View Full Version : A newbie.
Hi everyone,
My name is Richard, I am 29 years old. I had my first panic attack 3 months ago, after believing I had burst an artery in my neck and had only a few seconds to live, ok, I know that sounds daft now, but that's what started it all off.
That day, I had wave after wave of panic attacks, and was sure I was going to die. Thankfully my Stepmother knew what was going on and was able to reassure me somewhat through those stressful hours. I would never want to repeat that experience again.
It took me a few days to recover from that, but I got back into the swing of life rather quickly, unitl a month later when the panic attacks hit me again, out of the blue this time, and apparently for no reason.
Since then, for the past couple of months, I have been suffering panic attacks daily. The mornings are generally good, but feelings of dread come on in the afternoons and I begin a cycle of panic and nervousness until I finally fall asleep, which these days may not be until 4 or 5 am.
In just 2 months, I have gone from being a regular, outgoing person, to somebody who hides himself away yet is afraid to be alone, who dare not lock the front door at night in case I should get into medical difficulty and not be able to get help, who sleeps with the light/television/radio on and is constantly in fear of suffering some awful disease that will kill me outright or, worse still, leave me in a vegetablised state.
In the last two months I have been certain of having heart disease, an aortic aneurysm, a stroke, clot, parkinsons.... you name it - I only have to feel the slightest twinge somewhere and I am in a fully-fledged panic and sure of dropping off this mortal coil at any moment.
I tried to tell my doc of my concerns, but he was rubbish. Told me to get excercise and lose weight, pah. Ok that may be good advice but I need a response from the doctor which is a little more constructive - so I have signed on with another practice and should be seeing my new doctor next week sometime - hopefully he will be a little more understanding than the first.
Yesterday and today I have been feeling a curious, wooly-headed, dizzy sensation that has, at times, had me convinced I shall fall over, especially today whilst walking the dogs. I lost an uncle at the age of 38 - heart disease and problems like that run in the family - which only gives me food for thought and has me more scared. Part of me knows that what I am feeling is `just' panic, but another half of my brain keeps nagging me that what I have is something life-threatening, and I just can't , whatever I do, seem to shut it up!
Well, that's a little about me. I am glad I found this site - looks like you all give each other so much support and I hope that I can receive a bit of that at such times I need it, too. Whatever did we do in the not-so-distant past before the internet?
Take care everyone, and thanks for reading this.
Rich
hi dev,
welcome to the site, yes you will get loads of support on here and lots of practical advice, have you read the welcome page it full of good advice, your not alone in this as you will see everyone just wants to help,
take care
kairen x
hi Rich,
Welcome aboard!! :)
The way you are feeling is very common amongst anxiety sufferers. I think most of us have thought we are dying of some serious illness at some point - I know I have!!
It's a shame that your GP was so useless. That's the problem wit GPs - some are great and some are awful so it's just the luck of the draw. I hope it works out better with the new one. Let us know how you get on..
Sarah :D
Hi Rich ,
Welcome and yes we do support which includes encouraging you to self help as much as possible.
Take with you to the doctors a list of questions and topics to discuss so you don't come out having forgotten something vital.
Start here
First Steps : First Steps to overcoming Panic and Anxiety (http://www.nomorepanic.co.uk/showthread.php?t=942)
Health anxiety can be incredibly debilitating snd needs to be demolished illusion by illusion slowly and carefully.
HA: contiuously obsessed with dying (http://www.nomorepanic.co.uk/showthread.php?t=2691)
The woosiness is not likely to be cardiac but anxiety :
Spaced out : Spaciness (http://www.nomorepanic.co.uk/showthread.php?t=2696)
Dizzy : Light Headed (http://www.nomorepanic.co.uk/showthread.php?t=2951)
dizzyness (http://www.nomorepanic.co.uk/showthread.php?t=3062)
Light headed Light Headed (http://www.nomorepanic.co.uk/showthread.php?t=2951)
Keep in touch and let us know how you're doing
Meg
www.anxietymanagementltd.com
Watch your thoughts, they become your words...
