Aloe20something
28-07-08, 11:03
i wasnt sure which place to put this in, but anyway, last night my longterm bf and i were talking about how his parents avoid me, and i dont like it. and how it feels like he thinks its ok because he still talks to them, and then suddenly- whoosh- cant breathe, cant think, NOTHING feels real. NOTHING AT ALL. i hate the "nothing feels real" feeling. so i start crying, and go into a ball on the bed, covering my head like im in danger, and then i feel like i cant trust anyone or anything!!! not my boyfriend! not my therapist!! like it felt like all this time my boyfriend had been messing with me...why? because he doesnt know anyone else here maybe? i dont know. and like my therapist had been scheming against me with my psychiatrist or something, or something. i was really really freaking out. i have really really always had big issues with trust, but that seems a little much, dont you think? it eventually made me hyperventilate so much i threw up, and then i must have just cried myself to sleep, cause i just woke up, and im not really sure what happened.. Has anyone else had this kind of thing happen?