FEAR.....

[jill]

Hi all :D:hugs:

I am looking for some answers ( don't really want to say why at the mo)


I have been reading about fear trying to learn things about it, I have read that fear does not exsist anywhere eccept in our minds. Fear is a creation of our minds, as we grow and learn about the world, we can learn to fear things, but we can allso learn NOT to fear things.

I would like your input on this or if you can point me in the right direction for getting this info.

Is is possible, for a 1 month old baby to cry with fear, (may have been younger) I mean, scream sooo much you can tell they are in fear, all because a curtain moved? I know, I know this may sound silly to you all, you will all look for other reasons why a baby would scream like this, BUT, at that time. I was not on my own with the baby, My Mum, was there too and thought it was soooo strange. I remember it sooo well, eveyone in the cafe looked at us, the screams where soooo fearfull. Is this possible, I thought a small baby would not know how to fear, what do you all think?

I am looking into panic disorders, children who are born like this, in there make up to be this way ( don't really want to go into detail right now)

It would be nice to have your oppinon on this, OR if you feel that you have had panic disorder all your life and I mean ALL from dot, so to speak.

Thank you for reading :D:hugs:

TAKE CARE ALL

Wishing you all well:hugs:

LOVE JILLXXX

[Anxious_gal]

I think fear is intstint, the baby might have screamed because something big moved, it was probably a natural reaction.
i do think there is learned fear and then natural fear, like if something big moved towards you n you saw it out of the coner of your eye you would naturally jump out of the way before you had a chance to think.
anxiety is learned fear i belive so are panic attacks.
if we didnt fear a panic attack then they wouldnt be so bad and wouldnt last as long

[Quiet-Lift]

Hi Jill

Have you ever read Dorothy Rowe's book 'Beyond Fear?'.
She points out that some kinds of fear are necessary because they keep us out of danger.

I think fear is more than just a product of our minds. It's also physiological and is deeply rooted within each one of us. Therefore it is impossible to get rid of.

The kind of fear which we can get rid of is the kind that motivates so many of us to use this site. This is the kind of fear which is inappropriate and causes us to put up defences like Phobias or Depression or Panic Attacks in order to cope with it.

You may not agree with this but I must stress that these are not my ideas.

By the way, all the best with your reading. I think it's admirable for anyone to tackle such a complex and fundamental topic like fear. There is so much denial out there. No one is immune from fear but so many seem to pretend or act out a kind of bravura fearlessness which can be dangerous.

All the best:)

[LeeBee]

Some thought-provoking posts here.

I agree with what the others have said. Fear is not in and of itself a bad thing; it is an evolved response and is necessary to our survival in many circumstances. We wouldn't be here had our ancestors not been afraid of large animals with sharp teeth, poisonous spiders and running around in the dark. It is also natural to be cautious or fearful of something that we are not familiar with, for the very good reason that it allows us to ascertain whether or not it can harm us. I think it is common for some children to be fearful of new things for this reason. In very young children this is almost certainly instinctive. In older children it might be learned from the adults around them.

It is when, as Allan says, fear is inappropriate that it can be harmful to us.
I think that the reasons why some people are inappropriately fearful are varied. There is probably an element of genetics involved, along with environment, upbringing and physiological and/or psychological problems.

It's an interesting one. Good luck with your reading.

[jill]

Hi Mishel :D:hugs:

Thank you soo much for your reply :D

**I think fear is intstint,**

Yes hun, I allso think this too, but, when you are told when your daugther is just 6 years old and it all started when she was just 3 years old, NO. other reasons for panic, anxiety, that it is in her make up to be this way, she will either, learn to live with it, OR grow out of it, Mmm, this does have you thinking. she has done sooo well over the years, had a blip 2 years ago, ( will not go into that but she got better) now she is having another blip, 15 years old (panic disorder, fear of panic) I know it is soooooo DAME HARD not to fear panic.

