View Full Version : work problem
Hi All
Some of you might be aware Ive started a new job recently, I left my last one due to my anxiety as it was quite a stressful job. Well my new job I thought would be less stressful, I was horribly wrong it is worse its in a really posh country hotel, I work on reception. Last week I had a man screaming at me because he did not like his hotel room I kept apologising to him and he practically laid the blame on me!, and then the next day the manager who is scary anyway he shouts at everyone, practically blamed it on me and was talking to me like crap in front of other people!, Theres so much to do and I dont think I can do it-I cant leave my job though as I have debt, house with my fiance but deep down Im not comfortable in this job I can feel my anxiety escalating again rapidly, My manager makes me feel panicky as soon as he comes towards me and Im feeling ill again, I really think Ive gone back to work too soon, Im going on my hols to greece for 2 weeks in a weeks time so Im trying to stick it out until then, but today I just feel so worried and anxious about going to work and I feel like I may cry any minute but if I start I wont stop....X
hi Kirgray,
Sorry to hear about the job. Could you not stick it out for a while just while you find a better one?
Sarah :D
You poor love - how dare these people shout at you but that says more about them than it does you.
Try and imagine you are in a big bubble and all shouting or stuff just bounces back off the bubble so you are protected.
Imagine too we are all with you behind the desk - cos we are in spirit.
Paul Mckenna said to imagine people with a micky mouse nose and make them small and far away from you and see how powerful they look then.
You are doing brilliantly and if your brilliance isnt appreciated there then I hope you can get a job somewhere else.
Love Piglet:D
Thank you Sarah & Piglet for your replies
I really feel awful today Ive got pains everywhere and Im so exhausted, I feel like I really cant face work Ive just had a cry to my fiance on the phone he must be sick to death of me as Ive had so many jobs, but its because I worry that people will see my anxiety and also I feel that I can not handle a job with the way I am feeling, I am going to try your ideas Piglet , I hope I dont lean across and try and honk there Micky mouse nose!
Oh hun, so sorry to hear that your manager is so nasty! I like Piglets suggestion about the Mickey Mouse nose...may try that myself! You mentioned that you are worried that people will see your anxiety...I started a new job when I was EXTREMELY anxious. I was constantly sweating, having to use the loo, and my hands were shaking uncontrollably (had to hold my coffee cup with two hands, and even then they would shake as I was putting it back down). I felt like a freak and thought that there was no way they couldn't tell. Well, I talked to the person I had been working with all week, and mentioned something about how I was out of sorts as I'm sure he could tell, and he said he hadn't noticed a thing!!!!! So try not to worry about this as much, I'm sure you feel a million times worse than you appear.
Are you taking rescue remedy and lavender with you to work? May be helpful to get you through the week. If you're heading to Greece so soon, can you just tell yourself that you just have to make it a few more days, then you're off for a fabulous holiday??? You've madeit this far, you just have too hang on a few more days, and is that really that hard in the scheme of things?
Hope things get better at work, when you're stressing just think about the beautiful beaches that await you very very soon!!!
xxxLisa
Hi Kirsty,
how has your day been? I hope you've started to feel a little bit better. And i hope you did actually honk the mickey mouse nose!! I hate managers who talk to people like that-theres no reason for it. I guess maybe he has his own problems-just think at least you dont have to go to bed at night knowing you've been a right **** to people all day!
I really hope you manage to stick it out and i hope you get treated with the respect you deserve. Also i hope you have an amazing holiday and forget all about your silly boss!!
Em xxx
Well after much thought of not wanting to go to work I made myself go in, it was hard but I was glad I did it.....but half way through the night my **** of a manager raised his ugly head again, we had a wedding on and a waitress had spilt french mustard down some ladys posh suit jacket, it had been brought to reception by my manager I smiled at him as he walked up and he kicked off and accused me of laughing!!I said I wasnt at all I had smiled because thats what I do when I see someone!and he said I had a big smirk on my face and to wipe it off!!well I got dead shaky wound up, and had a crap day anyway and for this to happen I thought I dont need this!!am i looking to deeply into it?
Is there anyway you can stick it out until you get a new job?
it sounds as though you don't really like the work but if I was you I'd put in a complaint about the manager he must have a superior and he shouldn't be speaking to you like that. Just keep thinking about your holiday and the relaxing time you're gona have. Hope things improve for you, best of luck.
