Just found the site... Think I have Social Anxiety

[KateLibby]

Hi everyone

I - like lots of you - have also just found this site and am desperate for some support as I feel like everyone I know (not that I have many friends left) can totally cope with life, or at least make it appear as though they can, and I am completely lost and alone.

I suppose I have suffered from anxiety since I was about 7 yrs old. I can remember specific bouts of hysteria following the death of my aunt, grandfathers and first pet at around that age. I seemed to go through spells of being really anxious and then seemed to get over it toward the age of 11. Then, when puberty hit, I didnt handle it well at all and the anxiety started again. I think it has just increased in a rollercoaster style since then.

I am now 33 with a young baby and a great husband who sometimes shows support but other times is completely sick of me and my "behaviour". At the moment I am completely paranoid, anxious all the time, my stomach is in a constant knot and any time I get on my own (which is hardly ever since I have my little one to deal with for most of the day and I love him dearly) I just think about death or how useless I am and how much I hate myself for being like this.

I can't believe I am actually saying all this on a message board but I really do need to get it out but I don't know what I am looking for in responses to my post.... Probaly just to feel less alone and isolated.

I dont go out very often and when I do I am a complete wallflower. Some people say they think I am snobbish and that I think I am better than everyone because I am so quiet when really I am just convinced no one likes me and they all think I am a "weirdo".

I can totally be myself with my husband, but since I had our baby I have kind of let myself go as I dont have time to spend putting on makeup and doing my hair like I used to. We are also emigrating - or at least in the process of getting things in order to emigrate - and my wonderful mum died very very suddenly last year just before she was to become a Gran.

I am not on any medication - I have STILL not been to the GP. I think I am worried about them judging me and worried they might think I cant look after my baby but I can deal with him fine - in fact, he makes my life worthwhile and brings me out of my shell a little bit.

Sorry - I didnt mean to go on and on so much there. I just meant to say "Hi I have social anxiety, havent been diagnosed yet so no meds but would love to get some advice from anyone who wants to talk to me"...

Thanks for reading if you have made it this far!!!

[belle]

Hi.
Firstly i should say that you need to really see the doctor, he/she will not judge you. It is so important as a mother to a young baby to be happy. I was very sick when my son was young and now i feel i missed out on so much (still do infact), but sadly he only knows his mummy as being this way.

NO ONE will judge you here. We are all in the same boat and support each other as much as we can :)

x

[Veronica H]

:welcome: Kate. I agree that I think you should see your Dr as there is a lot that can be done for you. Counselling, CBT etc, not just Meds. It is so hard when you are a new mum even with the most understanding of partners, let alone loosing your mum. Glad you have found us, you will find comfort and support here.

Veronica

[janeybaby25]

Hiya, welcome to nmp. I strongley recommened you go see your GP. They will not judge you & can help you feel better. The only one who can make first step is you. Don't worry about people thinking you are snobbish as you are quiet. My boyfriend is very very very shy & people who don't know him think he is stuck up and he isn't at all. In fact, before I met him, I am ashammed to say I used to judge people in that way. Unfortunatly people can be ignorrant to things they don't understand. The doc, however will understand & help you all they can.They have seen it a million times over. I hope you get wonderful advice & support from this forum.

Let us know how you get on at docs & you can PM me anytime you wish to chat. xxxxxxxxxxxxx

[milly jones]

welcome to nmp hunny

love from milly xxxx

[weeble40]

Hi and a big welcome to NMP its great to have you here, hope to see you in chat sometime,

Take care

Emma xxx

[lorac]

Hi

Welcome to the site I am sure you will find people on her who understand how you feel

Take care

Carol

[Karma Stv]

:welcome:Hi there, I have also just joined after Googling my new meds and finding this amazing site by chance and firstly i would say as others have don't worry about what other people think, from my perspective you do need to see your GP thats the first big step, and it will be nowhere near as daunting as anticipating it once you are in there, just a relief! I have been off and on meds for depression/anxiety for 10 years and for the first few months it ruled me, but you learn to control it and live with it,,and it's a great feeling beating it and being able to live a normal life ,even on meds. Hope that helps and with any luck your GP shall nip yours in the bud! So Go for it:)

[pooh]

Hi there and welcome along to NMP

Pooh x