Vicki08
09-11-08, 13:54
I dont know if I'm posting this in the right place but I really need to get some things off my chest and I feel like I have nobody to talk to at home.:weep:
I feel really really alone and scared and if anybody can give me some help then I will be so grateful.
I have been dealing with general anxiety, health anxiety, panic attacks, IBS and ectopic beats for about a year now. I was admitted to A&E last year and had a load of tests done (ECG, bloods, urine, blood pressure, sugars, physical exam) and they said it was just anxiety and referred me to my GP who in turn prescribed a whole load of drugs and I had some councelling too. The drugs didnt really work out for me so I decided to take the hard route and try and get better on my own.
Anyway, I've been struggling with this horrible anxiety and have had times when I have felt really good and times when I have felt really low. However, at this moment in time I feel lower than I have ever felt before and I dont know how to make things better. I cant cope and I am scared.
It all started about 2 weeks ago, I was up for redundancy at work (luckily I kept my job) but lost a lot of good friends at work who were made redundant. I work with mortgages and things are not that good at the moment and my boss has kind of said there will be more redundancies. I am terrified as me and my fella bought a place and are in the middle of doing it up, however money is running out and we got lots to do and we have now found out that all the central heating needs replacing. It was meant to be a new start for us and it feels like it is all going wrong.
Last week my mum was admitted to hospital and has been really unwell. She is my world and to see her ill is just awful. My car hasn't passed its MOT and needs a whole load of work. I dont know how I am going to afford it. Also my dentist has said I need root cancel on one of my teeth and I am absolutely petrified of having this work done. Also, my brother who I am really close to has kind of gone AWOL and is having a lot of problems and I dont know how to help him - its horrible seeing him like this.
To top it all, I have been having some awful palpitations that are scaring the living daylights out of me. Sometimes it feels like my heart will stop. They feel worse then what I have had before. My doctor tells me that I only had tests last year and my heart wouldnt suddenly get a life threatening disease in such a short space of time. Do you think I need more tests? I dont know.
I just want to feel better. Today, I am finding it hard to breathe and I tried doing some exercise but these horrible palpitations stopped my in my tracks. I am also worried about this splinter thing in my nail (I posted about this a while ago) I have a docs appt next week for this but am really scared it is something serious. I have had a cold for a week now and I feel so tired. I keep waking up in the night terrified.
I feel like I am cracking up. I cant talk to my best friend as she has her own problems, my mum is too unwell to talk to and my fella is also facing redundancy and I dont want to burden him with how I'm feeling.
I dont know how to get through this. I feel so run down and so unwell.
I used to be so strong and I could cope with anything, even when my Dad left home and my mum had a nervous breakdown, I held everything together but now I feel such a failure. :weep:
I am really scared that something is seriously wrong with me.:scared15:
I'm sorry for the long post but I just needed to get this off my chest. Thank you for reading and listening - it means a lot to me.
Vicki xxx
I feel really really alone and scared and if anybody can give me some help then I will be so grateful.
I have been dealing with general anxiety, health anxiety, panic attacks, IBS and ectopic beats for about a year now. I was admitted to A&E last year and had a load of tests done (ECG, bloods, urine, blood pressure, sugars, physical exam) and they said it was just anxiety and referred me to my GP who in turn prescribed a whole load of drugs and I had some councelling too. The drugs didnt really work out for me so I decided to take the hard route and try and get better on my own.
Anyway, I've been struggling with this horrible anxiety and have had times when I have felt really good and times when I have felt really low. However, at this moment in time I feel lower than I have ever felt before and I dont know how to make things better. I cant cope and I am scared.
It all started about 2 weeks ago, I was up for redundancy at work (luckily I kept my job) but lost a lot of good friends at work who were made redundant. I work with mortgages and things are not that good at the moment and my boss has kind of said there will be more redundancies. I am terrified as me and my fella bought a place and are in the middle of doing it up, however money is running out and we got lots to do and we have now found out that all the central heating needs replacing. It was meant to be a new start for us and it feels like it is all going wrong.
Last week my mum was admitted to hospital and has been really unwell. She is my world and to see her ill is just awful. My car hasn't passed its MOT and needs a whole load of work. I dont know how I am going to afford it. Also my dentist has said I need root cancel on one of my teeth and I am absolutely petrified of having this work done. Also, my brother who I am really close to has kind of gone AWOL and is having a lot of problems and I dont know how to help him - its horrible seeing him like this.
To top it all, I have been having some awful palpitations that are scaring the living daylights out of me. Sometimes it feels like my heart will stop. They feel worse then what I have had before. My doctor tells me that I only had tests last year and my heart wouldnt suddenly get a life threatening disease in such a short space of time. Do you think I need more tests? I dont know.
I just want to feel better. Today, I am finding it hard to breathe and I tried doing some exercise but these horrible palpitations stopped my in my tracks. I am also worried about this splinter thing in my nail (I posted about this a while ago) I have a docs appt next week for this but am really scared it is something serious. I have had a cold for a week now and I feel so tired. I keep waking up in the night terrified.
I feel like I am cracking up. I cant talk to my best friend as she has her own problems, my mum is too unwell to talk to and my fella is also facing redundancy and I dont want to burden him with how I'm feeling.
I dont know how to get through this. I feel so run down and so unwell.
I used to be so strong and I could cope with anything, even when my Dad left home and my mum had a nervous breakdown, I held everything together but now I feel such a failure. :weep:
I am really scared that something is seriously wrong with me.:scared15:
I'm sorry for the long post but I just needed to get this off my chest. Thank you for reading and listening - it means a lot to me.
Vicki xxx