View Full Version : Self Harm
Hi, I'm new I joined because I self harm and I'm gettting really worried about it. At the moment my legs are covered in bruises and I have three scabs on my arm from saturday. My mum is a victim of domestic violence and im in my teens. Almost everyone in my house is depressed and I have no one to talk to. I tried telling my older sister I self harm- she took it that i wanted attention and that I was sick and weird! I can't get over my depression its so hard. Recently my mum ran out of the house leaving me with my dad. My dad ( who I hate) decided to leave me to- this is why I harmed on saturday. I was scared my mum would kill herself. Thank god she didnt! Help me please!:(:(
hello Nikki,
Welcome to the forum!! :)
It sounds like you are going through a tough time at home and if your parents are having problems, it is no wonder that you are suffering the consequences. Do you get any help for your depression?
Sarah :D
Hi Nikki
Welcome to the forum. You are having a really hard time at the moment and it seems noone in your family can see how hard you are struggling as they are too involved in their own problems.
It must be so hard seeing your mum suffer at the hands of you dad. I guess you self harming is a way to relieve the pressure you feel under, but that isnt fair on you. Is their anyone else in your family that you could talk to.
We will help you all we can. How old are you?
Love Sal xx
Dont mess up the best things in your life, just because at present you are unsure who you are.
hi Nikki,
sorry you are going through a rough time of it..
There is lots of help available to you on this site from people who are suffering just like you. you are not on your own.
Like Sarah said, what help are you getting? is your GP aware of this?
Lisa
xxx
Nikki,
As you might already have read, self harm is one way that people act out pain, physical pain is easier to deal with than emotional pain..
You do need to get some help for yourself soon and hopefully for your Mum too.
Your GP may be of some help to start with and there is specific help that you can access through school if you're still at one.
Meg
www.anxietymanagementltd.com
Watch your thoughts, they become your words...
Watch your words, they become your actions... Watch your actions, they become your habits... Watch your habits, they become your character... Watch your character, it becomes your destiny...
Hi Nikki,
My name is Lisa, I'm 26 years old, and I also grew up in an abusive home where everyone was so preoccupied with their problems to notice me. I fully understand how hard it is to watch your father treat your Mom so terribly, and all the emotions of concern fear etc that come along with it. I'm having problems writing this because I don't even know where to begin. I guess I'll just leave it as....I've been there hun, I've gotten through it to live a productive/happy life, and if you'd like to talk about this, please don't hesistate to PM me. I'd be glad to help. I know that the most important thing right now is for you to get some stuff off your chest...I'm here for you!
Lisa
Hi Nikki
Welcome to the forum. Sorry that things at home are so very difficult for you at the moment.
I too have had a problem with self harm and contrary to what your sister said, I know it is not an attempt to get attention. Self harm is a way of dealing with painful and overwhelming emotional feelings, as physical pain is easier to cope with.
Seeing your doctor could be the first step to getting some help with this. It is possible to stop self harming with the right help and support. Last summer I was self harming on a daily basis but now only do this occasionally when I get really emotionally overwhelmed.
We are here to offer what help and support we can.
Karen
It is not easy to find happiness in ourselves, and it is not possible to find it elsewhere.
Hi Nikki like Lisa, I know how you feel. I grew up in an alcoholic home, with an alcoholic father ( who has now been in recovery for 25 years ) and a brother ( who died 5 years ago. ) My brother and sisters are all alot older than me, and I grew up feeling like I didnt exist and people were to wrapped up in themselves. It has taken me this long, to start dealing with all that.
Keep talking to us Nikki, we are all here for each other. You do not deserve to harm yourself, you are worth more.
Feel free to PM me, if you want to talk.
Emma xx
Keep focused, keep positive.
nomorepanic
17-05-05, 21:18
Hi Nikki
Welcome aboard. Have you had chance to read the "Self Harm" page on the website atall?
Good to have you on board.
Nicola
Hi Nikki
How are things going for you hun. Would be great to hear more from you and to see how things are for you.
Love Sal xx
Dont mess up the best things in your life, just because at present you are unsure who you are.
Hey Nikki
I know how you feel, I too self harm and wish so much I could stop, but its so hard when depression has a hold of you. Everytime I self harm I always say "This will be my last time" but it never is.
Like you I have scars all over my arms and I'm very self aware of them, I'd love to be able to stop maybe one day we'll both find a way to stop.:(
Lis
xx
Hi thanks for all your help, yesterday i had a "breakdown" and my mum helped me and found out i self harm shes taking me to the doctor ;)
Glad you are going to be getting some help Nikki. Let us know how you get on at the doctor's.
Karen
It is not easy to find happiness in ourselves, and it is not possible to find it elsewhere.
Im glad that you mum now knows whats going on, this must be a huge weight off your shoulders.
I hope the doctors appointment goes well, let us know how things are.
Tatty B xx
I went to the doctors - what a waste of time! You would think that they had dealt with it before! But no they treated me like I was some little kid who's lolly had been stolen and I was upset. My mum got angry with them and they ended up saying that although it has brought me to the point of slef-harm I will have to wait a whole year to get couseling or any sort of treatment. I dont know what this is coming to but its getting worse! I have been bullied at school by a idiotic boy and know my elder sister is going to speak to him ( knowing the bully he'll start a fight!) I hope she doesn't get in trouble she has her exams to think of! [Sigh...]
Hi Nikki
Sorry you didn't get a very helpful response from your doctor. Has your doctor actually referred you to a counsellor? It unfortunately seems to be the case that there is often a long waiting list for these services.
Regarding the bullying, have you spoken to a teacher about this? You should not have to put up with this and it could be more helpful to speak to someone at school rather than your sister getting involved with the bully direct.
Karen
It is not easy to find happiness in ourselves, and it is not possible to find it elsewhere.
hi Nikki,
Sorry to hear about your trip to the GP. Some doctors really are useless. It's just the luck of the draw really. I think Karen's idea of talking to an authority like the headmaster or a teacher about the bully is a good one. Maybe you could give this a go?
Sarah :D
You have both said that maybe I should see someone in authority- I have and I get the same response as I did from the doctor- it will go away soon!- Is it me or because of my age I get ignored from socity, as a teenager or youth I have a label as some bad tearaway who's going to mug you, I havte that feeling that the little old lady on the road wished she could run because she's scared of ME!? Does life change when you get older ore does it get worse because YOU have to take responsibilty?
Don't welcome me abord I want a seat!
Nikki,
My daughter is 13 and has mental health problems and she also has to wait 12 months to see a psychiatrist.
She was also bullied, by a girl from school, who sent her threatening text messages amongst other things. I myself personally visited the school and spoke to the Head of House, but nothing got resolved. So, I phoned the headmaster, and within a day he arranged a meeting between my daughter and the bully and they managed to get to the bottom of it and sort it out.
Has your mom contacted the school about the bullying? In my experience, this is the only way to get things sorted out. The bullying will only add to your anxieties and it is the schools responsibility to deal with it.
Kate x
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