Watch your words, they become your actions... Watch your actions, they become your habits... Watch your habits, they become your character... Watch your character, it becomes your destiny...
Hi Richard,
just a little note to let you know there are others who feel the same and that you are not alone. I went through a stage of having to sleep with the light on and i do usually tend to leave the radio on at night. The dizzy feeling you describe that leaves you feeling as if you are going to fall over has been happening to me too for some time now and i know how scary it is. It does make you think of all the nasty things that may be causing it. I never realised what a powerful thing the mind can be!!! I actually smiled when i read what you said about worrying about being left in a vegetabilised stated- not because its funny- but because i have worried about exactly the same thing!!! I dont know how to stop it happening completely but there is good advice on this site and now you can be sure you are not alone. Take care
Em x
Hi Rich,
Welcome to the site. I'm also 29 and only started getting PA symptoms recently.
Many people here will reassure you and give you support, and I'm sure if you look at many of the other posts you'll find a lot of comfort in them (worked wonders for me!)
Just to add my support, I can tell you that lots of people take health anxiety to the extreme; in my case a slight ache in my side is instantly a kidney transplant in the making etc... Also, like you digging up family history is a favourite of mine too...My mum had a stroke at 35 so this features highly.
Hope the new doc helps, but if you check out ok (which I'm sure you will) then you have to remember that chances of anything seriously medically wrong with hearts etc. at our age is very small.
Try to keep positive -- there's lots of help here
Craig
Hi Rich
Welcome to the forum. It's a shame your last doctor was not much help and this is unfortunately the case sometimes. Well done for taking the decision to register elsewhere and I hope your new doctor is able to offer more help and support.
You will also get some good help and support here.
Karen
It is not easy to find happiness in ourselves, and it is not possible to find it elsewhere.
Thanks everybody, what a welcome! I never expected to see one reply let alone 6!
And special thanks Meg for all those links, I have read them and now feel a lot better about what I am feeling, and definitely not so alone.
Thanks again all
Rich :)
Thats good Dev,
i have never looked back since finding this site, the help has been priceless, more help than i ever got from docs. people undersand what your going through here.
especially megs links so clealy written and straight to the point,
kairen x
Hi Richard
You are most definitely not alone, I only wish I had come to a site like this years ago, it is brilliant.
Take care
Delta
Welcome and I'm sure the site will be of enormous help, I've only known about it for a month and found it brilliant.
If you feel you'd like a good book on it, I know a lot of us have found the Claire Weekes book very good.
Good luck with your GP - mine's very kind and I think he'd like to be of more help but they work under such time constraints that lovely as he is it does feel rushed.
Love Piglet
Hello Richard,
Welcome to the site:D:D
take care
Maxine
pinkscrumpy
04-05-05, 18:46
Hi Richard
Welcome to the site. I'm also new and finding my way a round the site but it has been a godsend.
love
mandie
MANDIE XX
nomorepanic
05-05-05, 17:16
Hi Richard and welcome aboard the forum.
I am pleased the links Meg gave you helped. We keep a selection of previous posts that do reassure and help others so we may throw some more at you as well!
My doctor was useless too - told me to eat more brown bread. However, the diet and exercise thing is something to look into as it helped me enormously with my panic.
Good to have you on board.
Nicola
josiepickle
06-05-05, 12:17
Hi Richard
I am new to this site as well but I already feel that I have benefited from reading so much info and realising I am not the only one going through this awful stuff.
Like your Mum my stepfather had a stroke in his early 30's and I truly believe this has contributed to my belief that at any point something bad could happen to me or someone I love.
I hope your new GP is more understanding, I know I am very lucky that mine has been fantastic.
Good luck
Jo
Hi everyone,
Thanks again for your warm welcome and words of support - I had my meeting with the Nurse at the new doc's today and she was very nice; told me to lose weight ( I have lost 5 stone in the past year but am still very overweight so that wasn't anything I didn't know) and was also a bit concerned at my high BP and the family history of people dropping down dead all over the place! , but again I self-test at home with one of the wrist BP meters and it's never been that high, so I guess that was a bit of anxiety giving a false reading.
