Coming Off Medication

[Lisa-Angel]

I am having a problem with my Boyfriend. We have been together for two years and are on the veryge of maybe making a commitment together or at least deciding we will in the future. I have GAD and had a pretty low time of it about 6 months ago and the doc put me on Citalopram. It really helped me get my life back on track, I have started socialising and living my life to the full again. I don't feel anxious very often any more and if I do i can control it much better.

Problem is my bf doesn't seem to want to make a commitment until i am off the pills and sees that I can retain my normal managable life without them. I can understand his worries but shouldn't he commit to me in spite of my flaws? We can't all be perfect!

Can anyone tell me what their life has been like coming off medication to help control anxiety? Have you had time to learn how to live a normal life again and control your anxiety better?

Any views into your experiences would really be appreciated

Lisa

[Alisonj]

I guess my first view is that your boyfriend should never ever make a "demand" like that. If you need the medication, you need it. He cannot be the judge of how you feel inside and mentally or make an ultimatimum like that. If things are good and stable on the medication please do not go off them, what does your doctor think? What would happen if someday your anxiety got worse and you needed to go back on meds and possibly more? Does that mean your boyfriend would leave? He may not understand what is going on with you but he needs to support it fully. I mean fully, medication or not. I am not trying to sound harsh or mean but you need support and positive people in your life and this doesnt sound all that positive. Coming off medication can be easy for some people and a nightmare for others. Some things that can help is to ensure you are getting lots of exercise daily, a gerat diet high in fish oils and vitamin B and learn relaxtion and breathing techniques. But unless your doctor thinks you should go off your meds please dont!

[joyce1980]

OMG, this is what my husband made me do!!!!!!!!!

And it went badly, I am back on paroxetine but he thinks i will try to come off again

I just tried to talk to him about it and he wont as his mind is made up

If he can't support me and deal with what i have then thats his decision, i love him very much but i cant do much more for him about this

Its not fair to take my life away, I cannot cope without medication

[Captain America]

fortunately i was already married when my wife decided i needed to come off meds. i agreed with her though in that i was not myself...as she said, not the man she married.
coming off was tough, but i actually have less anxiety now than when i was on them. but i will say the mind chatter the first few days was constant...had to tell myself 60 times an hour to stop feeding my anxiety, as i'd go from one thought right to another. distraction was key during that time. when i started to google mrsa thinking i had it because i got a pimple, that was a real stretch! it got better every day until now where i can function for the most part as long as i do my daily journal and don't ignore it for too long.
bottom line though, don't come off meds for someone else. you have to do it for you. anxiety feeds off of lack of control over what we do, and is closely tied to our sense of self and self confidence.
besides, if he had high blood pressure, wouldn't he take meds for it if it helped him?

[Snowshadow]

I must say I agree with all the previous posts!!! Ultimately this is YOUR life and you need to do what is good for YOU!!! I married an abusive controlling man when I was 18.... HUGE mistake... I have since remarried and my hubby now is very understanding and supportive. Although he's gone through some anxiety himself. But any person in your life should at least support you, even if they can't truly understand!!!!!

[Lisa-Angel]

Thank you so much for all your replies. We have since had a heated discussion about my meds. I asked him if he would ask me to come off my meds if i had high blood pressure or a problem with my heart?? He said of course not. I think he has come around as he has told me to stay on the meds if it is what the doctor thinks is best, and to come off when he recommends i do so.

What people don't seem to realise it that anxiety is not just in our heads, like disturbing thoughts and ideas, and we don't imagine pain and a racing heart etc. They are real symptoms, and our medication gives us a chance to sort through our thoughts and learn to control our feelings, without the physical symptoms disrupting our lives quite so much.

We do so much more and have much more sociable lives with me on this medication, so why does he have a problem with it in the first place?

[Lisa-Angel]

Hey everyone, i just wanted to let you all know that i must have been wrong about him coming around. He asked for us to have a break last night, and knowing him as well as i do i know that its over. I had three massive panic attacks when he told me as it was a total shock, we havent been arguing or fighting and I at least have been happy. All he said was that he wasn't happy and that he does love me. It doesn't make sense??

[joyce1980]

Hey there lisa
I just caught up with your post, how are you now??
I'm sorry to hear about your boyfriend but at least you know where you stand.

Always do the right thing for you, your young so go enjoy your life