Telling other people????

[Patty]

Hi everyone,:)

I was wondering if you have told other people that you have panic/anxiety/depression/OCD or do you keep it all to yourself? If you have told others what response did you get - if you keep it to yourself why?

My family know that I have panic & anxiety but I have never told anyone else (Except NMPers of course:winks: and email friends who also have anxiety). I think I am afraid to - why? - I'm afraid of the response. I find that trying to keep up appearances when out in case someone else notices can be an added pressure in itself. I have to apply for jobs in the near future and some application forms have the question - Have you ever had stress/anxiety/depression. Do you write Yes or No??

Would love to hear of your thoughts/experiences.

Best wishes xx :bighug1:

[janeybaby25]

my friends & family know & if anyone asks I shall tell them but I don't feel the need to put it on my facebook status! Not cos I am ashamed just cos I don't want to explain myself over & over & over again! x

[Wenjoy]

I never put it on job applications - my husband is the only one who knows though my family know I had pahic attacks when I was 22 until I was 24 and then I got better but now (i am 48 and going through menopause) only hubby knows and he knows its all the fun things like meals out,theatre,etc etc which cramps our lives a lot!!! Wenjoy x

[honeybee3939]

Hi

I have always been very open about telling people about my Agorophobia. Even people i have met in the street who say they havent seen me for a while. To be honest its amazed me how many people i have told either know someone or have suffered themselves it always gets a converstaion going. I wouldnt put it on a application form though.

:hugs:
Andrea
xxxx

[Baggie]

Hi Patty

I have developed anxiety and panic in the last couple of months, having had one full blown panic attack which was scary. The only people who know about it are my husband, my parents, my brother & sister in law plus my closest friend. At this point in my life, I don't want to have to explain myself to everyone, so I just confide in the people that I'm closest to. It's what makes me comfortable & what works for me. Maybe in time, I will tell others, but not just now.

Baggie :)

[baldy_dude]

Hey everyone.... As for me I'm not ashamed of how I am. I don't tell people about it, cause they don't need to know - In the same way I don't tell them what I get paid. However, my immediate family and my employeer knows (my company are fantastic - provides a lot of work life balance). I can't believe some companies actually ask that question on an application form - its a disgrace!

Whatever you do don't answer yes to it - what right does a prospective employer have, to nosey into every part of your personal life? None. You may soon see application forms even getting rid of date of birth, due to age descrimination - its about time they got rid of this type of question as well.

So faced with this question on an application form.... I'd be answering NO. and wouldn't give it a second thought!

[gtrgrl3369]

Everyone I work with and my family know because I have had major panic at work and they have helped me. I am not ashamed of what I have or when I have it. I usually dont have attacks that much anymore, but it is nice to know that people are thee for me if I need a calm voice of reason.

[pinkpiglet]

Several years ago i was ashamed of having anxiety and never told anyone about it (although i am sure people must have known). Then something in me changed, i am open about other aspects of my life so i thought, why not be open about everything? My anxiety is part of me. it is who i am!
When i applied for my job, i was open and honest, then the same in my interview. I told my manager all about my anxiety (especially this years hurricane). I got the job & am relaxed as i am not hiding anything. All my colleagues know (AND WERE SURPRISED!) my friends, my family, my hairdresser, my beautician. I have no hang ups about Myself.
Don't get me wrong, i wish anxiety would pack up it's belongings and get the hell outta my life, but it isnt getting the hint so i have to live with it..........for now!

[Patty]

Hi everyone,:)

A big thank-you to everyone who posted. Your replies have been very helpful. :yesyes: :yesyes:

Thanks again & best wishes xx :bighug1:

[Twin Galaxies]

i never tell people as a 22 year old male i fear people wont under stand or may take advantage of me because of it, my mum knows but does not understand and just thinks im being soft, but my best mate of 12 years suffers the same as me he has aorophobia also so we help eachother out, if anything happens in public at the times i have to leave the house or if anything happens around people i havent told ill say iv got a bug or sumthing and make a quick getaway

[MacAodh]

I only started telling people after I was formally diagnosed by the psychiatrist. I do try and hide it, but I have to say no one I have told has reacted in a negative way - most people have been great, and as someone else said most either have experienced it first hand or through a friend. Any shame is unfounded and I'd be inclined to say its just a symptom of depression.

[ladybird64]

Hi Patty :)

I don't think there's a "one size fits all" answer to this! I'm honestly not sure what I would put on a job application form.
I have never had a "formal" diagnosis although I have had years of suffering from panic in certain situations, it was only while trying to look for answers on the internet that I realised that I had agoraphobia.
Funnily enough, I don't have a problem telling people that I have agoraphobia (usually when I'm in a situation where it may be apparent that all is not well :winks: ) but I cannot bring myself to say that I suffer from anxiety. I know it's daft but I do feel ashamed to admit this..I guess that for so long I have kept up the image of being a very strong person, I would hate for anyone to think that I couldn't cope with day to day situations.
I know, I'm my own worst enemy sometimes..:blush:

[freakedout]

Hi,

I kept my anxiety and panic to myself except for family and a close friend. Over the years I had to mention it to the odd colleague because I started to get very self-conscious of my behaviour and thought people might think I am wierd. I havent worked now for nearly 4 years but with hindsight I wished I had told people at work how I felt back then because trying to cover up and make excuses all the time added to my stress.

Now I openly admit that I have problems 'with my nerves' - most people seem to understand that language. Some people 'get it' and some people just do not understand at all, the thing is I feel that I cannot hide it and so to be open makes it easier for me to cope. Having said that its not like I tell everybody, but it is also amazing how supportive some people can be when they know.

Take care,

Freaky

[Franz]

I've had mixed responses. In my first job I once told my boss about my problem because it came up in my appraisal that my interpersonal skills were very poor. I got on fairly well with my boss and I thought she'd be sympathetic - but in fact she was embarrassed and changed the subject immediately. She was quite young though.

I have mentioned my problems in passing to my friends but they tend to change the subject too. It has often surprised me that even good friends draw the line at personal disclosure of feelings.

That said, I have told my most recent 3 bosses about my problems and they have all been extremely helpful and sympathetic. They all made a point of telling me that my work was valued, and that helped.

[Patrick S]

I wouldn't put it on a job application. My job means that I am on my own for 80% of the day. And the other 20% is with clients, and to be honest i get so involved with clients that I'm too distracted to worry over getting anxiety or a PA in front of them.
My family doesn't know. They worry as it is, and I find I deal with it better like that, also they live in a different country so they don't have that immediate response of coming to see me if they're worried.
As for other people, including my work colleagues, I just tell them I suffer from an anxiety disorder, and am prone to panic attacks. I'm a 28 year old man, and there is a certain amount of stigma attached to telling people because of the idea that it's a not a real or very serious thing. Which of course is total tripe!