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View Full Version : does anyone else feel like a ticking time bomb??



Neilr1978
08-09-08, 20:13
I know the thread title is a bit extreme but when i am going through a bad spell of ectopics im waiting for the nest one or feeling stressed that im getting them in the first place which your right brings more ectopics on,my family only have to look at me the wrong way and i get stroppy.Do many of you get like this when the dreaded ectopics comes calling?.With me its the waiting for the BIG ONE!! if you know what i mean i find it so draining and the fear i get from them makes me snap at the very people who help me the most:weep: :weep: :weep:

Mikke
09-09-08, 01:32
Happens to me too..
I even shave and dress properly for the day so that I don't look like a bum at the hospital (which I believe I will be in at in the end of the day :)

I know it's the sensation of having a sick heart that fuels the stress, and even more ectopics, but I can't help myself when I get scared.
I rest in bed doing cross word puzzles and waits for the big one...
That poor family of mine... but when I get so scared I think I go on another level, a survival - mode level or something... forget them for a day or too (not very heroic).. then I feel reliefed at still beeing alive.
Then a new ectopic or two kicks in a couple of weeks later, and it starts all over again...

Neilr1978
09-09-08, 19:37
Happens to me too..
I even shave and dress properly for the day so that I don't look like a bum at the hospital (which I believe I will be in at in the end of the day :)

I know it's the sensation of having a sick heart that fuels the stress, and even more ectopics, but I can't help myself when I get scared.
I rest in bed doing cross word puzzles and waits for the big one...
That poor family of mine... but when I get so scared I think I go on another level, a survival - mode level or something... forget them for a day or too (not very heroic).. then I feel reliefed at still beeing alive.
Then a new ectopic or two kicks in a couple of weeks later, and it starts all over again...

Ditto, when i have ectopics i dont dare pick up my young daughter incase i have a heart attack.My bedroom has to be spotless all the time for when the paramedics come in during the night which every night i am sure they will,or i walk up the stairs to bed very slowly to keep my heart rate low.I get my wife to check my lips all the time to make sure there not going blue like ppl who have had or having heart attacks do.check my pusle the list goes on.:weep: :weep: :weep: :weep: :weep:

cassi23
18-09-08, 15:08
I used to do all those things, not so bad now although if i am aware i have to keep checking the inside of my eyelids to see if they're pale or the right colour! haha, seriously though, i get aggitated when i get bad runs of them, my partner only has to mess me around a bit and i snap, cos im trying to deal with how s*** i feel and he makes me feel worse! hahaha, bless him the poor love, im surprised hes put up with me this long! lol

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

LeeBee
19-09-08, 12:22
Oh yes. Definitely. I go through phases of worrying about my heart, sometimes I don't think about it much (too busy worrying about something else :)), other times I get obsessive about it. I had a couple of little 'trills' today - a couple of little runs of v. rapid heartbeat while I was at work, for no apparent reason. I guess I had had a couple of stressful conversations. And very little food. Maybe it was something to with that.
A couple of months ago I had a triage nurse say to me "did you know that you have an irregular heartbeat?" while she was taking my pulse by hand. I just shook my head dumbly, I was terrified that I had meningitis at the time (I didn't :)) so was a bit preoccupied. I've thought about it LOADS since then though. Why did she mention it? I keep asking myself. I do get ectopics and palpitations regularly, usually once or twice a day (not often the rapid heartbeat like today though). And when she was taking my pulse I was really, really nervous, though trying to hide it, my blood must have been like 90% adrenaline. Tonight I was thinking it might be sinus arrythmia, but then she would know about that, wouldn't she? I've just been looking up sinus arrythmia on Google, and this has reminded me to NEVER GOOGLE symptoms because I've seen everything from "it's perfectly normal, stop worrying" to "you're a walking corpse". Well, pretty much, anyway. In conclusion - yes, I quite often feel like a ticking time bomb. Know how you feel :).

Dazza
19-09-08, 13:22
Hi,

Yes, - I've been living with the 'i'm a ticking time bomb for the past four months'. Totally know how you feel.... some days are better than others, but even when I'm feeling a bit less anxious it's still always there in the background....

I get really irrational thoughts about it... for example, one of my friends asked what is the time and in my head I heard and saw a doctor standing next to my dead body saying 'time of death...(with the time)'. Totally freaky. I also get the same if I see an ambulance driving past, hear a siren or see any medical or death related programmes on TV (I've had to stop watching CSI Miama, which used to be one of my favourite programmes!!).

I've had a bad time of it today... was convinced that I was going to have a heart attack and was in tears in the street (thankfully my friend was there).

I totally understand how you feel. At best it is really irritating and worrying, and at worst is is terrifying, draining and all consuming.

Cathy V
19-09-08, 13:43
Hi guys. Sorry you all feel so bad with this problem of ectopics. Im another sufferer but i have to be honest they dont bother me in the same way now. I finally started believing the docs, the cardiologists and the ppl who write all those books about anxiety symptoms. It might also have something to do with the fact that i was 22 when i first felt the missed, skipped, dropped beats and flutters, and im 55 now...so 33years waiting for my heart attack!

