freaking out..fear of muscle wasting disease

[Captain America]

AAAARGH! I was doing so well all weekend too!

I have lost weight since being diagnosed with GAD. but today i noticed like hollowed out areas on the inside of my knees, wrists, and shins when i tighten my muscles around the area. I never noticed this before, and of course this plus all the muscle tension and twitching has me convinced i have ALS or something horrible! i see these areas and i see a skeleton....myself just wasting away.

has anyone lost weight and noticed any hollowing out areas? i'm 5'8" and 170 lbs down from like 195 about 8 months ago so not so thin i'd expect to see such things.

i'm trying to calm myself by telling myself i've been wrong about every other self diagnosis, but of course i can't shake the feeling that i'll be right one of these times.

aaaargh (again)! i have no coping skill for this!!!

[teabag]

Hey Captain America- have you any muscle weakness? can you still move ok? i think it sounds like you are checking yourself for imperfections which we all have. We health anxiety sufferers are prone to finding fault no matter what! If you are really concerned then get yourself down to the doctors for a quick check up. They are going to be the only people to reassure you. I really hope that you find some peace of mind soon. love, teabag! xx

[Captain America]

yeah i can move okay. i've had a lot of the muscle aches and stuff that seems like everyone has though. yes i'm sure i'm 'body scanning'. i have a dr appt for thursday night but that's soooo far away right now. i hate feeling like this!! like i want answers NOW and they never come, but an 'answer' would mean a terrible disease that i don't want either.

aaarrgh. again.

[valley]

Hi Captain America,

I too went through the same fear of ALS that you did. Mine started because of muscle twitching - I didnt realize at the time that it was a a common symptom of Anxiety. Once I noticed the muscle twitches I started thinking I had ALS, and was thinking about it so much I started to feel like I had muscle weakness, numbness, etc. I know now it was all just a result of the anxiety and thinking about it that made it seem worse.
If you recently lost weight, you may have lost some muscle too, which may very well explain the "hallowed" areas. I think its probably more likely that they may have always been there and you are noticing now b/c of the health anxiety. I did the same thing - searched and searched for muscle changes, signs of ALS etc.
Its good that you are getting checked by your doc, but it sounds like anxiety. Muscle twitching and tension are very common. Try a hot bath or massage - that may help reduce the tension and therefore the twitches as well.

[Captain America]

thanks for the reassurance. of course i KNOW this, but have been googling it all day anyway. hours of it. i'll probably do this until i get told it's okay, and then i'll move onto something else.

funny no other issues today. it's like i'm so consumed with this one, that the other stuff isn't bothering me. why can't i get consumed with something that isn't so...scary?

[precious78]

Yeah I know what you mean about eveything.

When I am focused on one thing the other thing I was bothered about goes away. That's why mine goes in cycles.

I know what you mean about the weight loss thing though. I have lost weight recently but not actually any lighter when I get on the scales which worries me I have a tumour growing somewhere. Like perhaps in my stomach as I have been getting indigestion.

I have no fat around my shoulders, knees or wrists now and it is freaking me out. Perhaps it isn't muscle youve lost but fat? I worried that I had lost muscle as well especially as I have been feeling so tired recently. I just don't know what to do cos my Dr just keeps saying anxiety every time I go.

[joyce1980]

This is so weird to read an makes me feel like i'm not alone.

I have gone through so many illnesess and this was one of them, your "checking" and you can't help it.

You mostly know that in the back of your head you don't have a muscle wasting problem...but somehow this time you might be right!!! God I know that feeling.

So against my husbands wishes I went back onto paroxetine....4 weeks later, what do you know...nothing!! it has stopped

I couldn't stop these thoughts myself and I lost a hell of a lot of weight, I used to weigh 53 kilos, i now weigh 45 !! i'm putting it back on now though and my husband and I are working through this crap.

If you have not tried medication, you may want to have a talk to your Dr andsee if something works for you, just to give you a break.

your Dr will help you on thursday.

here is my list of HA over the past 3 months:
Bowel cancer
stomach cancer
gall bladder problem
dimensia/memory loss, I'm 25 btw lol
numb skin which I though would spread!
muscle wasting
neuro disease
Nerve problems

Oh dear, my poor husband and mum had to go through this with me.

Good luck to you , you are not alone, these "symptoms" never seem to get worse just enough to make us worry

As always see your Dr for proper medical information

[precious78]

So true Joyce. I think that's the problem with me. I know deep down that nothing is wrong but this might be the time that I am right. I am only like this as I had gallstones before and no one diagnosed it whilst I was going back and forwards in real pain. So now I distrust them. Even though my GP is fab (I swapped after that incident) I still can't seem to get my head round it.

