Please, please help - going out of my mind with worry

[Blackstar]

My partner was admitted to hospital on Sunday night with an (as yet unidentified) infection. She is very, very poorly and I had to watch my normally strong and confident girlfriend in tears as they said she had to stay in, have a battery of tests and watch me leave when the nurses kicked me out. It broke my heart.

Now, two days on, she's texted me this morning to say they have the results of the blood tests and she will hopefully be told what the cause is during the morning round. But I'm here at work, going out of my mind with worry because I just have to know what it is.

I know I can't help, I'm powerless, I'm a wreck and in tears most of the time. Plus the irrational anxiety beast is worried in case it's something like HIV and I've given it to her. I've never been tested for it (too scared), although it's unlikely I'm infected. Still, I can't help worrying about it.

I am honestly at rock bottom. I can't get through to her on the phone, and I trembling with anxiety and all the symptoms of it. Can't sleep, can't eat, dizzy, tired, upset and my heart is flipping all over the place.

I would appreciate any words of wisdom, please. I don't know what to do with myself :weep:

Thank you so much...

Anna. x

[Trixie]

When you say very very poorly how poorly do you mean?

There are loads of infections going around at this time. My sister has been ill with a temp of 102 degrees, she is a lot better now. Wait until you get the results before worrying.:flowers:

[skye]

Hey,
Firstly try and calm down, deep breathes, she needs you to be as strong as you can. Have you had the blood results yet? she probably had her phone off as in the hospital. Im sure she will be okay, she is in the best place and will get good care, as hard as it is try not not to think the worst (now i wish i took my own advice on board!) They will find out what the infection is and treat it, im sure she will be okay. Just try and calm yourself down, dont think the worst, and dont sit there getting yourself in a panic its the worst feeling in the wrold. Will they let you leave work so you can at least sit at the hospital and wait? best of luck, im sure everything will be okay
Big hugs
Skye

[samc100]

Hopefully by the time you read this you will know what is wrong and your partner will be on the road to recovery.

Earlier this year I spent 4 days in hospital - in absolute agony. And it was very treatable... a course of anti-b's and many painkillers later I was fine.

It is scary but I am sure she will be fine once treatment commences..

[kendo59]

Not sure why you think you could have passed HIV on to her., but if you are finding it hard to cope atm, have you thought about asking for a couple of days off work (book it as holiday if necessary)? You could then spend more time at the hospital and perhaps get more information from the doctors.
She may need you at home fpr a couple of days after she gets out of the hospital, if she is still feeling weak.

Good luck.

[Blackstar]

Thank you so much for all your replies. Why is it that kind words make me want to cry even more?! :blush:

We are still waiting...waiting...waiting for the main blood test results to come back so still don't know what the cause is. I know these things take time - I work in a lab and know that you can't rush certain tests. But it is hard leaving the health of someone you love in someone else's (very full) hands.

Luckily my bosses are very good and would let me have time off, but she'll have other visitors today (family) so she said I should stay here (I live more than an hour away from the hospital) and look after myself. Think she'll be mad at me if I make myself ill over it all. She doesn't really understand the power of the anxiety beast!! :unsure:

You are all right, I need to calm down. I will try. That's all I can do.

Thank you again everyone, I really appreciate your kindness.

Anna. x

[samc100]

The waiting is the hardest part isn't it? Once you know what is wrong then you can deal with it.

Do try to keep calm. Making yourself ill won't help her or you... Hope news comes through soon for you x