lostsoul08
17-09-08, 17:48
I am a 25 year old male who has always been shy, but i truely believe it's gone way beyond just normal shyness and i don't know what to do.
I cannot cope in being in any situation where they might be people around, as a result i don't work yet my family and friends think i do as i just leave the house and wander around all day. I won't even go out with my friends anymore because i just can't take it. It's been like this for the past few yearsd but is gradually getting worse and worse.
Now i can't even walk down a street without thinking every little noise i hear or voice i hear is someone talking about me, and even at home i sit with the curtains drawn when i can because i feel like people are looking in at me.
I think im anxious, paranoid and delusional all in one and i really don't know what to do about it.
I've always thought against going to doctors as i don't want to be someone who has to rely on medication to feel ok and i hear there are alot of side effects but really i don't what what to do.
I am lying to everyone and it's become harder and harder,I realise that i definitely need help but admitting that im this weak is very hard.
I fear my family and friends would be so dissapointed if i admit that i haven't been working all this time and they may just think im work shy or lazy which is so not the case as the lengths i go to to keep up this charade is work enough in itself.
There are so many factors that contribute to my shyness and social awkwardness, one being that despite being 25 i have very boyish looks of a 14 year old, women don't take me seriously. The only people that are attracted to me are girls that are too young for me because they assume that im their age. I've only ever had one girlfriend.
I fear it will never change.
I cannot cope in being in any situation where they might be people around, as a result i don't work yet my family and friends think i do as i just leave the house and wander around all day. I won't even go out with my friends anymore because i just can't take it. It's been like this for the past few yearsd but is gradually getting worse and worse.
Now i can't even walk down a street without thinking every little noise i hear or voice i hear is someone talking about me, and even at home i sit with the curtains drawn when i can because i feel like people are looking in at me.
I think im anxious, paranoid and delusional all in one and i really don't know what to do about it.
I've always thought against going to doctors as i don't want to be someone who has to rely on medication to feel ok and i hear there are alot of side effects but really i don't what what to do.
I am lying to everyone and it's become harder and harder,I realise that i definitely need help but admitting that im this weak is very hard.
I fear my family and friends would be so dissapointed if i admit that i haven't been working all this time and they may just think im work shy or lazy which is so not the case as the lengths i go to to keep up this charade is work enough in itself.
There are so many factors that contribute to my shyness and social awkwardness, one being that despite being 25 i have very boyish looks of a 14 year old, women don't take me seriously. The only people that are attracted to me are girls that are too young for me because they assume that im their age. I've only ever had one girlfriend.
I fear it will never change.