feel like im losing control

[kairen]

a family member has really upset me by telling me stuff that another one has said about me and my children, i cant say a thing back obviously as im not supposed to know, but i have got myself in aright state im just so upset woke up in a panick this morning have not done that in a year, feel like i have no control over this as i cant change what has been said, i dont know who to believe

i feel so stupid for getting so upset over this but its like the thoughts have taken over now and are spiralling rapidly, he says to ignore and not to believe it, but it has got to me, its the last straw in a hard week
i cant believe how stupid this sounds and how worked up about it i have got but im so hurt

sorry just had to write it down as i really dont know how to handle this situation as i hate any kind of bad feelings especially between family,
(his) it has just tipped me over the edge today
i cant believe how daft this sounds and the state i have got myself in over it



kairen x

[seh1980]

hello kairen,

It's horrible to find out that people have been saying things behind your back. It's no wonder that it has got to you. I guess all you can do is ignore it though and tell yourself that it's not true. We are all behind you!!

Sarah :D

[Emmie]

Hi Kairen,
I hate it when i find out things like that-its especially hurtful as it has come from a third party and not the person who said it so it's no surprise you are feeling upset. Try not to let it effect your progress- if the person couldnt say it to your face then it is not worth acknowledging. Take care, be happy and try to relax hun.

Love Em x

[Meg]

Hi Kairen,

**i cant say a thing back obviously as im not supposed to know**

Options are limited but you can take control back by telling squealer party that you're going to discuss it with orginal party anyway or you may be able to engineer the subject to come up and see what orginal party has to say to your face about it.

Maybe it is a misunderstanding of facts and circumstances.

Take care and you probably know in yourself which is more likely to be true..


Meg
www.anxietymanagementltd.com

Watch your thoughts, they become your words...
Watch your words, they become your actions... Watch your actions, they become your habits... Watch your habits, they become your character... Watch your character, it becomes your destiny...

[Sue K with 5]

It's really weird but I am having the same experience as you today, wll mine happened yesterday, my son is not currently living with me and has moved in with this women he knows, ( its a bit more complex than that but thats the bottom line)

I am currently in the process of seeking help and councelling to get him back home ( he left after an argument about his homework and following the rules)

This women took him to the dentist yesterday which I know might sound really childish, but its the fact that she is is undermining my authority and as she has no legal rights and she lied to the dentists about who she was I was mortified. I know at the moment I am the topic of the town, and the my feelings and my parental rights are being undermined and like you it feels like you are not in control. Well Sod them!!!! We are good parents and we are better than that.. Stand your ground to this person and inform them that should they wish to gossip about you, then you would appreciate being the first to know


Good luck in what you decide to do

scknight

[alexis]

Hi pal, take no notice as i said earlier,easier said than done I know but if they want to say things about young children like yours unable to defend themselves then they must be low life, and you know you are a nice person so they cannot say many nasty things about you, i also go with Meg.talk to the squelers and are they just out to upset you anyway. speak later, take care pal, love mexxxxxxx

[kairen]

Thanks for that i have calmed down loads now,
i think it got to me so because one of the comments was about my daughter who is struggling at school a bit she is only 7, but apparently it is my fault what they meant buy that i dont know, as they know nothing of my routine with her,
i think she was making more of it that it probably was but it still should not have been said,

anyway sorry to babble i know it must have sounded so trivial but i was so upset by it all

thanks again

kairen x