Please Help

[ednfiles]

Hi my name is Alan I am 36.For the last 4 years I have had very bad depression which has stopped me for working for the last 2 years.Last week I found out my mother (who I have not seen for years) has full blown Huntingtons and is going to die soon she is only 55.Since then I have done some research on the illness and found out that depression is one of the first signs of the illness.

Since I have found out I have felt really bad and keep thinking I am showing signs of the illness.My legs keep twitching and I very anxious all the time.I keep thinking that this is the first sign of the chorea.But as my brother and sister have pointed out I was showing no signs until I found out last week about my mother having it.Please can someone help calm me down as I feel I cant cope any more.

[keepemlaughing]

You can start exhibiting signs of an illness just by reading about it. Or at least I did. It took a long time, but that finally stopped. I still suffer from anxiety and depression but not as much and not as often. I hope you feel better soon. I am sorry about your mom. At least you can be there for her in the end.
Blessings,
Sheryl

[marie1974]

hiya and welcome to nmp, well when my nan got ill and died 3 yrs ago, i convinced myself after that i had cancer like her, she died of bone and stomach cancer, i had read up on it and googled it and made myself a nervous wreck.

before all of this is was fine and didnt worry so much, i had health anxiety for ages after and had panic attacks over things that i thought i had, it was awful.

i think hun that your mothers illness has obviously concerned u and because you have researched it and now prob know too much, you are worrying about yourself and panicking.

depression does not help either with thoughts, i had bad dep 7 yrs back and only recovered and got off prozac through regular exercise.

please remember that u were fine before knowin this and that the mind playing funny games and u need to distract yourself when u have these thoughts and try to keep busy, doing anything, cleaning, sorting, talking, cooking wotever until it passes, you will get through this and we will all hellp u here and support you.

nmp is a great forum and has helped me lots and has some very nice genuine people on here. hugs to u xx

[minihaha]

HI Alan, i'm sorry to hear of the news of your mum, this is a lot for you to get your head round, especially as you have not seen her for a long time. Easier said than done, i know but you have to remind yourself that this diagnosis has been given to your mum and not you. Googling symptons when in a fragile state of mind is the worst thing any of us can do.........and yes i do it constantly so i should really practice what i preach i guess.....

Your health, both physical and mental is as important as your mums and you will need strength for the time that lies ahead. Remind yourself and tell yourself that your anxiety levels at the moment are due to reacting to this devastating news.

I wish you and your family well and hope you get some support to see you through this, you sound like you have done really well to get back to work after your own depression. I hope you find the right balance of supporting your mum, whilst at the same time having some time and support for you

best wishes
K x

[ednfiles]

Thanks guys:yesyes: its only when I am on my own I get the nervous twitches in the legs and think about huntingtons when I with people or chatting Im fine and dont get any twitches.Only when I am on my own do I get panicy and nervous