Yesterday was such a good day but today!!!!

[jellybean43]

Hi
Well after my worries earlier in the week about night sweats and gums bleeding(thankfully not happened since---maybe cos the nights are cooler and i have got a softer brush for my teeth!!!!!) I had been feeling a bit better.
Yesterday I got the bus to see my son---granted not miles away(9 but takes half hour on bus) but it is a big achievement for me as i always make excuses not to do stuff and then we had a our lunch out and went to see the new house he is buying.
I felt on a high when i got home and hadnt given my anxiety a second thought.
Today however is a different story. I have had to stop in to catch up with jobs and stuff and sitting here at the computer i can feel my groin just twinging.
I then begin to poke/prod again and keep analysing whether the bump i can feel(as i said in previous posts OH seems to have similiar thing in groin and my GP said he couldnt feel anything when i got it checked in April!!!!!!) is just the same size etc.
I then make myself feel near to tears by prodding it and worrying again about lymphoma!!
Now, yesterday i had had a really good nights sleep the night before and felt great. Last night i didnt sleep aswell and lo and behold i have felt loads more anxious.
Can anyone else reassure me that they can feel bumps etc in groin and that poking it is causing it to hurt???
I feel today i have slipped back after a couple of good days.
On a more positive note i have rung the CBT and I am half way up the list and she says it should be 6 weeks maximum waiting time----roll on!!!!!
xxx

[milly jones]

hi j bean

yes if i poke my groin i can feel lots of bumps and it does hurt hun if i press too hard, or poke in certain bits

take care xxx

mill :)

[Worrier]

Gill,

I always feel so bad for you when I read your posts. So glad that you did have a good day which shows that it is possible and obviously it makes you happier.

You know that if you keep prodding and poking the area will be sore and it will get inflammed. I think you need to find something to distract you when you are feeling the urge to prod and poke. Make a pact with yourself and everytime you feel the need to do that, sit and write down your feelings instead. I think journalling would really help and then you could read it back later.

Please try and stop tormenting yourself with this (I know that is so much easier said than done, really I do), and think about how much happier you were the other day when you were busy thinking about other things.

There is light at the end of the tunnel, you just have to believe it and believe in yourself. I believe in you and know that you can get past this.

Keep in touch. Write soon.
Natalie