abbie
23-05-05, 21:47
Hi,
I am so relieved to discover this website and read all your stories. I think I have always had a mild anxiety disorder but just assumed this was my "personality".I first went to a doctor when I started having panic attacks and thought I must be going mad/becoming schizophrenic about 10 years ago. He thought I might be struggling to accept myself as a lesbian- I'm not and I wouldn't have considered that a problem anyway! The panic attacks stopped after a couple of years. Then I had the swallowing problem- again I didn't find a sympathetic GP. They sent me for tests and discovered there was nothing physically wrong with my throat- little comfort to me. Eventually that resolved itself but the counsellor I saw during that time made me dwell on my childhood and wonder if I had suffered any form of abuse which was to blame for my current state. This was untrue but I still ponder about it and feel guilty for doing so.
I hoped I might grow out of my anxiety. My obsessive, irrational and catastrophic thoughts don't interfere with my work so I have never been forced to do anything about it. However, now I am 28 and I don't want to put up with this anymore. I am nervous in traffic jams, in the countryside, on boats/planes, and sometimes for no clear reason at all.Also I can't imagine how I would ever be able to have children if I carry on worrying about things (e.g.dying) all the time. My boyfriend is wonderful but can't really understand how I feel.I have asked my GP to refer me for CBT but she thinks the mental health service in our area is only for severe cases eg suicidal. Otherwise it seems to be between £50 and £100 per hour which is a lot of money if you need 10 sessions, but worth it if I can stop my thoughts I suppose.
I hope I have written this in the right section. Thanks.
Abbie
I am so relieved to discover this website and read all your stories. I think I have always had a mild anxiety disorder but just assumed this was my "personality".I first went to a doctor when I started having panic attacks and thought I must be going mad/becoming schizophrenic about 10 years ago. He thought I might be struggling to accept myself as a lesbian- I'm not and I wouldn't have considered that a problem anyway! The panic attacks stopped after a couple of years. Then I had the swallowing problem- again I didn't find a sympathetic GP. They sent me for tests and discovered there was nothing physically wrong with my throat- little comfort to me. Eventually that resolved itself but the counsellor I saw during that time made me dwell on my childhood and wonder if I had suffered any form of abuse which was to blame for my current state. This was untrue but I still ponder about it and feel guilty for doing so.
I hoped I might grow out of my anxiety. My obsessive, irrational and catastrophic thoughts don't interfere with my work so I have never been forced to do anything about it. However, now I am 28 and I don't want to put up with this anymore. I am nervous in traffic jams, in the countryside, on boats/planes, and sometimes for no clear reason at all.Also I can't imagine how I would ever be able to have children if I carry on worrying about things (e.g.dying) all the time. My boyfriend is wonderful but can't really understand how I feel.I have asked my GP to refer me for CBT but she thinks the mental health service in our area is only for severe cases eg suicidal. Otherwise it seems to be between £50 and £100 per hour which is a lot of money if you need 10 sessions, but worth it if I can stop my thoughts I suppose.
I hope I have written this in the right section. Thanks.
Abbie