I allso know oh sooo well about learned behavour, when my daughters problem started WE as a family NEVER new what was wrong with her, her symptoms, where soooo across the board, her main symptoms was vomitting, so, test after test after test, all came back normal, the hospitals where sooo comfused why this was happining, so WE as a family treated her the best way we new how, BUT, unknowing to us, we FEED her learned behavour, we let her stop doing thing, BECAUSE we did not know what we where doing, we thought, AT THE TIME, we were helping, Mmm, do you understand? so yes, I DO KNOW about learend behavour, BUT, I allso know how to change that behavour, over time,.

We as a family had to try and undo, ALL that panic, had done to her, learn her how to feel safe, WITH HERSELF, this was not easy, it took along time, BUT SHE DID IT and I am sooo proud of her. She is hitting a blip right now and I feel sooooo angry at times, that she has to go through this. I can help her get better again, I know I can, BUT I DO feel for her and my heart breaks :weep:

**if we didnt fear a panic attack then they wouldnt be so bad and wouldnt last as long**

This is soooo true, I never new what my daughter went through when she was young, untill many, many years later, I had pa's, high anxiety myself, IT IS dame HARD NOT to fear panic. I am panic, high anxiety free because of this great site, so yes, I do know its possible to get better, BUT, it IS SOOOO DAME HARD.

Thank you again for your reply, it was so nice of you.

YOU TAKE CARE

LOVE JILLXXX

[Carol27]

Hunny, what i do know is that babies are born with two fears, one a fear of falling, that is why when the drs do the checks and pretend to drop them a little way their arms stretch out and they go rigid, the other fear is of loud noise. Hope that helps Hunny, love Carol xx

[jill]

Hi Allan :D:hugs:

Its nice of you to take time to reply to my thread.

I have read a hell of alot about panic, anxiety, my mind is awash with it all, so to speak.

Allthough I am panic, high anxiety free and even now, I have NEVER EVER felt fear like I'd felt when in panic mode or high anxiety mode, panic, anxiety and fear, is such a complexed thing to understand, we may have all the same symptoms, BUT, what is keeping it there for each and everyone who suffers is different, Mmm, well this is what I believe.

Of course we all have fear within us, BUT, we can learn coping skills to keep those fears from rising to an impossible levels to deal with. I have seen my daughter go through sooo much fear when she was young, YET, she learned soo much and that high fear stopped, Mmmm, but now, its back again, that why I am looking into things more, BUT, I do feel that for my daugther she has MORE things to learn and one of them is, NOT to fear panic, BUT, I KNOW, that this IS DAME HARD.

Thank you again for your reply :hugs:

YOU TAKE CARE

LOVE JILLXX

[jill]

Hi less bee :D:hugs:

Thank you for taking the time to reply :D

I did pick up on this on your reply

**There is probably an element of genetics involved,**

I have been told when she was young it was in her make up to be this way, there was NOTHING going on in her life at that time to cause panic, anxiety, apart from going to nursery for the first time. I did think, separation anxiety, but I am finding it hard to believe this, only because befor nursery, she would go with anyone, she was such a confidant and happy child, she would stay in my sisters and mums house, without me, anytime, Mmm, just looking into things to try and find out where all this started. Mayve I will never know.

I do know, what she is left with now, is memories of panic ( I feel that panic, IS truma ) and I feel, thats why it pops up from time to time, so I feel we NEED to work on this, FORGET about the past, just work on whats happing now and why, Mmm, I know why, but find it sooo hard to explain to my daughter the knowledge this great site has given me.

She is 15 now and has a strong mind of her own, she wishes to deal with this with the support of her family, NO thearpy, I am going on her wishes right now, SHE IS moving forward again, but it does take time. I do feel that she needs some form of thearpy regarding learning about panic anxiety, but she will not do this right now. SHE WILL get better.

Thank you again for taking the time to reply, it was soo nice of you.

TAKE CARE

LOVE JILLXX

[jill]

Hi Carol :D:hugs:

Ohh that was soo helpfull, thank you soo much for taking the time to reply :hugs:

YOU TAKE CARE

LOVE JILLXXX