from my house, my "safe place". I met my boyfriend online nearly a year ago and he only lives an hour away from me but i hardly ever go to his place. I have just found out now that all his family are telling him to finish with me because they fear im holding him back what with me not being able to go anywhere. This got me so upset as i dont want to be like this. I used to absolutely love travelling and would often go and visit my sister 12 hours away in Scotland. What do you feel like when you travel? My chest gets tight and i find it so hard to breath. The strange thing is though, i feel a lot better in the back of a car than i do in the front but ive no idea why:shrug:
Its a hard one but what i found helped me is to do the journey in stages, i go on google maps and work out every stage of the journey, it helps me get there and back, also i learnt how to admire each stage, so say you're in wales admire each place you go through, i found by doing this each time, the fear of travelling has begun to leave me again and has been replaced by a sense of excitement, i had to do a four hour journey back in feb to see my sons passing out parade in the army, the pressure i felt was unbelievable, but do you know the thought of doing the journey is always worse than actually doing it.
di xx
Charmaine, I feel exactly the same as you. I used to love travelling, but don't like it any more. The last time I flew was to Kefalonia 2 years ago and it was brilliant. I really want to go to Greece in August for a week, but am scared to go. I need to pluck up the courage. Home is my safe place. When I'm away from home, I worry I might have a panic attack and then want to get home. I've had this for years and hate it. I get the trapped feeling too.
Nicki
xx
Charmaine, I feel exactly the same as you. I used to love travelling, but don't like it any more. The last time I flew was to Kefalonia 2 years ago and it was brilliant. I really want to go to Greece in August for a week, but am scared to go. I need to pluck up the courage. Home is my safe place. When I'm away from home, I worry I might have a panic attack and then want to get home. I've had this for years and hate it. I get the trapped feeling too.
Nicki
xx
Hi all, I dont like travelling either but more as im a control freak, I can go any distance driving if its me doing the driving, hate hubby driving and scared of a coach in case the driver isnt careful enough etc. I am petrified of flying but ive just come back from Tunisia which is a 3 hour flight and im so proud of myself, I cant do it without alcohol though but hey if thats what helps then fine. I refused to go anywhere other than the channel islands to see family for years as I was so scared, it was only a 45 min flight there and I was still scared to death. It got to the stage where the kids were begging me to go abroad and hubby has always wanted to travel, at the end of the day my reasons for not flying was because I felt protective of my kids, they now are teens and can say that they are prepared to take the risk so how can I stop them? I also felt I was holding hubby back, I cant let him live his life not doing something he wants to do, what if he got to 80 and never went anywhere cus of me? thats not right..
I started off last year going away with friends, to make me braver and it did work to a degree, I was still scared sh it less but had to try and make an effort, we went on a 2 and a bit hr flight to portugal, this yr we did 3 hours, im hoping in the next few years to manage long haul lol.
I do understand but please dont anyone let anyone else suffer for life due to your own fears, easier said than done I know x
YES, I can't stand travelling! I feel ill on most journeys. When I went on holiday we were stuck in jams on the motorway for a while and I felt sure I was going to be sick there and then. The same applies to when stuck on a train. As I have to travel so far to work, it's presented a real problem for me. I find chilled water and polo mints do help (for a while) so give those a try :)
Hiya
I used to suffer really badly from this but have managed this year to go to my sister's wedding in Scotland (I'm in London) and also to go to the Lake District for a long weekend. Im managing to do some of the driving myself now. Have been driving down the motorway to the coast to take my daughter to stay at her dads (about 1.5 hours) and drive to a wedding in the New Forest. Havent done motorways on my own yet (always have someone else in the car who can drive if I freak out) but I will soon!!
I felt exactly the same as you - fear of being trapped in the middle of nowhere. I dont have a foolproof plan to conquer it but when i started to try it, my bf would drive and we would leave v v early in the morning so I could sleep most of the way. Part of my coping with it was knowing that in the past, I have panicked/been anx for hours on end and it hasnt killed me so I figured that even it i panicked for the whole journey, I would still reach the other end and be fine!
