Louise123
27-08-08, 09:16
Hello. I'm 28, and had pretty much convinced myself that the anxiety that i have been dealing with over the last year or so could be attributed to a million other things, but have now finally submitted to the fact that i DO have anxiety, i DO have pure O obsessive tendancies, and whilst reading through the various forum threads, can see my thought patterns and behaviours throughout.
I take antenlol for my anxiety, and am seeing a therapist once a week to work through my issues. I have also been a mental health support worker, and the line of work that i am in involves me supporting people on a one-to-one basis, and giving regular feedback, support etc. One of my main barriers in admitting that i was suffering, was that i have felt like i had in some way let down the people that i have supported / do support. But then, i had a bit of a revelation when i was designing an exercise for two members of staff, in order to get them to work more effectively together, and thought...."well if i'm asking for honesty, and genuinity...then i should practise what i preach"..and off i went to the GP's. Ive always had external support through supervision in some capacity, because of the nature of my work. This has always been a significant outlet for me, and i guess that is perhaps why i have managed the condition so well for so many years.
When i reflect, i can see that i have had a huge range of the anxiety related behaviours all the way through my life- from phobias, to fears, to panic, to ritualised behaviours....and now anxiety! I feel at a slight advantage in life because of the learning that i have done in psychology, counselling, supporting people etc, and i'm sure its no accident that i went into the line of work that i have done- in some way its so important for me to refocus the negativity and use it to really empathise with others.
I am also a married mum of one and that combined has been my biggest acheivement in life so far. I adore my 18 month old and whilst i have apologised to her many a time that she has been born to an over-sensitive and somewhat anxious mum, there is nothing that i won't try to learn about this so that i can explain it to her in whatever way that i can, so that she does not have to try and guess and worry about me.
I have had some recent panic attacks, and mostly ruminate about death/dying/upsetting people/not getting it right etc, and i struggle to recognise when i am happy, until after the event. I often have the sense that i am living my life on the outside, but inside i'm in conflict between what my thoughts are- the shame, guilt and embarrassment of them- and dealing with not acting on them- all of which i know is part of anxiety in general. I do feel so much more positive already however, having read through this website and hope that i can get involved in some discussions for support, and to offer it, too.
Well done to everybody who has joined, and blogs so openly- so brave- each and every one of you.
Best Wishes xxx
I take antenlol for my anxiety, and am seeing a therapist once a week to work through my issues. I have also been a mental health support worker, and the line of work that i am in involves me supporting people on a one-to-one basis, and giving regular feedback, support etc. One of my main barriers in admitting that i was suffering, was that i have felt like i had in some way let down the people that i have supported / do support. But then, i had a bit of a revelation when i was designing an exercise for two members of staff, in order to get them to work more effectively together, and thought...."well if i'm asking for honesty, and genuinity...then i should practise what i preach"..and off i went to the GP's. Ive always had external support through supervision in some capacity, because of the nature of my work. This has always been a significant outlet for me, and i guess that is perhaps why i have managed the condition so well for so many years.
When i reflect, i can see that i have had a huge range of the anxiety related behaviours all the way through my life- from phobias, to fears, to panic, to ritualised behaviours....and now anxiety! I feel at a slight advantage in life because of the learning that i have done in psychology, counselling, supporting people etc, and i'm sure its no accident that i went into the line of work that i have done- in some way its so important for me to refocus the negativity and use it to really empathise with others.
I am also a married mum of one and that combined has been my biggest acheivement in life so far. I adore my 18 month old and whilst i have apologised to her many a time that she has been born to an over-sensitive and somewhat anxious mum, there is nothing that i won't try to learn about this so that i can explain it to her in whatever way that i can, so that she does not have to try and guess and worry about me.
I have had some recent panic attacks, and mostly ruminate about death/dying/upsetting people/not getting it right etc, and i struggle to recognise when i am happy, until after the event. I often have the sense that i am living my life on the outside, but inside i'm in conflict between what my thoughts are- the shame, guilt and embarrassment of them- and dealing with not acting on them- all of which i know is part of anxiety in general. I do feel so much more positive already however, having read through this website and hope that i can get involved in some discussions for support, and to offer it, too.
Well done to everybody who has joined, and blogs so openly- so brave- each and every one of you.
Best Wishes xxx