Introducing myself

[Peter1988]

Hello, my name's Peter. Im not usually this blunt but I need all the help I can get really. My issue is that of my sexual orientation. Im gay and dealing with it amongst many other personal issues has made things very difficult for me. I've had consuelling, a still having it on occation and whilst I'd say Im more well of that most people its hard. I'd love to chat with people who can offer me advice. It will take a while for you to get to know me but I hope everything will turn out. There are times when Im happy but there are also times when Im low. Im taking fluoxetine. I general feelings are of cant being arsed. I feel like Im not strong enough to do the things that I want to do, like sorting out my back problems, losing weight, getting used to being gay and have it incorporated into my life. Ive come out to my family but apart from that no one else really. I feel riddiculously tired practically all the time, like my body just wants to collaspe until everything is better again, until the sun shines once more. Its only when my minds occupied that I dont notice it. There's so much to say and Ive already written a novel so I think the best way to have a Q & A with other ussers of this site are willing to help me. Yes, I'll stop now. Feel free to contact me at pr00018@surrey.ac.uk. Take care

[Cococj]

Hello Peter,

I'm also gay I'm a little older than you and came out at school many moons ago. It's not always as easy for some as for others and any anxiety you feel is only natural. Things right now might seem like they're all so big and bad but trust that questions about your sexuality are better expressed than kept inside.

Take each day as it comes, talk to the people here who will give you words of support and will undoubtedly make you less anxious. Don't let it beat you, everyone here knows what it can do to your body and how it can make you feel, no matter the cause.

Stay strong and if you have any questions about your sexuality or anything else feel free to message me.

Chris

[milly jones]

hi peter,

im milly and straight hun, but i can relate to the feelings of apathy and feeling low.

welcome to nmp, a community of non judgemental ppl who all have anx

milly xx

[Peter1988]

thanks chris and milly

[Peter1988]

just to add, I dont really think Im anxious. Like I said in my first post Im just 'dead' if you will. I mean I still get myself to do excercise, do physio, driving lessons (I just passed my theory test) and so on, but I just what to have a nice long happy holiday to regain the feeling that life isn't so bad and in fact quite enjoyable. Then maybe I can back refreshed a ready to kick problems to whence they came. But unfortunately reality makes that impossible. And whats worse is that Im dreamer.

[nomorepanic]

Hi and a warm :welcome: aboard.

Hope we can be of some help.

You will meet some wonderful, caring people and get loads of support and advice.

[marie1974]

hiya and welcome to nmp im sorry u feel so bad but coming out to family is a really brave thing for u to do so welldone. mayb your parents are good about it and support u hopefully, although i know parents can be a nightmare. you will meet lots of new friends here and get advice and support hugs hun xxxxxxx

[kellie]

Hiya Peter :welcome: to nmp its lovely to have you here :yesyes:
You will get lots of support/advice/reasurance and make some great friends along the way.
be sure to keep posting as it realy helps to talk about things and we will help you as much as we can.
hope to talk to you in chat sometime

take care :hugs: :hugs: :hugs:

kellie.xxxxxxxxx

[Peter1988]

Ahh, thanks everyone for all your support. Im not really the kind of person to be open but perhaps that's one of the reasons why Im struggling, pride is a big issue with me.

Im trying to think of a way to force myself to progress and move away from my tendency to be totally without motivation and energy. I was thinking, at the mo my situation is not that healthy (even though I eat plenty of fruit and veg, etc) and so perhaps I should just make myself do the things that will alleviate my bad situation. Such as exercise, physio, etc. Despite the fact forcing yourself to do things you dont really want to do is probably bad for you, it cant be worse that being in the rut Im in at the mo, right?

Also to note that I tend to have days when Im doing productive things and days when Im in a rut watching tv all day long. I love tv :)

[lilly-lou]

I think that when you are feeling down it is so easy to find yourself slipping into a routine of doing nothing and watching tv all day. Try and set yourself a roitine of things to do, as soon as I get out of bed I get dressed straight away because if I dont I will sit in my jimmy jams all day which only makes me feel worse. Try some exercise, even though you probably feel like you have no energy at the moment it will help you, maybe a short walk will help.
Do you know any other gay lads that can help you about your sexuality, it would be nice for you to talk to others who can relate to you in this way.

Take care

lilly-lou

[Peter1988]

I dont know any gay lads in person, there are some are I know a tiny bit off the internet but apart from that...I just came back from Queen Mother's Sport Centre in London, I was swimming for an hour. I also a walked for about 30min, but there is still an underlying feeling and want to be lazy. I always get dressed when I wake up, I dont really have PJs. I havent come out to the general public or any of my friends but I think I'll do that when I go back to uni. Really appreciate the advice, the more the merrier.

[sarah1981]

Hi Peter well done for coming out its not always an easy thing to do I know Ive been there myself I came out when I was 21 I'm now 26 now and because I'm shy and suffer with an anxiety disorder have found it difficult to get out and find new friends. best advice is to focus on one thing at a time and dont think of two many things all at once that will get you down. if u got anything to ask or just want a chat send me message.

[boomer]

hi peter
welcome to nmp be strong. Try to excercise, it will make you feel like you have more energy for the rest of the day. If your feel good, you give out a happy vibe and you will beable to cope with any other problems. If you need any help we are only a click away. ttfn

[Nibbles]

Hi Peter and :welcome:

You'll get loads of advice and support here while making new friends along the way.

Take care,

Mike :)

[Southern_Belle]

Hi Peter,

Welcome to the site. Many here will understand how you are feeling and you will get support.

Take care,

Laura

[weeble40]

welcome to NMP hope to see you around sometime

Emma xxx

[lorac]

Hi Peter

Welcome to the site I am sure you will make many new friends on here and get lots of good advise.

Carol

[Peter1988]

many thanks to all those who've posted :)

[Peter1988]

I was hoping to ask a question. It's a life question. Many people here say just be open to stuff. Share your feelings. Due to a personal experience which I dont think I'll go into I've been very distant from people, starting from a ripe age of 7/8yrs old. Sad I know. I was never really trusting and even now there is a part of me that says to be careful in trusting them. What I want to know is should just be open and not hide or omit who I am? But before you answer that you should know that all people who 'know' me see me as a quite, innocent, 'straight' (lol), boring if you will, person. Do you suggest I gradually show my true colours as not to shock those who think know me?

I mean dont get me wrong Ive never prentended to be someone Im not just resisted and hidden certain traits and wants. I am a quiet, reserved person, personality type councelloe I believe, but Im also playful and up for fun, which I doubt many people in my old school (none of which Ive contacted in the last year :( ) would have guessed of me.

Well I hope I didnt write too much and that you may be able to be so kind as to offer your assistance through the medium of lexis (words).

Also please tell me if this text should be in a different forum, thanks :)

[v3po]

Hi Peter, I'm gay also - my coming out period was very difficult (but not as bad as the period before!) anyway - I'm new to the board but from experience with other boards, I'd advise saving the really juicy bits to emails with someone you trust - either that or start slowly. I just think if you're in a bit of a fragil state you may not want to throw everything out there yet! Anyway, good luck and if you stick it out it gets WAY better! - david

[Peter1988]

thanks for the advice v3po, think you're right, but I have to start somewhere.

[milly jones]

well telling us here at nmp and opening up thus far is a step in the right direction surely, and we didnt bite, judge whatever.

i know we are not the real world but there are loads of ppl here who all have different backgrounds and who accept ppl whatever.

have u anyone special who u could test the water with first, small steps as in all of dealing with worries?

sorry im no expert on this, just trying to help hunny, tell me to butt out lol


millyxxx