My kids have grown up with it and the rest of my family have seen the effects of the anxiety it caused. I planned my life around my wonky heartbeats. Like you i was so scared to move. Now i just get on with my life coz i do not intend to let another 30 years go by in the grip of this.

Weve had the tests, weve been told so many times by so many docs that there is nothing wrong. Ectopic heartbeats dont lead to heart attacks. They are benign. And if any of you are thinking about a condition called cardiac arrythmia thats not the same thing....and yes the docs know the difference.

I know how uncomfortable they are and that they bring on horrendous anx which makes your breathing difficult so its easy to think its connected, its not. We are anxious ppl and as such our bodies are constantly tense which means we always have extra supplies of adrenaline and these are classic symptoms...along with loads of others!

Dont let ectopics rule your life, you can run up the stairs or pick up your kids and go on with your life even when they are happening...you wont die, i promise you. They happen to everyone every day but most ppl dont feel them like we do. Ive got a blood pressure monitor and you can hear the missed beats on it sometimes too, you can also hear them when my partner does it but he cannot ever feel them...not fair is it? :D

Take care
Cathy xxx

Mikke
20-09-08, 04:03
Thank's for a really comforting post Cathy :)

kimmiepie
29-09-08, 05:35
Yes, often. :weep:

I was doing really well for a long while and then I became pregnant again. There have been some "issues" at home and I am feeling constantly stressed and depressed. Then add on to that the pregnancy, thyroid (hypo) problems, and the intense runs of PVC's (over 2,000 a day sometimes)...it feels like I just can't do it anymore. I'm waiting for that moment when my heart has had too much...being pregnant and stressed. I feel like the PVC's (even though I am told they are harmless) are a sign or disease or distress that my heart isn't working as well as it should, and the stress along with it will kill me. I've heard of women having heart attacks and strokes while pregnant and that thought has made me even more afraid.

I live with this fear, yet I don't have any support on the matter. Sometimes I feel like screaming because I"m trying so hard to ignore these terrible symptoms while dealing with so much at home right now. I think it would help if I had someone to talk to or comfort me...but right now I'm just really scared. Sometimes I'm scared I won't wake up. :weep:

Of course no one understands unless they have actually had such a scary problem themselves, just as no one understands being pregnant unless they've actually been. My kids deserve a better mom, and I'm so sad that I don't have it in me right now. Honestly, with the way I feel/act lately I sometimes feel like they'd be better off if I wasn't here...which fuels more worry about it actually coming true.

Living with intense fear and stress is the worst feeling in the world, especially when you're unable to get any support.

I'm sorry you're having a hard time lately as well. If it makes you feel any better, it sounds like you're better off than I am right now. At least your body doesn't have "extra" things to deal with. Hang in there. I know how you feel. :flowers:

TracyL
01-10-08, 04:07
Hi Guys

I totally know what you all mean and agree 100%. I have suffered these horrible things for the last 30 years with the constant worry that i'm a ticking time bomb. I'm finally coming to the conclusion that I'm wrong lol but still doesn't make the blasted things any easier to deal with.

At least we're not alone and we have to have belief in that we can't all be ticking time bombs and try not to let these things rule our lives.

Luv to everyone
Tracy

cornishdeb
01-10-08, 13:05
I know the thread title is a bit extreme but when i am going through a bad spell of ectopics im waiting for the nest one or feeling stressed that im getting them in the first place which your right brings more ectopics on,my family only have to look at me the wrong way and i get stroppy.Do many of you get like this when the dreaded ectopics comes calling?.With me its the waiting for the BIG ONE!! if you know what i mean i find it so draining and the fear i get from them makes me snap at the very people who help me the most:weep: :weep: :weep:
hi neil. i feel exactly the same as you and i am permanently waiting for the big one. i have had a bad spell of ectopics lately and iam fed up with taking myself to the drs for a ecg. everyday i think today is the day. on the days they dont happen i worry about them happening the next day and so it goes on. i wouldnt wish this on anybody but it is reassuring to speak to people like yourself and to know someone else understands what i am going through. this has been happening me for about 13 years and i am still here and the big one hasnt happened yet but i cannot think logically when i am having ectopics. thankyou for listening, debbie

Neilr1978
01-10-08, 14:17
I also find its very hard to be logical when the sheer terror kicks in.My g.p and councillor say think this think that or deep breathing,but when im already at the stage where i feel like ive got seconds before i collapse i cant think oh its anxiety the doctors have checked you etc.I think god im gonna die,i tell my wife get ready to do c.p.r to keep me going until the paramedics arrive,thats how real it is to me all of you.I have had some success with when i just start to feel like im going to panic i can talk myself back down,but even thats only 50/50 and when a ectopic comes out of nowhere like they mostly do for me its like flicking a switch to terror mode again.