Advice About Bullying Needed

[titchjd]

Hiya folks i know this isnt anxiety related but i would like some opinions and advice.

My daughter who is 8 is being bullied .....she was last year by the same girl and shes started again .
I know it happens in all schools and dealt with it first hand when I was a nursery teacher ..but wen its your own child its diferent .

My prob is there is a counsellor at the school you can go and see but Im not very good at keeping calm when I get started .....and I dont want 2 make things any worse for my daughter by going in 2 the school.....x
So do I have a quiet chat with the mom ..well hope it would be quiet ,leave it to see if it blows over or go in 2 the school.

It gets me so mad as they say horrible stuff about us being a single parent family and stuff about her dad which really upsets her ......they tease her cus shes little (like me ha) and have been ripping up her work .......She has told her teacher numerous times but they just say ignore her .

I find it very hard cus i want 2 say just turn round and belt her 1 but I know thats not the answer and I havent bought her up that way ..see i was a fighter at school and got in lots of trouble which Im not proud of and dont want Jade 2 be the same but maybe I have been 2 soft with her .
Thanx 4 reading

Titchjd xxxxxxxxxx

[bottleblond]

Oh been there, done that! Still am really.

Ok firstly...Do you know the mother? If you do then sure you could have a quiet word. Try to be nice, polite and calm. Tell her that if doesn't stop then you will get the police involved. After 8 months Of Ben being bullied, that's exactly what i did and it was the ONLY thing that worked.

Also have a quiet word with your daughters teacher and tell her exactly what has been going on and ask her to have a word with the playground assistants to keep an eye on her. Afterall your daughter is the schools responsibility from she goes in-in the morning till she comes home.

Stand up and be counted hun! It's hard but if i can do it then anyone can.

Love and hugs to you and the wee yin
Lisa
xxxx
:bighug1:

[marie1974]

hi titch, i have had this a few times, i would first go have quiet word with teacher, explain situation and ask teacher to keep an eye out and possibly keep them apart, if after that it dont work then i would have a word with the parent matey.

i know its hard with your own kids and knowing when to step in and when not too, but at the end of the day, no child should b bullied at school and if it does happen it should b nipped in bud by teachers quickly.

im like u matey i tend to get very angry when probs with the kids and have to bite my tongue and try to behave like a grownup hehe.

im having it alittle with my eldest at secondary school in yr 7 and i feel so sad cos although he put a stop to alot of it himself, he still gets people saying nasty things like he got a funny head and he got spots, and someone said to me oh its silly kids stuff, mayb so but when its constant it begins to make u paranoid and i find him looking in the mirror and stuff wondering.

i always tell him he gorgeous and they just jealous cos he goodlooking and clever but it dont really sink in with them at that age.

atleast our kids are all loved and not like the bad ones that feel they have to bully to feel good matey, remember that, our kids are good kids xxx

[eeyorelover]

Right there with ya darlin!!
I read your post and thought 'tell her to let her have it and maybe the girl will leave her alone'!!
I know that isn't the answer and that violence never is but when you see your little one going thru something like this all a mom can think is about way laying the person who is making her unhappy!!!
I can tell you what NOT to do!
My daughter had an issue with a boy that was hitting her in the boob everyday.
She told everyone!!!
Nothing happened.
So I thought I would be able to explain to the little lad about the invisible bubble that a girl should have around her and how it is terribly inappropriate to hit a girl in her private areas or anywhere else for that matter.
The kid was a trouble maker with a capitol T!
Always bullying other kids even pulled a knife on one and nothing ever seemed to happen to him!!
So I was nice and polite and explained it to him and he says....
What cha going to do if I hit her again?? Cops won't do anything!! The school won't do anything!! And I'm a minor so you can't do anything to me! My parent's won't do anything to me!!!
I LOST MY COOL!!
Here is the beginning of the example of what not to do.....
READY????
;)
I felt my face get hot!! And I said back to him, "You are right. I can't do anything to you. But I can go to your house and do something to your mother!!! I've seen her and I know I could whoop her!!!
PMSL
I can't believe I said that to a 15 year old!!!!
I felt awful bad about it later!!!
Guess all mothers have their emotions closely linked with their children's.
If the child is happy the mom is happy.

Anyway I just thought maybe my 'what not to do' might make you smile.
Good luck, stay strong, and give that little one an extra hug from me tonite :)
xxx
Sandy