View Full Version : Focusing on worst case scenario's
There is one thing that has my anxiety kicking in when I have been fine.
There was a time when the odd palpitation had me convinced I was about to drop dead, or a mere headache was a precurser to a swift and impending end.
For the most part, these health fears are behind me now, almost overcome save for the odd day.
I run my own modest little business and when me and my crew come across a project where a certain part requires specialist input, I acquire the services of sub-contractors.
I have an issue that may have caused a problem at a clients premises through the workmanship of an appointed sub-contractor ( I won't bore you with the details) and potentially, worst case it could cost someone a lot of money to sort (and more importantly reputation).
That is worst case, and I am pretty sure deep down that this issue will be minor and easily rectified.
My point though is the anxiety that comes with this lack of control I have over this situation. I can't do much about this now, infact this will probably not get resolved until the end of the week but I can't seem to relax and accept there is no more to do until then.
Can I put it to the back of my mind? No. I am constantly drifting into what if's? and worst case, which is all contributing to my head spinning, tight chest, and lack of sleep.
It has brought it to light that I am not as far down the anxiety free path as I thought I was, and I am frustrated that I can't put this to the back of my mind until it can be dealt with.
What's more, I know that once this is dealt with, there will be another issue, then another that will always send me into a thinking frenzy.
Not quite sure what I am expecting by getting this down but I just wish I could put problems in a little hole until it was the right time to resolve them.
Hiya m8y ......
dont be hard on yourself about constant thinking about it ...I truely believe even some1 without anxiety would feel the same ......you have come so far and you are allowed 2 have normal anxiety ..anxiety that everyday people have .......xxx
I hope you are ok m8 and try and get some a gud nights kip x
It has brought it to light that I am not as far down the anxiety free path as I thought I was, and I am frustrated that I can't put this to the back of my mind until it can be dealt with.
What's more, I know that once this is dealt with, there will be another issue, then another that will always send me into a thinking frenzy.
Not quite sure what I am expecting by getting this down but I just wish I could put problems in a little hole until it was the right time to resolve them.
Yep I know exactly where you're coming from. I also thought I was far down the anxiety free path too,.. no idea what happened :ohmy:, the last few weeks have been just terrible, the panic, shaking, fear, depersonalisation, confusion the lot.
Unfortunately, I haven't many words of advice, but I do know that writing down your feelings like you have here helps a great deal.
Take it easy :flowers:
hiya mate, i have to agree with titch that even with out all the anxiety people would still worry, u come a long way and u are doing great, just try to relax and not think too much (not easy i know)
you have a lot of support here and u make us all giggle with your witty posts, u gonna be just fine kiddo. hugs xxxx
Cheers titch, Katie, Donna x
Yes I suppose anxiety is a normal reaction to a dodgy situation, but workwise I tend to do this alot.
Possibly it's just the makeup of a person predisposed to anxiety.
I could never rob a bank, the anxiety waiting to see if I got caught would kill me lol
ty x
honeybee3939
13-10-08, 22:04
Hi Jaco
Like the others have stated i think everyone suffers with anxiety when it comes to stress at work.
My husband as been stressed out all weekend because of work(and he says he dosnt suffer from stress), he hasnt slept had the tight chest and its all brought on by the stress of work and tight deadlines.:ohmy:
Im sure people in employment today have a lot more stress with thier work load than years gone by.
Love
:hugs: :hugs:
Andrea
xxxx
Ps.if you do rob a bank, please can i be on your friends list:winks:
Lol Jaco I agree with bank job ........Id be takin a diazepam and asking for a glass of water while holdin my rescue remedy in other hand .....then spend my life not spending the money as 2 anxious incase I got caught ........hence thats why im a skint single mom picking up pennies of the street .......oh that last comment is bit 2 much info ..its my daughter that does that ...........honest xxxxxxxxxxxxx
Yer i think u are right honey.
since doing that post I have been bed, back up an hour later and climbing the walls with anxiety, and already stressing, I am shattered and need to be up later.
I don't get many panics these days, but I sure as hell dont miss them
Hiya m8y ....
Hope you are feeling better today .......:hugs:
What's more, I know that once this is dealt with, there will be another issue, then another that will always send me into a thinking frenzy.
Gosh now that one sentence has just about summed up life in general really for all of us hasn't it, whether it be financial issues, health issues, work issues or a big variation of issues. We will deal with one and it won't be long before another pops up.
