Bill
22-10-08, 16:15
When we have a fear of dogs, we have to allow ourselves to gradually get nearer until we can touch and smooth one to overcome our fear.
In reverse, when we approach a dog, it can snarl, bark and try to bite because it has always been mistreated by humans in the past so it has learnt not to trust them.
Also sometimes, when an aggressive dog is caught, we may find that it is carrying an injury such as thorns in its paw causing it pain so it was actually lashing out to protect itself from suffering more hurt through fear of its sensitive paw being touched.
To overcome the dogs fear we must first gain its trust by treating it with kindness from a distance so that it doesn’t feel too threatened and only gradually getting closer as the dog allows us to. Once the bond is formed, the dogs fear is overcome because it learns that not every human is the same and so its confidence in humans is rebuilt.
Throughout life we experience good times and suffer bad, we have happy times and have to cope with extreme sadness but we also have to endure hurt and pain caused by others and events. Our confidence becomes shattered and so we build thick barriers to protect ourselves from more harm but these barriers also become our prison so we lead a life of “safety” but consumed with sadness, bitterness, anger and loneliness which create our anxieties through emotional stress.
If people try to knock down our barriers, we’ll lash out like a snarling dog, pushing them away because we’re too afraid of lowering our walls. Everything they say is treated with suspicion and we watch for the person to let us down because we expect it to happen. If they touch on an issue that has “stuck in our paw” from the past, we’ll attack until they submit. We show no mercy with our defence then feel bad about the pain we’ve inflicted on someone who meant no harm. We end up pushing them away because they become too afraid; not knowing what is “safe” to say.
In life though we need to come to terms with the past and “accept” what has happened like a “bad memory” so that it doesn’t keep interfering with the present and the future. In this way our thorns are gradually removed so that we become less sensitive, less suspicious and less defensive. Our barriers are slowly lowered as we allow ourselves to accept life for what it is so that we can move forward treating every day as a new day full of new experiences so that when we suffer hurt again, (as we will), it doesn’t knock us backwards because we won’t dwell on it but instead move on to a new tomorrow.
In life there will always be joy and pain but there is always someone somewhere who, given the chance, will give you the love, kindness and support you deserve but you’ll never find them if you live with persistent barriers of fear blocking “everyone” out. If the walls never budge or the snarling dog never relents, people will give up trying but if you keep “gradually” lowering your barriers, the sincere ones will always come back to keep knocking them down further until your confidence is rebuilt because they are the ones who genuinely care. My father was one such person who was not only my loss, but also a great loss to this world which is in a great need of people like him.:hugs:
In reverse, when we approach a dog, it can snarl, bark and try to bite because it has always been mistreated by humans in the past so it has learnt not to trust them.
Also sometimes, when an aggressive dog is caught, we may find that it is carrying an injury such as thorns in its paw causing it pain so it was actually lashing out to protect itself from suffering more hurt through fear of its sensitive paw being touched.
To overcome the dogs fear we must first gain its trust by treating it with kindness from a distance so that it doesn’t feel too threatened and only gradually getting closer as the dog allows us to. Once the bond is formed, the dogs fear is overcome because it learns that not every human is the same and so its confidence in humans is rebuilt.
Throughout life we experience good times and suffer bad, we have happy times and have to cope with extreme sadness but we also have to endure hurt and pain caused by others and events. Our confidence becomes shattered and so we build thick barriers to protect ourselves from more harm but these barriers also become our prison so we lead a life of “safety” but consumed with sadness, bitterness, anger and loneliness which create our anxieties through emotional stress.
If people try to knock down our barriers, we’ll lash out like a snarling dog, pushing them away because we’re too afraid of lowering our walls. Everything they say is treated with suspicion and we watch for the person to let us down because we expect it to happen. If they touch on an issue that has “stuck in our paw” from the past, we’ll attack until they submit. We show no mercy with our defence then feel bad about the pain we’ve inflicted on someone who meant no harm. We end up pushing them away because they become too afraid; not knowing what is “safe” to say.
In life though we need to come to terms with the past and “accept” what has happened like a “bad memory” so that it doesn’t keep interfering with the present and the future. In this way our thorns are gradually removed so that we become less sensitive, less suspicious and less defensive. Our barriers are slowly lowered as we allow ourselves to accept life for what it is so that we can move forward treating every day as a new day full of new experiences so that when we suffer hurt again, (as we will), it doesn’t knock us backwards because we won’t dwell on it but instead move on to a new tomorrow.
In life there will always be joy and pain but there is always someone somewhere who, given the chance, will give you the love, kindness and support you deserve but you’ll never find them if you live with persistent barriers of fear blocking “everyone” out. If the walls never budge or the snarling dog never relents, people will give up trying but if you keep “gradually” lowering your barriers, the sincere ones will always come back to keep knocking them down further until your confidence is rebuilt because they are the ones who genuinely care. My father was one such person who was not only my loss, but also a great loss to this world which is in a great need of people like him.:hugs: