View Full Version : Exhausted and anxious
Hello there I have been reading the sucess posts to give me some encouragement as I have been spiralling out of control over the past few months and could really do with some encouragement and a big kick up the bum to stop wallowing and actually believe in myself (a hard thing to do as I'm sure you all know)
Unfortunately since Christmas my anxiety has gone from bad to worse as initially it was about thoughts but now it's moved onto physical things such as fear of noises and shadows. I thought about tinitus for so long that now I have it which has completely jolted my confidence.
After a lengthy battle it seems that I am due to get the support that I need from a CBT therapsit and have found a phobia self help group to go to, so is at least a positive step. The main thing is that I am so exhausted that I really don't know whats going on anymore and don't really know where to start in the mean time - the doctor has given me cytalopram (20mg) but after a month there seem to be no improvements and she's suggesting I increase the dose which I am scared of due to the initial increase in anxiety it could cause.
I am more and more aware that my performance at work is getting worse and I feel teary all of the time - I really don't know how to cope anymore. i fear for taking time off in case it makes me worse being on my own etc.
My life has changed so much from me being a sociable person who enoys dancing and having fun to someone who is scared of just about everything. I so desparetely want my life back but am scared that I do not have the strength or ability to change my thought process. I suppose I am such a low mess that I really need somewhere to start.
Thanks Helen
Hiya Helen,
Welcome to the site.:D
I'm sorry to here your having such a hard time at the moment, i know it's hard to get things back on track but it can be done dont give up hope you will get better.
As for CBT i'm in the middle of a free course i got from No Panic the offer it to all their members and it's only £10 per year i've found it very helpful.
Here's the link if you want to have a look into it...
www.nopanic.org.uk
Good Luck Helen
Keep your chin up mate you can turn this around.
Take care
Maxine
Hi Helen
Welcome aboard :D. Sorry to hear things aren't that great at the moment. As Maxine said you will get back on track even though at the moment you don't probably feel that way. You'll certainly get plenty of help and support from everyone on this site.
Take care
Tracy
x
Helen ,
You're doing well to still be in full time employment with raging acute anxiety.
I'd give the citalopram another couple of weeks as for some it only kicks in about at a month/ 6 weeks.
I'm glad to hear you're getting CBT arranged.
First Steps : First Steps to overcoming Panic and Anxiety (http://www.nomorepanic.co.uk/showthread.php?t=942)
If there is anything you need specific help with do let us know.
Meg
www.anxietymanagementltd.com
Watch your thoughts, they become your words...
Watch your words, they become your actions... Watch your actions, they become your habits... Watch your habits, they become your character... Watch your character, it becomes your destiny...
Hi Helen.
I was in a pretty similar condition last year before starting a course of CBT: my world felt more and more enclosed -- everything made me anxious. The CBT, however, really, really helped (far more than the Prozac I was prescribed.) I also didn't know where to begin, but from talking it over with the counsellor we developed a kind of plan of action to get me started.
Good luck :)
Henry
hi pea,
sorry to hear you have been so low, i was on citrolapram on and off for years, it does take about 6 weeks to kick in normally the doc did the same with me at first increased it then i went back down to 20mg after about 6 months, and even when i stopped taking it i had no real bad withdrawls,
I think you are doing a lot to help yourself so be proud, and try to keep positive you will get through this, i would try and stick it at wotk as long as u feel able to cope i think having a daily routine helps a lot, any way i do hope you feel better soon you will get loads of help and support on this site dont be affraid to ask there are some great people in here always there to answer you take care xxx
kairen x
Thanks for all your kind responses.
My main concern is that I really can't think of anything but this anxiety and over the past 2 days I have started experiencing a really tight chest too which has upset me more as it is a big change to me!
With a constant chest pain and fear of everything I just can't work out how to think of anything else! I keep saying that I am doing well but this constant panick state is exhausting and scary and keeps knocking me back. All I want to do is cry and cry nomatter wheather i am at home or at work. Perhaps I am just feeling sorry for myself but I am so trapped within my anxiety and need other things to occupy me yet with everything making me anxious where do i start?? I know the therapy is as good a place as any and I know a quick fix is out of the question but some happy thought treats would be fab! Little snippets to make me feel happy. The thing is when I think of nice things I instantly think of them with shadows on - blimey this is all so very confusing!
Best wishes to you all, H x
Dear Pea,
It is completely usual for acute anxiety to be all consuming and for you to be hanging onto every slight twinge and pain and symptom.
Please do cry as much as you need to - mayb enot at work but if you want to cry every day please do - its releasing pent up emotions, frustrations and self pity and if you keep it all in long term it will emerge as panic or anxiety.
You start at the beginning by looking and doing something about your basic functions food, rest, exercise, relaxation and follow the ideas in the First Steps link I sent you like writing it all down.
You are doing well as you already recognise that it is your thoughts that are causing many of your issues and that distraction is helpful.
You have also found a support group to go to and sorted yourself out some CBT so in the great scheme of things you're preparing for some good real progress.
Meg
www.anxietymanagementltd.com
Watch your thoughts, they become your words...
Watch your words, they become your actions... Watch your actions, they become your habits... Watch your habits, they become your character... Watch your character, it becomes your destiny...
Hi H
Sorry to here that you are having a blip at the moment. Just remember that its the thoughts that are doing it too you at the moment. The mind is a powerful thing, trust me I am an expert in not letting myself heal!! Like Meg says you recognise why you are getting the anxiety but it takes hard work and determination to change your thought patterns. Try to keep positive and watch things that make you happy or read a book. I would keep at work to as I would imagine it does distract you to some degree and it keeps things fairly normal ish..
