charsey
28-10-08, 01:25
I've had an anxiety disorder now for about 7 years. I have good spurts where i can live without anxiety for a while but it always comes back. Well i suppose it's always there but when i'm in a new situation where i think don't know how to deal with it my anxiety hits hard.
I'm very much aware that i over worry about what i think could be wrong with me but i also can't control it all the time.
About 8/6 weeks ago (might not even be that long ago) i saw the news where a young lady called Sarah had a mole removed 3 years ago, she was told it was fine and that it was not cancerous. The hospital made a mistake Sarah's mole was cancerous and due to this error she now has terminal cancer, she's 26 with 2 children. When i heard this story it panicked me. I'm 27, just had a baby, I have moles, i have sun bathed endlessly to get a tan in the past, i have also used sunbeds. In particular i have a mole on my chest it has gotten bigger lately but then so has my chest due to pregnancy, however i have not been able to bring myself to get it checked out as i fear that i'll be told i too have terminal cancer. I'm having to go to the doctor tomorrow to get the mole checked out because my anxiety is taking over my life, i can't concentrate on things, my memory is awful, i'm usually a very tidy person (my house looks like a bomb has hit it and i can't be bothered to tidy up properly). I'm snappy with my fiance, i don't sleep at night. I've had headaches for weeks and only just getting them under control.
I'm scared about going to the doctor, all day i've felt like crying. I know that i should go but i also don't want to. What if my fears become my reality, I've just had a beautiful baby girl that i don't feel i'm bonding with properly because my negative thoughts keep taking over.
I feel like i'm going mad
I'm very much aware that i over worry about what i think could be wrong with me but i also can't control it all the time.
About 8/6 weeks ago (might not even be that long ago) i saw the news where a young lady called Sarah had a mole removed 3 years ago, she was told it was fine and that it was not cancerous. The hospital made a mistake Sarah's mole was cancerous and due to this error she now has terminal cancer, she's 26 with 2 children. When i heard this story it panicked me. I'm 27, just had a baby, I have moles, i have sun bathed endlessly to get a tan in the past, i have also used sunbeds. In particular i have a mole on my chest it has gotten bigger lately but then so has my chest due to pregnancy, however i have not been able to bring myself to get it checked out as i fear that i'll be told i too have terminal cancer. I'm having to go to the doctor tomorrow to get the mole checked out because my anxiety is taking over my life, i can't concentrate on things, my memory is awful, i'm usually a very tidy person (my house looks like a bomb has hit it and i can't be bothered to tidy up properly). I'm snappy with my fiance, i don't sleep at night. I've had headaches for weeks and only just getting them under control.
I'm scared about going to the doctor, all day i've felt like crying. I know that i should go but i also don't want to. What if my fears become my reality, I've just had a beautiful baby girl that i don't feel i'm bonding with properly because my negative thoughts keep taking over.
I feel like i'm going mad