One m-way junction to the next is not as long as you think it is and so you will never have to wait too long before you can turn off. The hard shoulder is always there if you need to stop and get some air or throw up or whatever and even in my worst imaginings, an ambulance could always get to me.
I'm still not keen on traffic jams on m-ways but if its a really bad one, we get off the next junction and find another way and generally you dont get total gridlock, the traffic keeps moving so you are always getting closer to being able to get off the road if you need to, even if its very slowly! My dippy brain tells me that if that was to happen, I would just get out and walk down the hard shoulder so I have something to do and wait for the car to catch me up!
I do silly things like always make sure my breakdown cover is up to date in case anything was to happen to the car and tell myself that if we had to turn round, then every minute we travel is one minute closer to home/safety and that makes the journey more bearable. You could try an audio book or something similar to keep you occupied?
What got me thru the first time was firstly telling myself that the stupid adrenaline rush was there cos my body was having an absurd reaction to being nervous and thought I was going to lose and arm or a leg and that was absolutely not going to happen so it was all plain silly!! Secondly, the first journey I tried was the Lakes and the seoncd one was Scotland and by doing the worst possible journeys first, it made everything else seem easier to handle. And lastly, I cried most of the way. Sounds odd but it really helped to be able to admit that I was terrified and scared of messing up everyones holiday etc cos my anx is so much worse when Im holding it all in pretending its all fine.
I never thought I would leave London again, let alone see the sea or another country but I have - just! You will get through it
gabby xx
Hi there,
I too am very fearful of travelling, especially to places i don;t know or those places that are far away, more than an hour. Basically the fear can be categorised as agoraphobia. I have been very limited in my travel in the past, particularly in the past 3 years. I am in Australia. my partner and i were looking forward to a dream trip up north to nth Queensland, three years ago. We had to take two flights and by the time i had to go to sleep, at our final s**tty destination, i flipped. i had no chill pills with me at all, and i had to go to the local hospital for pills. The intense fear from this panic attack is the most worst i have ever felt in the 10 years i have had panic attacks, i didn't even recognise where i was, couldn't eat, couldn't trust anyone, or my surroundings. The panic state really lasted a good day or so, and i made my parnter and i get on the plane back home the very next day.
Since this aweful experience i have not been to a new destination again nor on a plane, but i hate it, as i was a person who used to love travelling.
Seeing new places, etc. However in light of this, in the past year or so, i have really improved on new meds, and am willing to try to go to places and do things i have forgot how to do.
I have a saying that fits well, and maybe you too can adopt this one.
I AM LEARNING TO TRAVEL! As a child we wanted to learn how to do things, and if you can train the brain into thinking that you are learning, you will then reward your achievements with self esteem everytime you take on something new in regard to travel. If that makes sense.
Remember to also talk loud to yourself. Years ago i did, and have just rediscovered the magic of this trick. Hearing your own voice outside of your head, can be quite reassuring. It breaks the endless cycling thoughts in your head.
Also don't run away from a panic attack, stop and let it take over your body. Andrenalin takes about 3 minutes to peak in your body and leave. It took me 7 years to learn how to let it wave over you, but once you do learn this trick, you will then feel more self empowerment and also accept that you can live with them, even though they are the most horriblest mental tricks of the mind.
I could keep going on and on, but just keep persisting, as we only have one chance in life and that too is something i keep telling myself. feel free to private message me if you wish!
Take care L x
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Veronica H
04-09-08, 13:24
Hi Everyone
Just reading these posts makes me tense up, because although I have made a lot of progress I still find travel in the car the most challenging. I think it is because of the noise, being enclosed and all familiar things disappearing at speed is just too much for sensitized nerves to cope with all at once. I practiced Dr Weekes techniques on my trip to the coast this weekend (see success story forum) but I know that I have to keep getting in the car no matter what, and I must not leave a big gap between doing so, because I could quite easily give it a miss!
Veronica
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