nursey4
13-09-08, 18:47
This is a bit more of a rant than really a question but of course I do love it when others can relate- well, I hate it in a way that anyone else actually feels this way but it is nice to know you're not alone.
So I have finally gone back to work after 6 weeks off due to anxiety/panic/agora. My first day back went well and I was so glad to be back - I really love my job. ( Ironically, I am an RN on an acute psychiatric ward). It is great to be able to help and understand people who have dealt with some of the same issues as I have and I think it makes me a better nurse.
Anyways, I was supposed to work today so I prepared yesterday- got up early so I'd be tired enough to sleep early last night, did stuff, exercised, etc. I did not feel anxious about going to work today and fell asleep probably just before 10 last night. I work 12 hour shifts so I really need my sleep. So I woke up at 2:30am and COULD NOT for the life of me get back to sleep! I took extra Clonazepam, counted, tried to meditate, watched TV, etc. NOTHING helped. I made the very difficult decision to call in sick because I am tired often anyways on 8-9 hours of sleep without working, so I knew I would have an extrememly hard time working on 4 and a half hours. So now I feel like a loser, failure, etc. I can only imagine my co-workers must think I have no work ethic and will dread to work with me because they know I am unreliable and they have to pick up the slack when someone is not there if the shift cannot be filled by someone else. It is such a gossipy place anyways and I do not want to be known as a bad worker because that's really not me- or at least I used to think it wasn't.
Does this happen to anyone else? Thanks for taking the time to read this.
So I have finally gone back to work after 6 weeks off due to anxiety/panic/agora. My first day back went well and I was so glad to be back - I really love my job. ( Ironically, I am an RN on an acute psychiatric ward). It is great to be able to help and understand people who have dealt with some of the same issues as I have and I think it makes me a better nurse.
Anyways, I was supposed to work today so I prepared yesterday- got up early so I'd be tired enough to sleep early last night, did stuff, exercised, etc. I did not feel anxious about going to work today and fell asleep probably just before 10 last night. I work 12 hour shifts so I really need my sleep. So I woke up at 2:30am and COULD NOT for the life of me get back to sleep! I took extra Clonazepam, counted, tried to meditate, watched TV, etc. NOTHING helped. I made the very difficult decision to call in sick because I am tired often anyways on 8-9 hours of sleep without working, so I knew I would have an extrememly hard time working on 4 and a half hours. So now I feel like a loser, failure, etc. I can only imagine my co-workers must think I have no work ethic and will dread to work with me because they know I am unreliable and they have to pick up the slack when someone is not there if the shift cannot be filled by someone else. It is such a gossipy place anyways and I do not want to be known as a bad worker because that's really not me- or at least I used to think it wasn't.
Does this happen to anyone else? Thanks for taking the time to read this.