View Full Version : Happy Holiday!!!!!!

06-06-05, 12:16
Hiya all

Said I would report on my week and France and here I am!

What a challenge, 7 nights under canvas, one night in a hotel, over 1000 miles in a car, eight days away from the comfort and safety of home!!!!

We left home last Thursday, and headed to Dover, some three hours later we arrived at teh hotel relaxed and happy. Had a patchy nights sleep but woke happy at 7am and headed to the ferry. I have never liked ferry crossings, however and strangely I had no fear or panic at all, being at sea for 1 & a 1/2 hrs was nothing compaired to some of what I have faced of late!!!

6 hours followed on the drive through Northern france, no hurry back safety zone now! I really enjoyed the drive down and arrived, relaxed, stress free and happy. So far so good, better than I had dared to dream...then OMG - arrived at the campsite which was stunning. We were shown to our tent which had beautiful sea views but...IT WAS ON THE SIDE OF A STEEP HILL. I don't do uphill walking as without fail it brings on panic in me, serious, can't breathe, tight chest panic!!!!! You can imagine my thoughts. To go anywhere, loos, showers, pool, shop etc involved a climb - steep climb. Rob saw the look of fear in my face and said don't worry, just use the car. I just looked at him and said please take me home:(

To shorten this epic, we of course did not go home, I had two choices, do it, or spoil my whole families holiday. I opted to just get on with it. The first walk back from the loos were miserable, but I did survive and over the week pushed and pushed myself to do more and more. I climed the slopes and terraces to the pool, climbed the long steep road to the top of the campsite, climbed three flights of steep steps to use the showers...YEAH!!!! Sometimes were easier than others, if I was distracted - no problem at all but if I was obsessing I usually struggled a bit.

On the whole I had a lovely holiday, functioned well and felt that there were two major success points, the first was I managed to play badminton for 30mins, even worked up a sweat. Felt edgy when I finished as I waited for my heart rate to relax...which it did. The second ...well, We had a view of a place called Forte Le latte from our tent and decided to visit it. We parked in the car park, wondered about a mile or so through the woods turned a sharp bend then to my horror - there it was the Forte about a mile below us down a very steep and winding cliff path!!!!!! I stopped dead in my tracks, fear flooded my body, I started to sweat and shake - no way could I climb back up this path. Rob said, no worries we will just look from here, but my girls were skipping about saying lets go down. NO CHOICE - with grim determination we set of down the tracks. These were narrow dirt tracks so no cars could get down there was only two ways out, steep climb back or helicopter!!!! At the bottom I looked up and immediately burst into tears, certain death I was sure of it. Rob gave me a big hug and said come on hun, you can do it so with no other option we sent the girls on ahead and off we set. I could not look up the tracks as it was just to much to face so I looked at my feet and counted my steps. Half way up we stopped for me to catch my breath and I looked back and was overwhelmed but how far I had already climed. I made Rob video it just so I would believe it. We continued to climb and as I relaxed we ate the distance up and before I knew it we were at the top! WHAT A FEELING.

I only had one proper panic attack which happened on the last night, we went out to a posh restaurant and I started to feel trapped, could not breathe properly and every mouth full of food made my chest tighter and throat lump bigger. I lasted till the girls ate desert then just had to get outside. As soon as I did, everything calmed down great.

So here I am, in one piece an so glad I went. It was the most normal I have felt for ages. I am struggling a bit today though, the throat lump has decided to raise its ugly head again but then again I did partake of a lot of vino yesterday so it is not re

06-06-05, 12:29
Hi Angie , so glad you enjoyed your holiday. You did so well!
Keep it up chuck, onwards and upwards eh!!! lol

Take care

Elaine x

06-06-05, 12:44
Hi Angie,

Well done you did so well hun and conquered your fears. I am so proud of you! Congratulaions to you a great Sucsess!

Glad you enjoyed your hol's.!

Take care,


06-06-05, 12:48
[Wow!] Angie what a wonderful success story!! Well done you!! :D

"Life is too important to take seriously" Corky Siegal

06-06-05, 12:58
HI angie, wow didnt you do well i havent had a holiday for over 10 years and long to go away with my 2 year old granddaughter, every year i think this year i will do it but never do i can only really manage about 20 miles from home and thats in a good spell. So its really good to read your success story and its certainly inspired me to try.
Barb x

06-06-05, 13:44
Hi Angie,
How fantastic, i smiled all the way through, you were fantastic (and your family, of course) you faced all of your fears and came out the other side, yes, you are a great inspiration to others well done you!!!!!

06-06-05, 13:59
You know Angie ,

Sometimes it feels like the universe plays a hand in things..dishes you out a huge challenge but only when it knows you can cope really !!

Very well done indeed.

**if I was distracted - no problem at all but if I was obsessing I usually struggled a bit.** Guess this proved a point again and again ..

and the difficult bit you did in manageable chunks - so well done for doing it - going one step up the hill at a time


Watch your thoughts, they become your words...
Watch your words, they become your actions... Watch your actions, they become your habits... Watch your habits, they become your character... Watch your character, it becomes your destiny...

06-06-05, 14:11
Hello everyone - thank you for your encouragement.

Indeed, I kept reminding myself whilst relaxing that it was only a couple of months ago that I could not even get to the end of the road without a panic attack and yet here I was 500 miles from home - relaxed and happy.

One day and one step at a time I guess [^]

I am going to do one thing a day that challenges me, try to keep this momentum going now.

Take care all...Angie

06-06-05, 14:33
Hey Angie,

Just wanted to say well done. That was a great achievement! Lets hope there are many more to come!!

tracy x x

06-06-05, 15:05
I hate hills too!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Well done to you for dealing with all the bits you didn't like. Fab

Love Piglet

"Supposing a tree fell down, Pooh, when we were underneath it?" said Piglet.
"Supposing it didn't," said Pooh after careful thought.

06-06-05, 18:18
good for you angie!

you did brilliantly for getting through your holiday.. a huge step on your road to recovery!!

well done,

06-06-05, 18:36
Well done Angie, love Alexis

06-06-05, 19:14

Just wanted to add my congratulations to you for managing the holiday and facing your fear of steep hills etc.

A big well done to you :D[Yeah!]


"Nearly all happiness comes into our lives through doors we don't even remember leaving open"

07-06-05, 00:00
Well done Angie.


It is not easy to find happiness in ourselves, and it is not possible to find it elsewhere.