Poisoned myself again.. emetophobia

[choccy25]

My fear has come true again... I had food poisoning at the end of August.
I hated this hell. I stopped eating, lost over a stone, fainted at work a few weeks ago and have been off work since to recover my strength and gain nutritional insight.

A few days ago I got a stomach bug that was contracted by not cooking some meat properly. I was sick and had the runs for two days. I am now hating myself and so scared. Being sick was horrible and I was sweating in fear more than the bug itself.

I dont want to eat and I am disappointed that in the range of three months I can give myself food poisoning twice.

My employees are getting me CBT and I have been pretending to take AD to appease my parents and doctor.

I am now pertrified of my own body. Being sick is the worst feeling in the world. Its my nightmare.

[Anxious_gal]

ok if your that worried, do you think not eating meat might help? like eating vegitarian meat instead? or even precooked meat that you heat up?
i get the fear of poisining sometimes, one time I was worried my own grandmother had put something in my food!

[connie1985]

I have the same fear but mine used to be so extreme I wouldn't eat a thing for weeks on end and trust me it's not healthy and it's far more likely to make you not well mentally! I have a really bad anxiety disorder that makes me gag everytime I panic and it's all because of my phobia and years of starving my body of any nurishment! please eat properly you don't want to end up like me! If you do choose to cut out meat then make sure you still eat fruit and veg also take vitamins! I havnt been sick for 12 years now and that just proves how obsessed I am about everything! I'm getting hypnotherapy for it on the 27th of this month as I don't think I would have the guts to do cbt! Don't let that put you off tho and you have to let me know if the cbt works! It controls my life in more ways than u can imagine and now with the anxiety on top of it all I havnt even been out of the house for weeks! I know it's all irrational but that doesn't help me, that why hypnotherapy is apparently the best therapy, it makes you think so what if I'm sick it's my bodys way of protecting itselp! I can't imagine myself saying that at the moment but hopefully I can in the future! Sorry if I have gone on a bit!
Take care of yourself and let me know how your getting on! Connie x

[janeybaby25]

aw hun, I hope you are ok. I got gastric flu in May this yr & that flared up my anxiety. Not because of being sick, just 'cos I almost fainted. My fear, is collapsing & not waking up. I did suffer from anxiety last year but had been anxious free until I had this gastric flu. Then a couple a weeks ago I got a tummy bug again! Luckily this time it wasn't as bad & it didn't flare up bad panic attacks, although it wasn't pleasent. Hypnotherapy helped me & also CBT. If you want to PM feel free hun. Take care. xxx

[choccy25]

Hi all,

Feeling better today.. started taking 5HTP and its making me feel calmer.

Seems I have a stomach ulcer so I am not poisoning myself. The period of not eating has aggrivated the pylori bacteria left in my stomach from my food poisoning at the end of August. It has left me with this ulcer in the stomach lining.

I have assessments and treatments underway but I feel relieved that I could control my fear.