Hey Everyone : )

[algrose]

Well I'm Akita. I needed to find a place where I could fit it... speak with others in similar situations. Well I've been "dianosed" with several things, but my main problem at the moment is my agoraphobia. I was diagnosed with it in Dec. 2003 but recently got a lot worse... I am pretty much completely housebound. The only place I feel safe and in control is here in my apartment, and I feel so alone in this. Im having such a hard time trying to find help for myself since I can barely get out the door. But right now, being around you all could help enough for the time being. :D

[seh1980]

hello Akita,

Welcome to the forum!! :)

I was agoraphobic for quite a while a while back. It takes a lot of effort but you will get over it. Everyone here supported me a lot and I'm sure they will do the same for you.

Sarah :D

[sal]

Hi Akita

Welcome to the site. You will get lots of valuable help on here.

Love Sal xx


Dont mess up the best things in your life, just because at present you are unsure who you are.

[nomorepanic]

Hi Akita

Welcome aboard!

It is hard when you are alone and stuck inside but in time you can get back out there. It is all done with baby steps and taking it slowly and building confidence along the way.

Have you any specific issues with leaving the apartment?

Nicola

[Karen]

Hi Akita

Welcome to the forum.

You'll get some good help and support here.


Karen



It is not easy to find happiness in ourselves, and it is not possible to find it elsewhere.

[algrose]

<b id="quote">quote:</b id="quote"><table border="0" id="quote"><tr id="quote"><td class="quote" id="quote">Hi Akita

Welcome aboard!

It is hard when you are alone and stuck inside but in time you can get back out there. It is all done with baby steps and taking it slowly and building confidence along the way.

Have you any specific issues with leaving the apartment?

Nicola

<div align="right">Originally posted by nomorepanic - 05 May 2005 : 11:04:25</div id="right">
</td id="quote"></tr id="quote"></table id="quote">

Thank you! And yes I suppose there are a few things. One of them is I moved back here after living in another city for 3 years , and so now im back in my hometown where I have a lot of bad memories. Theres been abuse, so in a way im terrified of running in certain people, or knowing theres many more out there who can/will harm me. I have social anxiety, so I guess that doesn't help either. My only transportation around here is walking and taking the bus. And I had a bad experience on a bus before too, so I find it extremely difficult to use them. ... Hmm, this is actually a complex question for me lol ... I do some odd things... like when I rarely do go out, i have to make sure theres a bathroom around, I have to go out at a certain time of the day.... I can't be in any small areas etc.

I don't have any friends... i haven't in a very long time... i had a bad experience a couple years back with a family i was very close with since i was a toddler.

I've had bad experiences with therapists/hospital staff

So really, I pretty much have a negative view on everything.... and so this agoraphobia i have isnt as simple as being afraid of "open spaces" theres a lot of aspects to it. As im sure its with others!

I have major depression/Eating disorder too, which I suppose is inherited ... My mother has suffered with it for years. I've gone through a lot with it including self harm/ suicde attempts... (but thankfully theres been no self harm for over a year now!)

So thats pretty much it... A bunch of things into one. I've been through so much , its hard trying to compact everything into a post ! (im horrible with writing lol!)


Thanks everyone for your comments, i really appreciate it, im pretty glad to be here

:D

[carlin]

Hi Akati,
welcome, first of all, well done for not self-harming for over a year, this is a very positive step in the right direction, the rest will come together slowly but surely, you will find lots of tips and advice here, maybe, you could be put in touch with a different therapist, i know you said you had a bad experience, but there are good ones out there. By the way i also can't travel by bus, i need to know there is a bathroom nearby and can't bear to be in small spaces, these are all awful symptoms of anxiety and agrophobia, and can be cured in time, take things slowly and keep in touch.

[seh1980]

hello Akita,

It's horrible that you have had so many bad experiences in the past. However, you do need to tell yourself that this things will not necessarily happen to you again. There are some very nice and understanding people out there who I'm sure would love to be your friends. We all need people who care about us. Are there any anxiety groups in your area that maybe you could join?

Sarah :D

[Meg]

Hi Akita ,

All of what you're recounting is totally normal for anxiety.. not nice or easy to get through but you can do it one step at a time.


**I pretty much have a negative view on everything** this is your key and one that you can do it alone or with professional support. It is manageable but harder alone but we're not going anywhere.

**And I had a bad experience on a bus before too, so I find it extremely difficult to use them. ** This does not mean you can't go on buses , it means the first few times will be tough. Whatvere happened before is unlikley to happen again.
As you already know, the panic does not come from the bus but from your thoughts about the previous situation

Thoughts : Lets try to keep our thoughts in perspective (http://www.nomorepanic.co.uk/showthread.php?t=283)
More thoughts : Mind Games (http://www.nomorepanic.co.uk/showthread.php?t=1789)
Thoughts: obsessive thoughts & anxiety (http://www.nomorepanic.co.uk/showthread.php?t=3096)

Creeping fears : Has anyone else felt this symptom? (http://www.nomorepanic.co.uk/showthread.php?t=3080)
Freedom from thoughts: Have you ever achieved freedom from your thoughts (http://www.nomorepanic.co.uk/showthread.php?t=3184)

First Steps : First Steps to overcoming Panic and Anxiety (http://www.nomorepanic.co.uk/showthread.php?t=942)





Meg
www.anxietymanagementltd.com

Watch your thoughts, they become your words...
Watch your words, they become your actions... Watch your actions, they become your habits... Watch your habits, they become your character... Watch your character, it becomes your destiny...

[algrose]

Thanks so much for those links! I will definitely look them up!


I feel at home here already :)



<b id="quote">quote:</b id="quote"><table border="0" id="quote"><tr id="quote"><td class="quote" id="quote"> Are there any anxiety groups in your area that maybe you could join?</td id="quote"></tr id="quote"></table id="quote">

I've been trying to find one actually! Its quite hard here, they dont seem to have much support groups .. BUT i still could be missing something ,so ill keep trying.... and another problem is that most of them would be in the hospital which is on the other side of town, meaning having to take the bus every week! Just the though of that almost makes me want to run to the toilet... sigh. But i hope that in time, i will be able to get one. It would probably be one of the best things for myself.


Thanks again everyone!

[Karen]

Hi Akita

Sorry to hear you've had some bad experiences in the past.

I too suffer from depression and social phobia. I also currently have an eating disorder.

Well done for managing not to self harm for a year. This is something that has been a big problem for me too but I'm now controlling it better.

Hope we can help you on your recovery.


Karen



It is not easy to find happiness in ourselves, and it is not possible to find it elsewhere.