PDA

View Full Version : Feeling low



chucklehound
10-06-05, 13:08
I need a little support right now if you dont mind.
I was upset yesterday by someone over the phone. This person is the kind of person who will say exactly what she wants and isn't bothered who she upsets and I feel that I need to tell her how much she hurt my feelings even if this causes a row. She was on the subject of a certain person not doing anything to get better and straight after said 'while we're on the subject are you still walking up and down the street'?
I am really hurt by what she said and she is always putting me down. WShould i email her and tell her how much she has upset me? Please advice me because it has knocked my confidence.

c.jackson

florence
10-06-05, 13:53
Hi

Sorry to hear about that....I think you should let her know how you feel, if she upsetted you, she should know ...Email her and see if she apologizes..
She's well out of order for putting you down, that's my opinion.
Let us know.
Florence.

**Don't believe everything you think .**

Piglet
10-06-05, 14:23
Hi Steno,

This is such a tricky one - on the one hand I advocate telling trusted friends how you are feeling so they can help but on the other hand some friends don't always know when to let it go.

I've got some super friends who have been great over the last 6 years but I can think of two in that number who have on lots of occasions brought me down. Its almost like when I do look like I'm coping just fine they don't like it (I hope that doesnt sound ridiculous).

I remember reading a poster somewhere that said 'I've forgotten my nervous breakdown, now i wish my friends would'. That so applies to me, my doctor never said at any point I had a nervous breakdown, he called it stress yet both these people say 'course that was the time you had your breakdown' this never fails to make me feel it was all more serious than it was.

I eventually let go of one of these friendships even though undoubtably she had been so kind to me when my panic was at its worst but I noticed the basis of all her friendships was that the person had to need her and I got so sick of being treated as the needy one and being called fragile all the time - I might very well feel fragile sometimes but thats not me normally. I told her how I felt (as tactfully as poss) and she went off in a huff and hasn't spoken to me properly since which was a year ago. At the time I was upset as I hate confrontation and have rarely had fall outs as an adult but over time realised just how domineering her behaviour had been and how much it hadn't been helping.

It can be hard realising that it suits just the odd friend to have you as a friend as they can hide away from their own problems by trying to organize yours.

Thankfully out of the tons of support I've had this has only happened the once - the other friend I mention is elderly so I let it go.

Only you know when you are ready to take each new step so trust yourself - you will get there (I'm doing the up and down the street bit too).

Love Piglet[8D]

nomorepanic
10-06-05, 20:02
I think you should say something as it is has obviously upset you and she may continue to do it.

She may not realise that she has upset you so perhaps just a note to say that it did hurt you when she said that.


Nicola

"Nearly all happiness comes into our lives through doors we don't even remember leaving open"