Hi Hun
When you went back i thought you had cracked it but readng your post you dont need that and i feel for you as you took a big step to get back to it.
Sorry it has being so hard, they obviously dont appreciate you at all.
How can we help you?
Love Sal xx
Dont mess up the best things in your life, just because at present you are unsure who you are.
Sal I just want to explain how I am feeling as I feel so sorry for my boyf I constantly whinge to him, Ive had so many jobs and I think its because deep down I dont have a lot of confidence in what I do Im always worried that Ive done things wrong as people in the past have put me down with my work and if you have been put down you can start to believe what people say about you!. I still dont feel right within myself anyway am still dizzy, headaches, chest pains and feeling anxious and that itself is a battle for me but for someone to speak to me like that just makes it worse, I just dont need it right now, Ive been told not to take it personally as he speaks to everyone like that, but unfortunatley I am a very sensitive person and at the moment I dont feel strong enough to handle it. I will put up with it until I find a new job
[Sigh...] and counting down until I get on that much deserved beach!!
Hi Kirgray,
Sorry you are going through such a bad time at work hun. I know how you feel I ended up getting another job because my manager was so very rude and intimidating and run me down so much. The trouble was she knew i wouldn't stand up to her so she gave me even more grief! Then when I got another job and left she left a few weeks later typical huh!
Maybe you could approach our manager and explain how you feel? If it doesn't get better just look for another job if you can stick it out until you find something else then at least you don't have to worry about your income.
I do hope you manage to sort something out and you have a wonderful relaxing holiday in Greece!
Take care,
Love PIP'S XX
You deserve a holiday and i hope you have a great time.
You took a big step and went back to work, so look at the positively as many cant even contemplate taking that step let alone doing it.
Plus you are having a hard time but still determined not to give in, that shows the strength you have and when you are ready jump ship and find a job, and many employers will grab you up as they will see you as being positive and so strong.
After you have done so well getting yourself sorted and in such a short time, which we all admire and many of us wish we had sorted ourselves out ready to go back to work in the time you did. Dont let them put you down you are so much better than them and even though you still feel anxious you are not prepared to let them beat you, so what does that say.
To me a strong person that deserves the respect that you give others.
Enjoy your holiday then when you feel up to it do look for other jobs, and remember all the qualities you have to offer. Please dont let them grind you down again.
Love Sal xx
Dont mess up the best things in your life, just because at present you are unsure who you are.
thank you everone for your replies!!.
Sal your reply was amazing and boosted my moral sooooo much and Im so greatful of that right now thank you hun.
Well Im trying to let it go in one ear and out the other, he wasnt in yesterday and I had a good day when he wasnt there!, I wish he'd just climb back into the pile of poo hes come from he he, he asked me to do some print outs today in front of other people and he said I was too slow and couldnt be bothered waiting and went off to get someone else to do it for him!!HELLO Ive been there 3 wks!!!!!!!!!!!!Im still learning the in house system god I just wanted to drop kick him across the room!!!
I dont blame you at all for feeling like that. Stay strong and dont let him get to you. Hes a bully that picks on people he thinks are vunerable and weaker that him, but that is what he thinks. He is the weak one for being so nasty and out of order. Keep a note of what he says and does and you in the end will come off better and you are a lot stronger than he will ever be.
Love Sal xx
Dont mess up the best things in your life, just because at present you are unsure who you are.
Hi Kirgray
Sorry to hear that the job is not going as well as planned.
The problem with being on the front line as it were, is the fact that you are the person people let rip at.
I used to work for the CSA and I hated it.
Where's my money!? You useless bunch of [}:)][:I][:o)][Oops!]:(
I'm going to come down to your office and kill the lot of you! ... etc.
So even though the fault is not yours, you are the one who gets it in the neck.
My advice is to remain calm and polite. I know it is hard. But by yelling and shouting it gets you nowhere.
Try to stick at the job if you can, and in the meantime, keep your eyes open for a better one.
good luck hun.
Love, light and Best wishes
Liz xxx
With hard work and determination and all the things you know.
The world is there for you to take. There's nowhere you can't go.
[:p]Scatty Eccentric & 'Poet Laureate to panic and anxiety'
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