Now of course me being me Jaco you know damn well what I am gonna come back with and that is the whole living in the present moment or mindfulness stuff, or put even more simply 'not facing bridges till you come to them'. I know this is so hard to do but so worth persuing!
Eg: you know that you have done all that you can possibly do about this work situation for the moment and yes it makes sense to examine possible outcomes but not in your head do that on paper. Once you have done that and in the clear knowledge that you have done all that is possible at this juncture you then have to let it go.
It's not a case of trying not to think about it it's a case of commonsense - how does you worrying and fretting over it influence the outcome, will it benefit the outcome in some way?????
If you can try to concentrate just on what you are doing at any given moment it will pay dividends I promise. We can't change what has gone past and we can only influence the future in so much as influencing the moment that we are in can't we!
I had a filling at the dentist today which normally causes me great worry and angst because 1. I'm scared, 2. I'm moderately agoraphobic. I ususally have millions of what if's long before I ever get to an event but the more and more I am practising mindfulness the less and less this is happening.
I've known I needed this filling for about 6 weeks and I have barely thought about it once because I have been focussing just on the day that I am in. It's been such a novel experience for me not to be fretting and because of that even when I went today I didn't feel too bad (it was a big filling).
Even if I had panicked at the dentist I would still be pleased at the achievement of not worrying for 6 weeks - that is such a step forward for me.:yesyes:
I don't mean that example to be patronising because I know that it isn't really on parr with a very important business decisions that have implications but I just wanted to illustrate the point.
I do have a much bigger financial issue to fret over if I want one and decsions I make now in that regard could really influence my future HOWEVER I am trying to apply the same procedure with this too or I too will be pacing the bedroom floor at 3 in the morning and I am just soooo fed up of doing that!!!!:shades:
Love Piglet :flowers:
Hey Jaco,
I hope you are feeling better. Things will work out fine. You can't control the work other people did but you will find a way to sort it out...you're a smart man you will find a way to solve the issue so try not to fret too much.
Lila xx
Jaco, sorry to hear that you're having this stress at work, and hope it resolves itself soon.
Take care
Cath xxx
Hey all cheers xx for the replies
Well after next to no sleep then a 60 mile drive it all got sorted kinda. It's going to end up with someone being landed a 2 grand bill (1st stop me but I am passing it on like a friggin hot potato).
There will be a few emails flying but it ill die down. Ironically, I got a call about doing more work after a client was impressed with our network install at another site he had seen, swings n roundabouts.
I know what you are saying piglet, I would love to be able to think "I will address it tomorrow, now I am going to relax" but that particular talent evades me at the moment.
Tomorrow I have a meeting with solicitors with 2 other guys I have started a company with to be read some tosh as we have took responsiblilty of an overdraught equating to 25 grand a throw and I really wonder why the hell I do this to myself sometimes.
I am always thinking about the next step or deal or venture, and I am sure it is insecurity that drives me to try anything, but I really don't have the apptitude to control the worry once I make decisions. I tend to dive in then panic about it, all confident at the start then it starts to dwindle away as I think of the Worst Case Scenerio if it goes wrong.
Duncan Bannatyne I ain't lol
Ty all xx
Jaco
Veronica H
14-10-08, 21:38
Hi Jaco
'Possibly it's just the makeup of a person predisposed to anxiety.' I think you might be on to something there. Even if I know I have done all I can about something that is unresolved, I find it hard to get it out of my head, I will run possible scenarios through my mind, it can be exhausting. I hope the problem gets resolved soon.
Veronica
I know what you are saying piglet, I would love to be able to think "I will address it tomorrow, now I am going to relax" but that particular talent evades me at the moment.
Jaco
Hun that's not really it - put like that no one could do it! :lac: We can't force ourselves to relax because that's not relaxing ..... that's forcing. Also relaxing isn't really the aim - unecessary going over and over a problem you can't do any more about than you've already done is the aim!!!
What I am trying to say (and obviously not very well) is after you have taken the action to try and solve the problem and there is nothing more that can be done at present you focus on exactly what you are doing that moment. If you were watching your kids play football for instance then give that your whole attention and not what will be happening the next day - cos you are not in the next day!!
Like anything worthwhile in life it is not a skill learned overnight but an extremely valuable one none the less!
Piglet :flowers:
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