andy_uk
28-08-08, 15:28
Hi everyone this is gonna be fairly long so you may wanna go get a cup of tea/coffee lol.
I have suffered with anxiety since i was 16 however it did "go away" for a long while it did come back though but it seems to have come back fiercer than it was before.
It started when i was washing pots one day and was staring out the window then i got this feeling that i couldn't breathe and had the most horrible panic attack ever and since that day the anxiety has been back.. Shortly after that happened i started worrying about my health a lot and my wifes grandad died around the same time so that kind of didn't help as then i started worrying about me dying too it makes me feel like i am such an idiot.
I have had so many lows over the years it has been unreal and have attempted suicide a few times also which is ironic for someone who is scared stupid of dying. Shortly after this panic attack i had and me starting to worry about my health i got a bad stomach in the sense of i could only eat chicken and potatoes or i was running to the loo as fast as my legs would carry me.
This went on for a long time but finally subsided and "went away" when i moved homes. Shortly after we moved homes i hit a major low point and felt like it wasn't worth it all which as you can see wasn't successfull or this would be on a haunting website or something never heard of a ghost with anxiety.
Since then i have had panic attacks where i shake, i feel like i can't breathe, my lips, tongue and fingers go numb my skin feels like it starts burning in the centre of my chest and then just radiates outwards. Then most recently the running to the loo after i eat has started again and i feel like i am shaking and my heart is gonna pound out my chest all the time this was braught on again when i went to my wifes birthday party had been drinking then my brother in law convinced me to go to town to a nightclub with them biiig mistake i have a major fear of big places where i don't know/trust people but the beer seemed to make me a little braver than normal and i went.
I got into the nightclub and stood at the edge of the dancefloor and could feel the beat of the music in my chest and that was that on comes the panic attack eyes started flying all over the place thinking someone was gonna hurt me my heart started pounding the shaking started and that was me running to the toilets and ill again.
The day after my wife says to me we need to talk and i knew right then it was something bad and said to her it's over aint it she says yeah i don't love you anymore and i want you to leave. I was gutted as anyone would be but called my dad and asked if i could stay there and was told no you can't and thanks for ruining my holiday before i got on the plane.
Since then i can't even eat everytime i do i run to the toilet i constantly feel like i'm just somewhere else or like i'm gonna fall down i'm shaking all the time too. I have been to the docs and she gave me some new tablets instead of the ones i was on took me to the chemist to get them and then took me home due to me feeling like i just wanna go to sleep and not wake up.
I just need to calm myself down and don't know how to i don't know if any of you will understand what i mean but if you have ever been in a situation where you are gonna be in a fight and you get that shaky feeling and your heart starts pounding i seem to be like it all the time. I just need some advice on how to calm down i have tried allsorts but just can't calm myself down i go to sleep feeling like it and within minutes of me waking up i'm like it again.
I have suffered with anxiety since i was 16 however it did "go away" for a long while it did come back though but it seems to have come back fiercer than it was before.
It started when i was washing pots one day and was staring out the window then i got this feeling that i couldn't breathe and had the most horrible panic attack ever and since that day the anxiety has been back.. Shortly after that happened i started worrying about my health a lot and my wifes grandad died around the same time so that kind of didn't help as then i started worrying about me dying too it makes me feel like i am such an idiot.
I have had so many lows over the years it has been unreal and have attempted suicide a few times also which is ironic for someone who is scared stupid of dying. Shortly after this panic attack i had and me starting to worry about my health i got a bad stomach in the sense of i could only eat chicken and potatoes or i was running to the loo as fast as my legs would carry me.
This went on for a long time but finally subsided and "went away" when i moved homes. Shortly after we moved homes i hit a major low point and felt like it wasn't worth it all which as you can see wasn't successfull or this would be on a haunting website or something never heard of a ghost with anxiety.
Since then i have had panic attacks where i shake, i feel like i can't breathe, my lips, tongue and fingers go numb my skin feels like it starts burning in the centre of my chest and then just radiates outwards. Then most recently the running to the loo after i eat has started again and i feel like i am shaking and my heart is gonna pound out my chest all the time this was braught on again when i went to my wifes birthday party had been drinking then my brother in law convinced me to go to town to a nightclub with them biiig mistake i have a major fear of big places where i don't know/trust people but the beer seemed to make me a little braver than normal and i went.
I got into the nightclub and stood at the edge of the dancefloor and could feel the beat of the music in my chest and that was that on comes the panic attack eyes started flying all over the place thinking someone was gonna hurt me my heart started pounding the shaking started and that was me running to the toilets and ill again.
The day after my wife says to me we need to talk and i knew right then it was something bad and said to her it's over aint it she says yeah i don't love you anymore and i want you to leave. I was gutted as anyone would be but called my dad and asked if i could stay there and was told no you can't and thanks for ruining my holiday before i got on the plane.
Since then i can't even eat everytime i do i run to the toilet i constantly feel like i'm just somewhere else or like i'm gonna fall down i'm shaking all the time too. I have been to the docs and she gave me some new tablets instead of the ones i was on took me to the chemist to get them and then took me home due to me feeling like i just wanna go to sleep and not wake up.
I just need to calm myself down and don't know how to i don't know if any of you will understand what i mean but if you have ever been in a situation where you are gonna be in a fight and you get that shaky feeling and your heart starts pounding i seem to be like it all the time. I just need some advice on how to calm down i have tried allsorts but just can't calm myself down i go to sleep feeling like it and within minutes of me waking up i'm like it again.