not havin good day !!!!

[kairen]

Hi, i just needed to write this down then maybe i will feel better, i found this site purely by accident, i had been of meds and was doing fine, and the help i have recieved on this site has helped me no end, just knowing your not alone and peolpe undersrand and the advice i have read has been priceless, i know what to do to pullmyself around, when i feel a bit iffy, and i can stop panics now so in general i feel in control but every day i have to do that tell myself im fine ignore neg, thoughts etc, but today im just tired of trying and to be honest just want to sit and cry i have felt this coming on for a few days, its not panic or anxiety this time im just tired of trying all the time i just want to sit and cry my eyes out feel really flat, but im not going to, i just dont want to slip back down that road, even washing my hair has not worked this morning LONG STANDING JOKE, oh i dont know i think im just feeling sorry for myself today i cant even blame PMT anyway thanks this site and thanks for letting me get it all out xxx hope every one is having a good day xxxx

kairen x

[bethyboo]

hey there kairen, god i know exactly how u feel although im on meds at the mo and still get like it. Sometimes it feels worse to feel like this when im on meds becasue although i never actually ahve full blown panic attax or anxiety anymore, i still havew the same thoughts that im gna have one and they just dont happen but it is so drainig, the fighting this illness every single day of your life, somtimes i just wish i could wake up and be normal for a day and not over anaylize anythign and just get on with normnal crap instead of thinking if im gna be ok.I came off meds over a year ago and was fine, went back to work and then out the blue it happened again and i had to leave work and go back on meds. i just felt so let down by myself cos i coudlnt control it and drained because i knew it would be a good few months of medication and sorting myself out before i could be anywhere near normal again. But the truth is its just how we have to deal with it....day by day,, there are always good days and bad days and days , but we do get on with it and we do manage to cope, its jsut that like u said sometimes u just are so sick and tired of having to fight it day in and day out, im with u on this one and i know exactly how u feel. i spend most of my time just doing things that keep me occupies, going to the gym really really helps, just chilling out with freinds nattering about rubbish and readinf trashy books that put me in lala land, we all have our own ways of gettign trhough the days when things are bad but this site is a good start , like u said u can just spill it all out here and out is always better than in xx

beth xx

[seh1980]

hi Kairen,

Sorry to hear you're having a bad day hun - you know it's a really bad one when washing your hair doesn't work lol...I know what you mean about just feeling fed up with it all - have been there many times before myself. Just try to relax and take your mind off it, that's really all you can do. Hope you feel better soon!!

Sarah :D

[kirgray]

Hi Kairen, Im sorry your having a bad day hun, I can understand your feelings so much, I was the same last week, Ive been off work now for 5 weeks, I ended up leaving my job because I felt I just could not go back there, I now have a new job in a small really friendly hotel and even tho am crapping myself about starting there next week to be honest I need to get back to normality and challenge my brain with different thoughts...sorry rambled there a bit well anyway last thursday was awfull I felt so hopeless and like I could not see a way out of how im feeling and i started thinking am i losing the plot!. Kairen Id say dont hold anything back let it all out, a really good cry, share how your feeling with somebody- you really do feel like some of that horrible weight is lifted off your shoulders!. Try and watch a feel good film, mine is Bridget Jones Diary it brings a smile to my face everytime:D, anyway hun I hope your day gets better...take care X X X

[Meg]

Kairen,

What you're experiencing is completely normal.

To be thouroughly fed up of it all comes with the recovery - so have a self indulgant day, have a good howl and just do whatever you feel like.

It won't make you slip down that road at all, sometimes we just need to stand on a platform and get used to it before climbing up another notch..






Meg
www.anxietymanagementltd.com

Watch your thoughts, they become your words...
Watch your words, they become your actions... Watch your actions, they become your habits... Watch your habits, they become your character... Watch your character, it becomes your destiny...

[carlin]

Hi Kairen, sorry you are feeling bad today, everyone has 'off' days, don't put too much pressure on yourself, you will not go back to square one, take sometime for yourself (if that's possible) and don't feel guilty i've had many days when i have felt exactly the same, it seems like an uphill struggle, but it's worth it in the end, things will be easier, and do you know what? we are allowed to cry, feel miserable, shout scream etc... we re only human, but i think we put so much upon ourselves that when we don't fancy doing something that we feel we should be, it gets over exaggerated, the guilt sets in and we feel as if we are failing - we are not take care and keep in touch

[Karen]

Hi Kairen

Sorry you are having a bad day today. Remember the progress you have been making and you will continue to make.

We all have days when we feel like this and like it is too hard to keep going but you will get through it. Have a good cry if you need to as this will help release the tension.

Hope tomorrow is better for you.


Karen



It is not easy to find happiness in ourselves, and it is not possible to find it elsewhere.

[kairen]

Thank so much for the replies everyone, its been a really hard day, and i felt this rising for a few days, i used to work from home, have done for 8 years. but this year has been slow and i have only had 2 weeks work, which has been a good thing in a way because i hated the work (seamstress) and it was so mind numbing, no company all day, u never leave your work behind, its always there, and i worked long hours to work around my girls, so it has been a relief not doing it,

, but i think i have lost my sence of purpose, once i have taken the girls to school what do i do all day, so i think im finding that hard to, as i have to be busy all the time, i have been looking for a part time job, which i will think will do me the world of good,, see in theory i know what to do LOL but its putting it in practice, still feel really iffy, just hoping tmrw will be better, thanks again for the replies

kairen x

[seh1980]

Kairen - I'm sure tomorrow will be a better day hun. Hang in there!! :D

[alexis]

Hello my special friend, of course tomorrow(today) is going to be better, weve got msn sorted. still say it was you at fault with it lol, great to hear from you tonight, look forward to righting the world tomorrow. speak soon love me. xxx