Anyhow, I told her about the panic attacks and rather than poo-poo the idea like the last lot she was very sympathetic and just for my peace of mind she is to do the whole gamut of blood tests - there's 40 all in all I think - and an ECG reading, but the blood tests have to be after a period of fasting so I shan't have them done for another 11 days (Tuesday 17th)
The only bummer was when I was about to leave and she said "keep taking your BP and if it gets very high come and see us at once" - I would have been happy if she'd not have said that coz now I am constantly checking my BP and am anxious that I might die between now and seeing her again - silly aint it - doesn't make sense but that's the way I am feeling with this blasted anxiety - constantly afraid of dying. [V]
I had to take the dogs out when I got in from the docs and I take them down into the fields which is ok but on the way back I have to climb a steep hill which always leaves my heart thudding and me thinking "keep going son - don't give up on me now!" lol it sounds funny but it's not at the time, as most of you I'm sure can appreciate. Anyhow, just 11 days and hopefully I'll get some atenolol or something for the BP which is my main concern at the minute. I do find myself wondering why on earth this should happen to me at the age of 30 but then I think to myself well there are always people worse off.
So anyway after I have seen the nurse I can then see the Doc and hopefully he might be able to prescribe something for the anxiety, too - I have a friend who takes Cipralex and it has really helped him...up until now I have actively resisted taking drugs of any form but just recently the constant panic and anxiety has become so bad that anything for a bit of relief just now would be most welcome.
Anyhow, that's me, sorry to ramble but this is a good outlet for me as I live in the middle of nowhere and family/friends don't want to be burdened with hearing about my problems all the time (and I don't blame them - until a few months ago I thought panic attacks were something that weak people had as an excuse to get out of doing stuff! ha! how wrong I was!)
Take care people
Rich [8D]
Rich,
A wrist BP monitor always gives different results from an arm cuff as its in a different place on the arm with different vessel pressures. How high was high ?
Well done on the weight loss so far- how much more to go ? Even if you end up on Atenolol or something when you've lost the excess weight it may all come back to normal anyway.
A period of fasting.. its usually 12 hours. What have you to do for the next 11 days to prepare ?
Meg
www.anxietymanagementltd.com
Watch your thoughts, they become your words...
Watch your words, they become your actions... Watch your actions, they become your habits... Watch your habits, they become your character... Watch your character, it becomes your destiny...
Hi Meg, To answer your questions...
You're right about the fasting it is 12 hours - I probably didn't explain myself very well in the last post; the only reason I have to wait for the next 11 days is that's the earliest they could fit me in for the next appointment; It's a very small rural practice and due to it's popularity it draws people in from a wide catchment - hence the wait - I count myself very lucky to have got in there actually because they are so full.
Anyhow my appointment is the first of the day so it just means not having any brekky that day - no hardship there.
Unfortunately I still have another 8 stone or so to lose - and I've found it very hard going to lose what I have done so far; I had tests for thyroid disorder done at the last clinic and they came back borderline so the doctor was hesitant to put me on synthroid or anything like that - but I do meet all the criteria for underactive thyroid (prone to put on weight and find it hard to shift/cold hands and feet/lethargy/dry skin and of course the anxiety and panic, etc etc) so this new lot are going to run those tests again and see if the result comes back differently.
And as for the BP monitor - I do rest my wrist at heart level to try and get an accurate result :- my resting BP at home ranges from 125/75- 160/95 depending on how stressed I am - yet in the docs it shot up to 187/117 so as you see the nurse's concern was justified.
Anyhow now I'm in the "safety" of my home it's dropped down to what is `normal' for me - but it still doesn't stop me from worrying meself sick! lol
Rich
How are you losing it ? Just get inpiration from as you lose it you're helping yourlself in so many ways . BP being one .
Ok hope blood tests are fine
Meg
www.anxietymanagementltd.com
Watch your thoughts, they become your words...
Watch your words, they become your actions... Watch your actions, they become your habits... Watch your habits, they become your character... Watch your character, it becomes your destiny...
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