Callisto
15-09-08, 21:59
So I seem to be go through these phases of anxiety. It started with concerns about having a million and one illnesses, now it's moved on to just death in general. I keep thinking something awful is going to happen, a nuclear bomb, global warming, terrorist attack, which have always been vague worries but they used to just go away after a few minutes and I would get on with my life.
Now I just think about them all the time, every day, its the first thing I think about when I wake up and the last thing when I go to sleep. I think about what it will be like to die, and sometimes I feel like I'm cracking up. Little things like driving in a car somewhere, I wonder if it will crash etc etc. I'm carrying on with everything, doing all the normal stuff, acting in the normal way, but underneath I feel horrible 24/7
I don't want to talk about it with anyone, because I worry I might transfer my fears to them and I wouldn't want anyone I care about to feel this way. It's taken me ages to decide to write this because I feel the same about people on here, I don't want to worry them. But sometimes I just have to get it out.
Anyways.... rant over.
Now I just think about them all the time, every day, its the first thing I think about when I wake up and the last thing when I go to sleep. I think about what it will be like to die, and sometimes I feel like I'm cracking up. Little things like driving in a car somewhere, I wonder if it will crash etc etc. I'm carrying on with everything, doing all the normal stuff, acting in the normal way, but underneath I feel horrible 24/7
I don't want to talk about it with anyone, because I worry I might transfer my fears to them and I wouldn't want anyone I care about to feel this way. It's taken me ages to decide to write this because I feel the same about people on here, I don't want to worry them. But sometimes I just have to get it out.
Anyways.... rant over.