driving on my own.

[Davvid]

Hi, I think I wrote a thread in the wrong place so sorry about that.
I think I have a phobia of driving on my own in the car especially at night. It seems to have got worse lately .
I told my friend I'd go down to her house tonight but I'm really scared of the drive home. I'm afraid I'll have a panic attack on the way.
She lives about 14 miles from me and part of the journey is along a dark windy road. I hope nobody minds if I write this. It makes me feel like a nuisance.
I've been worrying about it so much I feel sick now.
Dave.

[JasonB]

What part of the drive is it that makes you fearful?

Is it just having a Panic Attack?

I have phobias, and situation where I feel the same. However, driving at night, and through windy country roads is something I love.

[Missy69]

Hiya David,
Im exactly the same, i do feel terrible if i have to out on my own, well the truth is i dont anymore, i always have to have some one with me. I know what i need to do and thats to just do it and face the fear,i am just not brave enough yet ! But good for you because your not backing out, why dont you just go and do it, and then you can come back and tell me how bad it really wasnt !!! in all seriousness i do know how you feel, but think if you can, then dont cancel, you will be so proud when you have done it and also its another huge step into recovery. Please let me know how you got on. Could you not talk to some one on hands free maybe ? when you hit the darkwindy patch ? Hope it goes well for , take care Sarah x

[keepemlaughing]

I hope that you went for your trip to see your friend. 14 miles is not that far. I wish you well.

[ElizabethJane]

I have fear about driving although I do drive. I worry about driving even short distances. Here are my tips for a fairly stressfree night. Some of these things might seem a bit excessive so here goes: I always make sure I have enough petrol to make both journeys ( our car makes an awful bleeping sound when it goes on the red and that makes me panicky. Keep a flask of black coffee so if you pull over abd feel sleepy you can have some. A bottle of water is useful. Arrange a time to leave and stick by it. My problem was feeling too tired to drive back and that would cause panic. When you approach the dark windy bit find some music or for me a late night talk programme to keep me awake. If you feel the panic rising affirmations are good you casn make you own up for example 'I'm a calm an confident driver' If you need to stop stop but find somewhere safe to do it. Take a few deep breaths and some sips of water and continue on your journey. I always have my RAC card to hand and my mobile but obviously do not use it. I have only once broken down in the middle of nowhere and it wasn't too bad. Try to remain positive recognise the negative feelings and then try to move on. Hope it goes well. Ps don't drink any alcohol.

[bab]

Hi There

you are not on your own I also panic when driving - i used to love driving on my own and listening to music - in the last year I get really panicy - even going round the corner

[orangeblossom]

I guess there are lots of things you could do on the way home to help you stay calm and relaxed - listen to a 'talk' radio which you can get so engrossed in that you forget about your anxiety (i know this might sound a bit too good to be true, but i have found that it has helped me lots and lots of times), listening to audiobooks has the same thing.

Also - have a 'safe' person that you trust and could speak to if you do begin to panic. Obviously you would stop the car, keep the doors locked and lights on, if you call that person. Sometimes just knowing that you can call someone immediately if you begin to panic helps you get past the panic and keep on driving.

Time your journey to her house - and know that if you can get there, you can absolutely get back home safely. And, that 20mins or so, will not last for ever. It is finite.

All the best - I am sure we will all be wishing you the best and thinking of you.

[Davvid]

Thanks to all of you for your responses. It is a big help just to know I can share my fears.
I've been like this on and off for years. I can be ok for a while and then for some reason it starts again.
I'd been to my friend's house one day and on the way home I suddenly felt afraid. I think it may have been because I was tired. I had a panic attack and horrible thoughts kept going around in my mind.
Since then it seems to have got worse but I know I'll overcome it like I did before. It's a big help being able to 'talk' about it to people who understand. I've never done this before.
Anyway thanks to you all and I'm going to try it again next Friday.