You have come to the right place though. Many caring people who will help and support you.
Take care
Janine
Hi Helen
Welcome to the forum.
You will get some good help and support here.
Karen
It is not easy to find happiness in ourselves, and it is not possible to find it elsewhere.
Welcome aboard Helen!! Looking forward to getting to know you better :D
Muddled Mind
12-04-05, 21:03
You have to look on the bright side, that being that you are seeking help. And remember we are here for you. So try to keep on the positive side. #And keep on going to work, that's really good for your confidence, it is more than some of us are capable of. But I understand, anxiety is very consuming. But we have to fight it. So good luck. xx
cheryl
Hi Helen
Welcome to the site and hope you get all the help you need here. You have asked for help and are getting it from other avenues and it will take time.
It is tiring fighting anxiety and can take it really out of you, but you sound to be still managing to push against it, hope this continues and i hope things start to improve for you.
Love Sal xx
Dont mess up the best things in your life, just because at present you are unsure who you are.
bluesparkle
13-04-05, 11:23
hello!
i just wanted to say i think you are doing great to be in full time work...
this feeling of wanting to cry i have never had before and im not a person to show my emotions but at the moment i just let it happen and as others have said its bettter than bottleing it up...i know its not as easy if you are at work...but the last few days all i seemed to have done is cry... but it does help as i find i can then get up and get on with a few things.
i know what you are saying about sounds etc sometimes when im bad i dont even like the noise of the washing machine!!!
really pleased you have some help i go to see an assesment counsellor tomorrow.
everyone here is reallt friendly and helpful and they will give you all the support they can
take care
rach
Hi Helen
How are things going for you.
Love Sal xx
Dont mess up the best things in your life, just because at present you are unsure who you are.
Hey all thanks for your words of kindness.
I am trying to stay positive and trying to keep myself distracted, unfortunately I am stuck in worry loops about the fact that they said I have obsessive thoughts. It's really upset me and I am so fearful that I may get OCD and it's on my mind all of the time, so much so that I cannot sleep at night!
I know this is unlikely but I need some encouragement that this really is not likely - my mind is just going on a fear trip and it is really hard to beleive that I am the one with the control.
I am so tired and spend my nights lying there trying to sleep while my mind does crazy things and I then get even more scared! I even went to the gym which was fab and chilled me out but I just couldn't get any sleep. Unfortunately I am hyper-aware of most things and they seem to be scaring me quite a lot. Is there a good affirmation or phrase that anyone has used to help to get out of the initial stages of acute anxiety as I am doing my head in with this excessive thinking and analysis of everything!
Hope you are all well! Helen x:)
hi Helen,
You seem to be doing all the right things so I'm sure that you will soon start to feel better. Make sure that you go to bed in a pleasant way. This may sound silly but if you take a good book and a nice drink to bed, it can often help you get to sleep..
Sarah :D
Hi Helen,
I think many of us can relate to your experiences, and am glad that you are still hanging in there work-wise and going to the gym.
Anything to divert your mind will be good, and another idea is to join us in the chat room http://www.nomorepanic.co.uk/lounge/chat/chat.html - it is usually busy from 8.30 or 9 - there is a mix of general banter and chat and anxiety related talk.
Take Care,
Ray
Don't wait around for other people to be happy for you. Any happiness you get you've got to make yourself.--Alice Walker
Hi Helen
I have been there and thought about something so much that i was sure it would turn into ocd and plague me for ever more. But it was anxiety that got a bit too much to handle, but better days wil come hun and you know that and you are trying really hard to keep a hold of it all.
You are doing well, so remind yourself of that.
Love Sal xx
Dont mess up the best things in your life, just because at present you are unsure who you are.
OOOhhhh I seemed to have started thinking about my hands getting dirty like when u put your hands on escalators etc! They are tingly too and my body just seems to be homing in on them. Am so scared that I am going to end up with some sort of hygene disorder and then have to wash all day! Ohhhh why do I have to get so hung up on things, ever since the docs said I had obsessive thoughts I seem to have been so concerned about everything I think about and do!
Please tell me other people have felt like this and got out of it - I am trying so much to stay in control but I am getting all scared as I am thinking about every action before I do it! Its so complicated, my thoughts are not automatic and I am questioning everything.
I upped my dose of Citalopram to 30mg from 20 so hopefully that will help me to chill out a bit! My appetite has gone completely and I really wanna eat but it really isn't appealling!
Please give me some support as I am so scared of ending up with compulsions!
Hxxxxx
Hi Helen
Can understand how you feel but try not to worry about it. Easy to say I know. For affirmations have all in the Fun/Toptips section. They is a topic called Affirmations and am sure that something will be in there to help. they are all great. Try reading a good book before you go to bed or watching a nice film. Distraction is the only method that helps really and trying to shut your mind off. I know we all can relate to excessive thinking and analysing everything and it drives you nuts. Try some essential oils burning in your roomat nite lavender is nice and rose. Also try some complimentary theraphies like reflexology or reiki. These are nice and relaxing as well as help the condition even accupunture.
Anyway take care
Janine
Hi Helen
How are you feeling? Hope things are going okay.
Love Sal xx
Dont mess up the best things in your life, just because at present you are unsure who you are.
nomorepanic
16-04-05, 16:40
Hi Helen
Welcome aboard the forum. When I was at my worst with panic I used to get a bit of OCD as well. I think it is cos we transfer our thoughts to other things and then things end up as rituals and obsessions.
I hope you get all the support you need on here and there is always someone to answer your questsions.
Have you got any good relaxation CD's to listen to?
Nicola
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