The tiredness and weakness is a real issue for me. I have never been real fit and energetic but this is different. It's exhaustion. I suppose my mind is making my body tired!

[joyce1980]

Just before my HA started I was walking up the stairs at work and I felt so tired and out of breath.

I now know it was anxiety but i understand why you feel this way since your other Dr missed the gall stones. try to remember that this is a very rare thing and always go to the Dr if you really don't feel well.

Good luck

[Captain America]

thanks for the support. funny, my doctor gave me an ultrasound last year that said i had a gallstone, and i almost had my gallbladder out. then while waiting for surgery, i had an attack of vertigo which made them postpone it. while waiting i asked for a follow up test to see if i could get a measurement on the stone to see if i qualified for dissolving it instead, and hey! no gallstone!

so i don't trust them either. my brain says if they can find something that doesn't exist, how easy would it be to miss something that does?

[AcroSplat]

Hi Captin America.

For the past 3 months i have also been fearing this ALS. It all started 3 Months ago as i begun twitching due to Anxiety from an Inner Ear Infection which only caused Dizzyness so i thought i had a Brain Tumor or MS.

The my arm started to feel weak, sort of heavy and weird, so i typed into google "Twitching and Weak Arm" and came up with this ALS ....which i never even heard of before......


I went to the dr and she said i had no clinical weakness at all and that the twitching was a result of Anxiety.

However stupid me couldnt let go of this ALS fear and went googling some more and i went down hill even more.

2 months ago, My sholder, upper arm and wrist started to ache, and my wrist and fingers started to feel stiff and weird. On top of that i was twitching all over but mostly in my left arm, which again scared me. Dr sent me off for an arm x ray and arm ultrasound. - They found nothing.

2 Weeks ago i was at my worst, convinced i had ALS ..... My arm felt so weak and sore that i had keep it at rest at all times. I couldn't even type with my left hand, as my fingers kept missing the keys.

I then went and saw a 4th Dr, who did an examination. He could find no clinical weakness at all, He said that by the time a person begins to Twitch with ALS, that there is ALWAYS evidence of clincial weakness that drs can pick up in an exam. He said i was suffering from Perceived Weakness.

He then told me top stop self diagnosing, and no more Googling, and start exercising my arm, as he could find nothing wrong with it.

So i went away feeling positive, but then within hours i talked myself into the idea that he was wrong and that i either had ALS or MS, becasue my arm and perceived weakness did not improve.

Anyway .... i went to this same Dr again on Tuesday. He did another examination and found no clincial weakness. He then went on to say that it was all psychomatic symptoms.

Anyways he was right. I woke up on Wens and felt so much better. Its been 2 days now and my arm no longer hurts, and this perceived weakness and stiffness has gone. Im still getting the odd twitch, but they are fading.

I still find it hard that anxiety can cause all this, but the past 3 months are living proof. Im also amazed that i was able to suffer from psychomatic symptoms just from worrying and learning about ALS. Its like my brain is smarter than me lol, and was able to fool me. :winks:

Good luck with the DR and let us know how it goes!

[Captain America]

thanks! 2 hours and counting....
next week it'll be my heart again i'm sure.
sigh

[precious78]

AcroSplat I have read your posts over the months and I am so gald that it is working out for you. Hoping you manage to keep on the right track! Just wanted to say that anyway. Best wishes.

[AcroSplat]

Thanks precious78 :)


Capitan America .... how did you get on ???

[yanksforever]

thanks! 2 hours and counting....
next week it'll be my heart again i'm sure.
sigh

LOL! I had to search and find this thread today cuz' I feel realllly tired today. It's not so much in my brain as it is in my body...anyway I had 11 hours of sleep, maybe 10 but maybe oversleeping caused it.

With HA, so far I have had (most of these were from intensive googling)

leukemia
brain tumor
ALS
heart defects and diseases
type II diabetes
liver cirrohsis
liver cancer
gall stones
renal failure
bowel cancer
colon cancer

Google is our enemy!!! a defff no no:lac:

[Captain America]

arcosplat? great name!

anyway my doctor felt my shins and said, 'you do not have muscle wasting disease. besides, if you did it would have shown in the blood work we just did'.

so now i'm dealing with reflux, chest tightness, and a fear of lung cancer brought on by symptoms of quitting smoking 10 days ago.

i do wonder if i'll ever just be able to exist again, without the worry. all it takes is one twinge in the chest or noticing a lump to set me off again.

[Captain America]

sorry...meant 'acro'....