Emetophobia and children

[missyb525]

I have suffered from Emetophobia for most of my life and although it's not as bad as some peoples, at certain times it can get pretty bad. I'm not too bad at eating out but always check sell by dates and could quite happily lock myself away if a sickness bug is going around.

I really never thought I would ever be able to have children because of the likelihood of morning sickness but 2 years ago I had my daughter and I then went on to have my son 8 months ago. Thankfully I never suffered from morning sickness so feel I was very lucky.

The problem I am now having is that I can kind of cope with being sick myself(I cope better than I used to) but am having a real problem coping with my children when they are sick. When they are babies and bring up a bit of milk I can cope fine, but when they have a bug and are sick I could quite happily just up and leave as I really cannot cope. I find myself constantly watching any change in their behaviour just incase they are getting ill, and then spend the next couple of days worrying as I have convinced myself they are going to be ill but most times this never happens. I drive my husband up the wall because I get so wound up by this and just go on and on about how they could be ill. My little girl is starting to pick up on my reactions when I think they may be sick and is now also panicking if she coughs or gets hiccups incase she is sick.

I feel so terrible because the last thing I want to do is pass this horrid phobia onto my children and it just hurts so much that I can't get over this phobia to help them when they are really scared and need me.

I am currently waiting to start CBT for this but I have gone from feeling positive that it is going to work, to now feeling really negative as I really can't see myself ever getting over this.

I had hoped that by having children and having to look after them when they were ill I would learn to control this phobia but it hasn't.

Sorry to go on so much about this but was just hoping that someone may be able to reassure me I can get to a point where I will be able to cope with my children when they are poorly.

Thanks :)

[nic77]

i have been the same for years and i have children i had cbt and i found it to be very helpful and i am coping better then i used to good luck and stay postive

[pinkchic]

I know im very late with this post but I only just discovered this site. I dont fear being sick myself, well any more, as I realised its not as bad as the anticipation!! but the thought of having children is terrifying.

It really worries me, as they grow up they WILL get sick and I WILL have to deal with that. I worry that I'll be a terrible mother because I jsut wont be able to cope. I feel like I wont be able to take them on holiday due to potential travel sickness. Its just such a horrible feeling and although im only 21 this seriously affects me! I just dont know what I would do if I couldnt cope!!

Your so brave, im sure its a matter of having to cope. But it scares me silly!!

[littlegem4lifex]

I feel exactly the same. I'm worried about having kids because if they were ill i could not look after them i'd just run away an lock myself in a room. i want children in the future but at the moment i don't think i could cope. i barely cope with being ill myself cus i shake an start crying.

[orangeblossom]

Hi missy,

I think it is understandable that you feel this way - it actually makes sense. You have worked incredibly hard to get to the point where you have two small children and have been able to deal with the bit of milk they sometimes bring up, but it now sounds as if you are over-sensitised to them being ill. It is impossible to control - we all know and understand that - but because you are around them all the time, and because it is random, it could happen any time and you are in hypervigilant mode. It sounds exhausting.

I am an emetaphobe and I get exhausted just thinking about myself being ill so you having to deal with it around your children too sounds like an emetaphobes worst nightmare!

Don't be disheartened about the CBT - it is really great that you are going for it in the first place, and it really WILL help you to deal with your children and your phobia.

Stay positive and we are all here for you.

Best,
Orange. xx