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LisaD
27-04-05, 15:40
Hi everone,

Thought I would start posting here instead of continuing my Introduce Yourself thread.
I have been progressively feeling better and better the last 2 weeks. I think that the Celexa is finally kicking in and taking the edge off. Went on a snonwboarding trip with my boyfriend and friends and had an amazing times. On one of the evenings I realized that I hadn't been thinking about all the "stuff" that is usually whirling about in my brain, and almost cried with the relief of feeling normal. I was also feeling well enough that I decided I was ready to go back to my old job, and that it would be a really good thing for my recovery to give myself something else to think about.
So on Mon, went to talk to my old supervisor....and it turns out that he didn't get a big grant this year (I do research, so everything depends on the grants) and he can't afford to hire me back :( I was sooo dissapointed, I had been so happy and excited about this, and now I just don't know what to do. I feel like I need something to occupy my mind, and I am feeling better anxiety-wise, but not quite sure if I'm ready to face a new job, new people, new system...I just wanted to go back to the comfort of my old job with some great friends.
Now I'm struggling a bit with depression, anxiety about what to do next...and pressure. My friends mean well, but they took my willingness to go back to work as a sign that I'm "all better", and now they're trying to push me to get a new job. I know they mean well, but its really upsetting me because I'm starting to feel like an idiot for not being able to "get over it" right away. I think they are all confused because I have never had problems with anxiety before, and they think I should be back to the old Lisa by now.
I'm thinking about asking my supervisor if I can volunteer for a few weeks...gives me something to do, gets me around people, and maybe this will speed up my recovery....but then I'm also kinda embarassed. I know quite a few people there, and I don't want to have to tell them whats going on, but then I don't know what to say.
Sorry to ramble on, but I just had to get this off my chest. Do you guys think it would be a good idea to do the volunteering thing, or should I just push myself to get a job? How do you know you are ready?

Lisa

LisaS
27-04-05, 15:54
hi Lisa,
thanks for replying to my meds post.. seems we are both looking for the same answer.. when do we know!?! I was also feeling great, now after a few down days, finding it hard to know whats going on.. I did one day at work last week and felt well pleased with myself.. have now signed on to do 2 days a week from next week and ease in gently. I definately agree you should do something.. but whatever you feel comfortable with, even if its volunteering. I have found my down days coincide with days i'm not doing anything and sitting dwelling and feeling damn sorry for myself and why aren't i better yet.. the key really is to keep busy.. i wish i could give myself this advice! good for you for going snowboarding! wow! you should feel really really pleased with yourself for doing that..
keep in touch honey.. we will do it together! in true Lisa style!
write soon,
Other Lisa
xxx

seh1980
27-04-05, 15:56
hi Lisa,

It can hard to know sometimes how over the anxiety you are. I think it would be a good idea to volunteer for a while and if you feel good, then maybe try to find a new job. You don't want to push yourself too far at first because it could make you go back a few steps in the long-run..

Sarah :D

Meg
27-04-05, 16:04
Hi Lisa,

I think volunteering is a great compromise whilst you search for a new job, which may be now or in a few weeks, months time when you're feeling up to it again.

It'll also look good on your resume and good for references ..
You never know either money for research does come in from strangest of places too.

Will you be ok financially meanwhile ..?

Where in Canada are you and what research do you do ?


Meg
www.anxietymanagementltd.com

Watch your thoughts, they become your words...
Watch your words, they become your actions... Watch your actions, they become your habits... Watch your habits, they become your character... Watch your character, it becomes your destiny...

LisaD
27-04-05, 16:17
Thanks for your replys everyone, I think I will go ahead with it...it will be good for my recovery, even though I feel a little embarassed [V]

Meg, I'm in Vancouver, and my Master's thesis was on cancer research...basically I play with little tubes all day, which can be difficult when your hands are shaking from the anxiety (hence the anxiety about going back!)

Lisa, glad that we met up here...seems that we are going through very similar things, and at similar steps in our recovery. Good for you for signing up for more work, definitely keep in touch and let me know how it goes, and I'll do the same.

Lisa

LisaS
27-04-05, 16:26
Good idea to keep in touch Lisa.. I think we are at very similar stages! nice to know i'm not alone..
I am just going to walk into town now and get some fresh air as I haven't left the house all day!
by the way, I was in Vancouver for a month in '99. Stayed at Global Village backpackers on Granville then stayed with a friend on Broadway.. have very fond memories of cycling round Stanley Park.. what a beautiful place.. would love to morph myself there right now!
take care lisa and write soon,
Lisa
xxx

Meg
27-04-05, 16:34
So is that at either UBC or VGH ?

LisaD
27-04-05, 16:41
Meg,
Sounds like you know Van well! Its a little confusing, but my lab is at the the BC Cancer Research Center, which is blocks away from VGH, but my Master's studies is through UBC. So I attended classes at UBC, but did my research near VGH. What is your connection to Vancouver?

Lisa

Meg
27-04-05, 16:56
I know it well, I worked at VGH ICU for a couple of years as well as doing some stuff out of UBC.

I lived at 10th and Burrard and used to ski Grouse in the morning, sail out of Granville Island in the afternoon and hit the West End and Stanley Park skating or rowing at the club in the evenings.

Excellent years..




Meg
www.anxietymanagementltd.com

Watch your thoughts, they become your words...
Watch your words, they become your actions... Watch your actions, they become your habits... Watch your habits, they become your character... Watch your character, it becomes your destiny...

LisaD
28-04-05, 17:27
Yes, Vancouver is a beautiful place-especially now that its spring with the warmth and sunny days....I'm wishing I could enjoy it fully though.

So, there is something underlying my trepidation about going back to work-and I've been too embarassed to admit it to myself or anyone else.

For some reason, I have lost all confidence in my abilities as a scientist. This is what triggered the thesis hyper-anxiety state, and now has spread even to my ability to perform in the lab. I am terrified that I will get a new job and just screw everything up. This is why I wanted to go back to my old lab...something familiar to get my confidence back and prove to myself that I can do it. This fear is very irrational because I've been told numerous times that I was a great student (my old supervisor loves me!), but somehow I just can't believe it!

And now there is the issue about the anxiety. I have never experienced this before (just the usual nervousness about starting new things, but I wasn't even nervous when I started at the lab I did my Master's in). So now I am terrified that the anxiety is going to come back with a vengeance when I start, which will make me thing less clearly, which will cause me to mess things up, which will just reinforce my idea that I can't do it. Bah!

Any advice/suggestions? I'm sure that everyone has dealt with somthing similar (even non-anxiety sufferers) at some point in their lives, but I just can't seem to calm myself down about it.

Thanks for listening (or should I say reading LOL)

Lisa

seh1980
28-04-05, 17:59
Lisa,

It sounds like you will be doing what you love. Everyone is nervous when they're about to start a new job but the anticipatory anxiety is normally a lot worse than what you will actually experience when you get there..The fact that you are scared of getting something wrong probably means that you won't at the end of the day..

Sarah :D

sal
28-04-05, 23:41
Lisa

Just caught up on the post and well done you hun. Think you have made the best decision, a brave one but it will help you leaps and bounds and dont forget we are always here for you.

Love Sal xx


Dont mess up the best things in your life, just because at present you are unsure who you are.