View Full Version : let down by sister
Sorry to rant again but I'm so hacked off. I have been feeling really down lately and my sis said that she would come to a ball play with me and the kids, I am all worked up like I get every time I go out, got myself ready and my boys and was looking forward to going as I only get out on the days my hubby not working as I'm not quite ready to go places like this by myself yet, she has just txt me to say she can't go now. I knew not to rely on her, she always lets you down but foolishly I did again, now I am so p***** off as I have a body full of adrenalin and horrid anxiety symptoms, all this has done is reminded me how alone I am in trying to deal with this illness.
All people do is let me down, I wish they wouldn't offer their support to take it away minutes before we meant to set off. This is one of the reasons I have shut myself off from the world, I am sick of being hurt, even my own family do it to me they are the worst, they seem to think it is there right to treat me bad and say hurtful things to me coz in their oppinion I am just a head case. I am never going to arrange another thing with her, some days I just don't know why I bother, the worst thing is my boys knew we were going and now I feel really bad that I can't go by myself with them, I am so usless and fed up.
lilly-lou
hi lilly poor u and i can understand your anger, i too have had loads of people let me down and i get no support from my family, they never listen or take an interest. i have learnt that i have to look after me cos no one else is going too. its such a shame your sister let you down especailly as u had worked yourself up to do this. mayb u should tell her wot u think and how angy u r because of it hun. i have 3 kids one being special needs and hubby works alot so its just me with them and its blimin hard work. i hope u r able to get some more help for u and like u i have sometimes shut myelf off from the world through being hurt and let down but i have to remond myself that not everyone is like that and i have to trust sometimes, im lucky i have a good hubby i hope u do too. hugs to u xx
hi donna,
It is so hard when so many people let you down to trust anybody anymore. My hubby is good but he works two jobs and is limited to how much he can support me and life can be hectic, I have 2 boys with special needs that can be hard work and 4 others to contend with so my needs always come last, I think this is why I am so angry today as nobody offers to come anywhere with me so when I get an offer like today I always accept it. I should learn the only person I can rely on is me
lilly-lou
hiya yes i agree with u and blimey 6 to deal with u must be super mum, cos i find 3 hard enough. i have given up on relying on people cos like u say we do get let down and i have got more strength in me now and i go it alone alot cos atleast i know where i stand. my hubby works alot too and it can make things hard so i understand u there too. my needs are always met last too and kids can be so demanding well mine can be hehe. find your strenght in u hun and set your self little goals to work towards u sound a very strong women and u must be to look after 2 special needs and 4 others so welldone u r a good mum xxxx
Thanks Donna, you always have good advice to give. I know I should really start to give myself more credit than I do but I find myself thinking about all the things that I can't achieve rather than the things I can, I guess my way of thinking isn't gonna change over night, I have thought like this for a long time so it will take a while for things to change
lilly-lou
yeah u r right lilly it will take a while but it sounds to me like u r doing a great job with your kids. i havent been able to do much since having my kids as i dont have family close by etc and now my youngest goes to school in spet i can finally start doing wot i want abit more. the time will come for you. i try and think postive now all the time as hard as it is cos i could be so much worse off. i still get days where i get angry upset etc but i manage to get over them and look ahead. you can pm me anytime shiv hugs xx
sorry i put shiv i replied to her b4 u and got a bit confused hehe dont take much these days
Thats ok Donna I'm very forgetful too. I am going to pick my to eldest girls up halfway from school and go to the ball play with them all, my eldest two are really good with the boys and help me if we go anywhere without their dad, I cant be bothered cooking so that will be a good incentive to get out and take the kids for tea. Thanks again Donna, I really haven't got anybody who understands how difficult the simplest of things can be to do.
Hugs
lilly-lou
aww sounds great lilly have fun at the ballplay and try to enjoy it cos they dont stay young for long. your girls sound great and a big help, let me know how u get on later and goodluck with it all. hugs xx
Will do Donna, and I know once I have achieved this I will feel better about my self I just wish that the feeling would last a little longer than it does, I'm so up and down at the moment.
lilly-lou
Hi lilly-lou
I've got a friend like that. She makes arrangements and then texts me two mins before with a ridiculous excuse. It's really annoying, but try not to take it personally. I used to get really angry, I still do sometimes, as I tidy up and everything and organise my day round her, then I get the text!! I've come to the conclusion that it's her who's gotthe problem and that she just isn't reliable. I too like to arrange things for when my hubby's at work as I only work part time and have alot of time on my own. When this person lets me down I could scream. What annoys me the most is that she is the one who makes the arrangements, I just fit in, even though I'm the one that works. She just swans around all day shopping and getting her hair done etc. Whenever I see her she constantly tells me how much she has to do and how her life is so hectic. God, I'm getting angry now just talking about it lol.
Hope you have a good time with your kids.
It is really anoying, especially when she lie about the reason for cancelling, you'd think that she wouldn't given the fact that I am her sister and will find out the truth in the end, she makes me feel so stupid. I did manage to take the kids after school to the ball play and we had tea there so at least I can end the day on a high, my eldest two girls are really good when we go out and they help me with the boys which lowers my anxiety, I was not going to let the day ruined by her being unreliable, I have done so much to support her in her life depsite the fact that I am struggling with my own but I get nothing back, its not that I expect it really but it would be nice not to be all one sided but you can bet that the next time she needs help I will be there for her because thats the sort of person I am, a bit of a mug who gets walked all over.
At least I am feeling chuffed with myself for not letting the kids down and we had a good time even though my son was moaning as he couldn't play because he has broke his leg, you just can't please everybody all of the time
lilly-lou
hiya thats great news glad u had a good time hun and u didnt let things ruin it for u all. hugs xxxx
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