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Patrick S
08-09-08, 15:34
When I joined almost a month ago I had started experiencing panic attacks again after years of getting rid of them. It's taken me time, but I realise that my anxiety and panic attacks have always got a human trigger to them. Which might sound ridiculous. I'll explain.
I have been in a relationship for nearly seven years. A few months ago I became close with a female friend of our friendship group, and it culminated in me realising that I was head over heels smitten with her. On that day I had what I would classify a 9 on my personal panic scale at work. And since then I have felt nauseous ever since. I also gate waves of shaking, as well as dizzy spells and lack of connection with reality.

My girlfriend has suspected something, and God knows I don't want to hurt her, but everytime she questions me I start getting vertigo and a distinct need to lie down. Followed by nauseousness. I've spent nearly three weeks drinking and smoking marijuana (which I gave up years ago) trying to sort it out. This culminated in me waking up in a pool of my own vomit on my own last friday.

I am going to face my fears and tell this girl how much she means to me and how much I wish I could take her pain away from the amount of hurt and abuse she has recieved from her ex-boyfriend. I need to do this because keeping quiet has made me lose nearly six kilos in weight in three weeks. I've been shaking all day, with dizzy spells and hyperventilating in the toilet breathing through an envelope.

I'm so bored of being in a state of anxiety and the panic attacks are my enemy. Come hell or high water I will begin sorting things out tonight.

never2late
08-09-08, 15:54
I've spent nearly three weeks drinking and smoking marijuana (which I gave up years ago) trying to sort it out. This culminated in me waking up in a pool of my own vomit on my own last friday.

I am going to face my fears and tell this girl how much she means to me and how much I wish I could take her pain away from the amount of hurt and abuse she has recieved from her ex-boyfriend.

Re-read your first paragraph Patrick, and ask yourself if you will truly be taking her pain away from her -- or if your behaviour is only going to wind up giving her more pain in the future. It's an honest question, considering what you have written.

emma81
08-09-08, 21:07
I just wanted to say that as an ex-drinker and ex-marijuana smoker they both only trigger further anxiety even if you dont think so at the time. Having been tee-total and not smoked cannabis in the past 18 months i can honestly say that although i thought they relaxed and numbed me at the time they really didnt. Having bad panics and anxiety is bad enough without facing it with a blurred head and altered state of mind. A clear head is much better to try and deal with your problems with.

I wish you the best of luck in dealing with this,
Emma

Patrick S
08-09-08, 21:25
Re-read your first paragraph Patrick, and ask yourself if you will truly be taking her pain away from her -- or if your behaviour is only going to wind up giving her more pain in the future. It's an honest question, considering what you have written.

Never2late, thank you for a somewhat arrogant criticism, If I am self destructive when I am at my lowest and cause myself to look outwardly low, that doesn't mean that I transfer my anger and rage onto other people. Far from it actually. The fact is that my anxiety stems from being in a situation that I cannot control or figure a way out of. The girl I speak of that is been hurt, has been hurt from a guy that didn't care about her and made her feel no happiness. And I don't feel that telling someone, straight from the heart how much they mean to you is a behavior so bad. And if I don't get across what I mean in my heart, that is probabbly because I am dyslexic and typing takes me so long and never reads right.

But I should thank you, because instead of feeling anxiety about talking to her this evening, I'm just pisssed off that some total clown has decided to give me what they think is good advice. Which isn't. It's a forum, the nature of humanity can't be bottled into some 200 word paragraph?