Pregnancy Panic

[Jo~Jo]

Hello everyone,


My husband and I want to start a family but I have developed a phobia about becoming pregnant.


I'm not overly anxious about the birth, morning sickness, getting fat or being a mum. I am panicking about panicking - which I know is hard for people to understand if they have never experienced a panic attack, but I thought the members on here would probably understand.


On my 'strong' days I tell myself to just get on with it because I know I would make a good mum. But most of the time just the thought of being pregnant turns my stomach. When I panic I feel a desperate need to escape from the situation and would do anything to feel better - but I would be 'trapped'. I don't trust myself not to do something extreme like have an abortion, even though this is not what I want.


Has anybody else felt like this? I am in such a dilemma.


Thank you, Jo

[yorkylover]

Hi Jo I can understand how you are feeling,but you sound like you would be a great mum.I cant give you much advise as I have never been pregnant,but what I can advise is speak to your gp.I have let panic and anxiety take over my life for many years and this has also got in the way of me having a family,as well as hormonal problems.I wish I had got help along time ago as Im 41 and my biological clock is more or less going!!!!!:weep: :weep:

I hope someone can offer some helpfull support here who has been through the same as you.:bighug1:

[charmain24]

hi jo jo. well im a voice with experience i already had one son but didnt suffer with anxiety or panic back then but i was desperate for another child as i didnt want my eldest to be a lonely child. i was scared of the thought of being trapped i hated the idea of something growing inside me as lovely as another baby was it felt like having cancer to me if that makes any sense i thought i would have been on a death sentence. i now have another child he is 5 months old now and jo jo its not as bad as u think its gonna be. dont let panic get in the way of starting a family cos as u get older u will wish u got the help. im 24 and have 2 children now and so very grateful that i found the strength to carry on with my pregnancy as i dont agree with abortions. and id do it again. the results is amazing and its all worth it. ive suffered with anxiety panic and depression for 5 years now. hope this helps xxx

[PUGLETMUM]

:) hi jo jo, yes i agree with charmain. i have let anxiety stop me from having another child nad i now deeply regret it:weep: i am now prob too old and we cannot afford to do it anyway now, and besides things move on and it feels too hard to go back. i have no friends, no job, very few family and any support we did have is now getting old and wants to have a life of their own - which is totally understandable. i wish i had realised that i could have coped, but i couldnt beleive thati would ever get better - and now i have to live with it. you will get better from your anxiety, because you can always come on nmp and KNOW you are not alone - that knowledge itself has helped soooo many ppl get their lives back:hugs: so i would say if you have a good situation and you and your husband are okay then i would not put it off - anxiety cannot kill you no matter how bad it gets - and you may find you have zero anxiety through your preganancy like i did exactly because youu are pregnant. btw yes when contemplating pregnancy i do feel worried about being 'invaded' and not being able to get away from it - but it can feel a bit like that for EVERYONE - a few ppl i know didnt like being pregnant but they prob didnt really worry about that. whereas im the sort of person where feeling anything negative makes me feel bad - but you dont need to feel bad - there is no right or wrong way to feel when you are pregnant - it is a unique experience to you! tc emma

[breeze25]

Hi,

Agree with others in not letting anxiety get in the way.

Luckily for me I fell pregnant by accident, I freaked right out to me I panicked lots and like you it wasn't about the birth or anything most people could relate to, but the being pregnant, I hated the thought that I would have this baby inside me and wouldn't be able to escape it. I felt like an alien was growing inside me, and I freaked out for a little bit, but everything was fine, I found that having a baby inside made me think of something else something more positive and slowly I can round and actually enjoyed many aspects of it. Never once did I even freak out about the birth. Went on to have a wonderful son.

Thinking about it I migt not have wanted to get pregnant if I had thought about it, but for me it was the best thing i ever did, and now several years down the road I have 2 fantastic kids and wouldn't change a thing. xx

[Janieb]

I can kind of relate to how you are feeling, I have had one child and developed my Health Anx as a result of PND following the birth, but that was due to me not really the doctors so don't let that put u off.

I am terrified of having another child, however some days it's good and some days I think man I can't go through this again and worry about a million and one things because my first pregnancy was not really easy but then again it wasn't really hard. I do miss my bump, never having to pull in your tummy, eating what you like cause who gives toss, I miss feeling my baby moving inside my tummy at 6am in the morning and just some of the feelings associated with pregnancy. I am actually getting a bit broody again!!

We were going to start trying for no 2 in Dec I have put it off till next year July due to work commitments but it's oh so worth it. The end result is amazing beyond your belief one thing I would mention is be upfront with the medical staff about any panic attacks or anx you have they will help!

maybe just not think about it and see how it goes.

Best of luck
Jane

[ladygrom]

hi i totaly agree dnt let anxiety put you off i suffer health anxiety have dn for few years now and ive gon on to having 2 lovely kids .i was absolutely fine threw pregnancy and birth also had alot of help and understanding by the medical staff and was well looked after and im sure you wud b 2 tc xxx

[samc100]

Hi Jo-Jo

I am pregnant with my 2nd child.

Even if you don't suffer with anxiety pregnancy can be pretty worrying especially in the early stages. Dr's and midwives can help with this. Many maternity hospitals do have 'anxiety clinics' for mums to be who need the support e.g. councelling or ( and I love this idea...) aromatherapy massages/reflexlogy etc... And they monitor you closely. So you will have support.

You take one day at a time with pregnancy so try not to let the fear stop you. Motherhood is a wonderful rollercoaster and I adore my little boy so much it still amazes me how much I could love him.

[lilly-lou]

Hi Jo,
I managed to have 2 high risk pregnancies while suffering from agoraphobia, I wasn't bothered about being pregnant but about all the appointments I knew I had to attend as I'm frightened about having a panic attack and passing out in front of people. I had a very good consultant who knew about all my problems and gave the first appointment at the morning clinic. Try not to let your fear stop you from having children, try and find a sympathetic g.p. to talk things through with I'm sure with the right support you will manage a pregnancy.
good luck
:hugs:

[Jo~Jo]

Thank you to everyone for your kind replies. I am feeling more optimistic now, just hope it lasts!

Will keep you posted.

Thank you again. :flowers: