any advice?

[chiko]

Hi

After having been anxious since I was about five years old, I am finding this site of great help to my illness. Just reading what other people go through makes me feel not so alone anymore.

My anxiety has been really bad recently, as my father is dying and he is taking his fear of death out on me by being really nasty to me. Sending me horrible text messages daily and letters. After I spoke to my father on the phone the other day, I experienced this involuntary twitch over the whole of my upper body, this went on for about 2 hours. Anyone else experienced this before? my doctor put me on beta-blockers but they don't really seem to make much difference. Do you need to have been taking them for a while for them to start having real effects?

I want to see my father before he goes into hospital for a big heart operation in a few weeks but he is makng me feel so ill. I'm not sure what to do?

Melissa :unsure:

[Zingara]

Hey Melissa,
Sorry to hear you're going through a hard time. It must be really really awful for you, going through this. Are you close to your father generally? Is this nastiness of his just recent? The involuntary twitch sounds like an anxiety response to all the stress and emotional strain you must be under.
As to visiting him, it's very difficult for anyone to advise you here... it must be very difficult, but if your father is dying then you will want to feel that you did all you could while he was still alive. When my grandmother died, my aunt was overwhelmed with distress and anger because they had had a difficult relationship, and never properly talked things through, and my aunt found it hard to cope with the fact that it was too late. Obviously everyone's situation is different, but I think it's important to do what you can to ensure that you have as few regrets as possible later on, and that your dad gets as much comfort as possible in what must be a very frightening time for him.
Are there other family members around who might be able to step in and mediate?
Thinking of you... let me know how you get on. xxx