What have I done?

[gers]

Hi

This might sound very silly, but here goes.

Has anybody ever made arrangements for a night out, even help by giving suggestions as to where we could go, what time, how we get home etc etc, and then once your on your own again, think Oh S**t ! I cant go, why on earth did I get involved in this.
I have not been out for years with friends, partly because I dont actually have any where I live now. I have been out with my boyfriend once in 18months, and I dont drink now either.
Now im in a new job and our care house is about to open in less than 2 weeks, we all thought it would be nice as a new team to go out for a meal and drinks. The age is mixed so there would be somebody there my age, I dont have to drink I dont suppose, but I really feel awkward and like I dont fit in, or I wont fit in, and I look for reasons not to go now.
Deep down I really want to do this, I tried to text and explain im a bit nervous to one of my colleagues, but she kind of dismissed it and I dont think she really believes me as I was a bundle of laughs when we had our team meeting.
How can I be so upbeat one minute then when something nice comes up like a night out, I get the fear of death into me, even though some of the planning was my doing. Bizzarre!!
So has anybody any suggestions how I get myself out there. My boyfriend wants me to go, and has tried the "il drag you there if I have to" routine, but has since realised the more he pushes the mroe I wont go. Any ideas would be welcome PLEASE.

Fiona.

[Jaco45er]

Hiya Fiona

My mates joke and call me "Mr no show" on account of how many times I say I will be there and never turn up.

Not so much now, but I used to think I would have high anxiety when in the pub etc and would have to leave.

That said, everytime I just said "oh what the hell, I am going" I always had a good time.

So just say what the hell :)

Good Luck

Jaco

P.S. that name, gers, not what I think it is, is it? ;)

[marie1974]

hiya i have been there before and wished id kept my mouth shut hehe but i would say you are worrying to much wot people think of you and you should just be yourself totally and go for it and i bet you have a great time. sometimes when u sit thinking to much u can talk your self out of things and im sure all yr colleagues think u are lovely and its just how u feel in yourself so u should go and enjoy yourself hugs xxx

[pooh]

Hi gers, all of your behaviour to this point clearly indicateds that YOU WANT TO GO!!!! talking about it having a laugh helping to organise, the only perceived hitch is a WHAT IF. Im not dismissing your anx but you want to go so bite the bullet, go and keep busy laughing and chatting and you wont have time to have anything other than a great time.

Get your glad rags on and get out there and i look forward to you reporting back to tell us all what a great time you had.

Lynne x

[marie1974]

great post poo:yesyes: :hugs: xxx

[gers]

Hey,

Yes Donna, I do wish id kept my mouth shut, and Yes Pooh, I do want to go. Im going to try really hard, if I do go, il probably be on the phone all night texting my boyfriend for re assurance and things like that. Even when im out at the shops I phone or text several times to report on how im doing or what ive bought. When really I should keep this for when I get home and tell him all about it then. Im a total daftie.
It is a lot of "What If's", but I do that with everything just about in life. I think if I can manage to do this, it would help boost my confidence no end, and il be so pleased with myself. Ive tried giving myself a boot up the jacksie but I nearly broke my leg trying to get my foot round there. lol
Thanks for your replies, all the help I can get is appreciated.

Fiona. x